"Hm," Shan Si mused, his lips curled childishly. His head tilted toward Tao Hua's hand, and against his delicately soft palm. It was a look of mischievous innocence. "How do I know? That's a good question."
Without a response, Tao Hua awaited Shan Si's answer, his finger unconsciously stroking Shan Si's cheek, unable to look away. He couldn't explain what that expression did to him, or invoked, but it made him want to slink closer despite there being little room left between them.
A weakness overwhelmed him, and unintentionally, he allowed his weight to distribute onto that lap.
"Could it be that I have people tracking your every move…?" Shan Si teased, guiding the entwined hands toward the two, and assisting Tao Hua with placing them on his shoulders, settling his own on Tao Hua's hip.
His eyelids fell, and a satisfied smile lingered deviously. "Or maybe an amulet? A protective one that ignites when you're distressed?"
A light breath escaped Tao Hua's lips. He could feel his ears burning up, but each time he thought he became uncomfortably aware of such, Shan Si's voice dragged him back into that light fervour.
It especially became frustrating each time Shan Si would reach in to kiss him, only to pull away and speak. Tao Hua wasn't used to such impatience, and his own body responded by trying to lift himself higher to reach them.
"No. That can't be it either," Shan Si hummed, his head tilting back and pulling away from the kiss. Powerlessness and indignation overcame Tao Hua, written all over his face. "What? What's with that face of yours? You look so eager. Are you really that curious, Tao Hua?"
Hand against his lower back, splaying across, Shan Si slid it upward while dragging along Tao Hua's shirt. Toward the sides of his ribs his fingers curled, arching Tao Hua's back inward. He inclined his head near Tao Hua's shoulder, unconsciously nudging Tao Hua's hand away, forcing him to move it toward Shan Si's upper arm.
Never before had he realise just how firm that arm felt. An outlandish impression clutched Tao Hua, as if wanting to constrict his throat.
Against his ear, his breath unfairly tormented Tao Hua. Since their cheeks were pressed together, the heat was almost searing enough to wipe away anxiety and forget they were in the midst of the frigid autumn winds.
Inside an abandoned hut of some long-gone Daoist, somewhere in the adolescence of the forest.
And his voice…that voice, it nearly made Tao Hua's eyes roll up and convulse when it spoke, sending shivers up his spine. In a low, rough whisper, Shan Si added, "I think I know."
Breathing now utterly ragged, Tao Hua found himself falling limp. If it weren't for Shan Si's secure grip on his swealtering body, he'd have collapsed then and there.
Was that good or bad? Indulgence was a double-edged sword, gleaming frivolously.
"Nngh." Tao Hua's eyes vacated all reason, and his lashes drooped. Was there really any reason to protest any longer? Both were beyond the point of return for anything to matter.
"Do you what to hear it?" Shan Si asked. Tao Hua sluggishly nodded, his cheek rubbing against the other, its friction unbearable. A few tuts from Shan Si, and then the shake of his head.
Tao Hua couldn't help but feel an unknown sense of irritation, and his hand gingerly slapped Shan Si's arm. Then, as if incapable of strength, it slipped a few times through his squirming and impatience.
He was desperately trying to position himself closer than was humanly possible.
Every one of Tao Hua's actions demanded that Shan Si hurry, without words—only trembling, jerky breaths.
"Without payment?" Shan Si's question, poised as more of an accusation, made Tao Hua freeze up in Shan Si's grasp.
What did he mean by payment? Each time Tao Hua wanted a kiss, he pulled away. That was the only payment between the two.
As if hesitating, Tao Hua's face wrinkled, and toward the nape of Shan Si's neck, he carefully placed his lips. Truly, he didn't know what he was doing, but it must have been the right thing, given that each time he rolled his hips forward, he felt a rigid pressure of excitement against Shan Si's lower half.
Pressing light, overly innocent kisses along his skin of his neck, toward his shoulders, Tao Hua could feel Shan Si's chest elevate slowly with his shoulders, his breathing uneven as it radiated against Tao Hua's ears.
Then, a breathy laugh—one low and filled with greed, satisfaction, and even tucked-away rage.
Why it induced Tao Hua foolish, he wasn't sure.
Pulling his head away, and Tao Hua from his neck, Shan Si examined his face; a face so glazed over and helpless, he wasn't sure what innate desire stirred within him. It was akin to anger, but it wasn't anger, but perhaps an excuse to completely let himself go and use up this man.
However, despite this, he remained gentle, even if his smirk looked pained. Binding his entire arm around Tao Hua's waist and removing his hand from his hip, he reached up and pinched Tao Hua's chin.
"If I tell you, will you do as I say?" Shan Si asked hastily, as if awaiting permission, yet holding the reins, all at the same time. Without even thinking, Tao Hua mindlessly nodded. His mind was fogged, like that mothered in the haze of a cloud—one floating away far away from reason. At this point, no gust of wind could bring it back to the skies, so drudged in dusk.
"What if it's not as exciting as you hoped?"
Annoying. Tao Hua mumbled, "T-Tell me."
"Demanding, are we?" Shan Si laughed. Tao Hua's bottom lip crinkled unenthusiastically, but his face leaned in closer to Shan Si. He was like a magnet constantly attracted to the other.
Whatever came over him, it wasn't his typical self, but it was something bubbling up since fleeing the Imperial Capital. Lips only a second away from each other, Tao Hua muttered, "You have to tell me."
"And if I don't?" Shan Si teased. This time, it was Tao Hua who pushed his head away from Shan SI and stared down at him with a face filled with devastation, contorting every gentle exterior on his face. The same one Shan Si could recall from when they first met, and the very one that had him interested in this man.
It tugged at his heart, and so aggressively, too. Just from witnessing such a sight, Shan Si found himself unable to deny the precious man on his lap anything. Immediately, he rubbed his hand along Tao Hua's cheek and coaxed, "It's okay. It's okay. I'm just kidding."
He brought him in for a kiss, his words nibbling against Tao Hua's lips. As he spoke, his own hips slowly rolled. It wasn't too quick, but it also wasn't too slow.
Despite his own ecstasy surging, the one thing he was cautious of was not to overwhelm Tao Hua. And still, his heart could help the elation pounding, knowing that Tao Hua was responding with as much want and desire as he was.
"All day…You've been tense all day, and I just couldn't shake off the feeling that something was wrong," Shan Si answered, half-distracted between Tao Hua and his thoughts. "The palace—it was too easy."
The last of his words mumbled into another kiss.
"Do you understand what you've done to me?" Shan Si asked, slipping into yet another, more pronounced declaration, enough that Tao Hua couldn't pull back even if he wanted to.
This time, as he pulled away to speak, Tao Hua's tongue—though only protruding by a sliver—impatiently begged him not to leave, his lips glistening with the remnants.
"For years…I've anticipated the day I could finally get my hands on the Imperial Capital relic," his pale eyes reeled down, toward the fabric that clung aggressively to Tao Hua's skin. Hatred loomed, simply at an article of clothing. He couldn't help but laugh through his explanation. "When I finally had it in my hand…do you know what I was thinking about?"
Tao Hua shook his head, his eyes stuck on Shan Si's lips, like a poor man gone hungry.
"How I needed to see Tao Hua's face, or be with Tao Hua. I wasn't excited about finally getting the relic…" Shan Si muttered, leaning in to peck just under Tao Hua's jaw while toying with the sash that held together the top of his undergarments.
A subtle whimper escaped Tao Hua. It was far more sensitive than he imagined to both the feeling of warm lips slathered against his skin, and even the Shan Si's explanation.
To feel wanted, to the point nothing else seemed to matter…his body finally fell into the abyss, and no longer did he feel any control over himself. His hips bucked forward the moment Shan Si grazed over the thin skin between his neck and collarbone, and his arms wrapped soundly around his shoulders.
"See? The thing is…I'm no fortune teller," Shan Si's laugh ricocheted off his collarbone, the once busy hand now tracing along Tao Hua's exposed torso. Against the ridges of his ribs, toward the contours of his chest, Shan Si treated it as if touching gold for the first time. "I just really wanted to be with Tao Hua…so bad. If the palace hadn't been empty, I probably would have just given up."
"…" Swallowing until his throat ran dry, Tao Hua positioned his hands against Shan Si's shoulders and shifted himself up enough to place a kiss on his forehead. It wasn't elegant by any means. It was light enough to exist as a ghost, gentle to the touch, and remained there for a while, enough to widen Shan Si's eyes.
Struggling, Tao Hua stammered out as much as he could, his hips brushing against Shan Si's stomach—if he hadn't been outed for his current state earlier, he was now.
"I really wanted…I really wanted to be with you…too…" Tao Hua attempted, his posture threatening to collapse each time his body moved, irritating down below. Though he tried to remain collected, his whisper sounded more like a crying plea.
And although he wanted to laugh and ask, How do we get here?
He didn't.
Instead, he breathed in hopeless beats, adhering to the yearning that churned within his abdomen. "I need Shan Si."
No longer did this thirst exist in his dreams, hidden between the words on a page, nor induced by substance. For once, he was presently participating in this sinful pleasure. Every impact; from the way Shan Si's thumb pressed aggressively between his chest and ribs, to the arm that hugged him so tightly it could have snapped Tao Hua.
Tao Hua felt as though he'd end up devoured whole.
Like a bubbling cauldron of suffocating aromas finally boiling over, Shan Si inhaled. It was strong, impatient, and when he exhaled, the hand coiled around Tao Hua's waist undid itself.
Unsupported, Tao Hua fell into his own instability, his ass landing on Shan Si's thighs. Heaving, his slumberous eyes glanced at the fingers rubbing Tao Hua's thigh, and then up to the haughty smile expression that twisted into a smile, coy—as if overcome with a fever that struck him dumb with lust.
"Strip," he ordered, the hand on Tao Hua's thighs creeping upward, slapping the band against his pants against his pale skin.
"Your clothes, and then mine. Remove them."
Chapter end.