Chapter 3: How to Crash a Party, Dragon-Style
Natsu's idea of "crashing a party" was, as I probably should have expected, about as subtle as a meteor strike. He marched towards the docks with a fiery look in his eyes, completely ignoring the fact that his one and only weakness was currently bobbing gently in the harbor.
"Okay, here's the plan," he said, pointing a determined finger at the gaudy yacht, which was lit up like a cheap casino. "We get on the boat, find that fake Salamander, and I punch him!"
Happy nodded enthusiastically. "Aye, sir! Best plan!"
I floated between them, my psychic senses screaming in protest. That's not a plan, that's a single-step instruction that completely ignores the 'getting on the boat' part! His character sheet must have dumped all its points into Strength and Constitution and left Intelligence at 3.
"Natsu," Happy said, his little face scrunched in thought. "The boat is on the water."
Natsu's confident expression immediately wilted. He looked at the gentle lapping of the waves against the pier, and his face turned a familiar shade of sickly green. "Oh. Right. Water."
And there it is, I thought with an internal sigh. The motion sickness debuff. The most powerful enemy a Dragon Slayer can face.
"I can fly you there!" Happy offered, puffing out his chest.
"Yeah! Do it!" Natsu agreed, before immediately looking like he regretted it.
What followed was one of the most pathetic attempts at an aerial insertion I have ever witnessed. Happy, bless his tiny wings, could barely lift Natsu a foot off the ground. They wobbled through the air like a faulty drone carrying a payload far beyond its capacity, with Natsu groaning and looking like he was about to lose his dinner.
This is painful to watch. Time for the support character to do his job.
I let them struggle for another ten seconds for my own amusement, then I sighed and took action. I focused, wrapping Natsu and Happy in an invisible bubble of telekinetic energy. With a smooth, effortless mental push, I lifted them high into the air and propelled them silently towards the yacht, stabilizing Natsu's body so the rocking motion was completely negated.
Natsu blinked, the green fading from his face. "Whoa! Hey, I'm not sick anymore! And we're flying fast!"
"It's Mew!" Happy chirped, looking back at me as I floated along behind them. "He's carrying us with his magic!"
"You're the best, little guy!" Natsu cheered.
We landed softly on the ship's roof, completely undetected. Below us, the party was in full swing. Loud music, laughing girls, and Bora preening in the center of it all. I scanned the deck and found Lucy, standing awkwardly off to the side, holding a glass of wine she clearly hadn't touched. My psychic warning was doing its job; she was on high alert.
"Okay, I'm gonna go punch him now," Natsu whispered, preparing to jump down.
Not yet, you shonen-protagonist buffoon. Let the villain monologue. It's a requirement. I placed a firm telekinetic hand on his shoulder, holding him in place.
He struggled for a second. "Hey, what gives?"
I sent a simple thought: Wait.
Down below, Bora raised his glass. "A toast! To my lovely guests!"
As the girls drank, I felt the magic in the wine activate. A potent sleeping spell. One by one, the girls collapsed into their chairs, fast asleep. Lucy, thanks to my warning, had only pretended to sip her drink. She dropped the glass, her eyes wide with horror.
"What did you do?!" she yelled.
Bora's charming smile twisted into a greasy, villainous sneer. "Welcome aboard my slave ship, little girl. You and these other pretty things are going to fetch a high price over in Bosco."
He snapped his fingers, and his goons—a collection of thugs who looked like they'd failed the entrance exam for every other dark guild—emerged from the shadows, grabbing the sleeping girls.
Ah, the big reveal, I commented internally. Classic rookie mistake. Never monologue before the hero is completely incapacitated. He's practically begging for a party crasher.
"Now!" Natsu growled, and this time I let him go.
He leaped from the roof, landing on the deck with a loud THUD that made the whole ship shake.
"So, you're a Fairy Tail wizard, huh?" Natsu said, his voice dangerously low as he cracked his knuckles. "I've never seen you at the guild before."
Bora and his goons stared, shocked. "Who the hell are you?"
Natsu grinned, a feral, fiery light in his eyes. He pointed a thumb at his own chest, where a red emblem was proudly displayed. "I'm Natsu Dragneel of Fairy Tail! And I've never seen you before in my life!"
The iconic hero entrance. It gave me chills, even though I knew it was coming.
Bora, realizing he was dealing with the real deal, panicked. "Get him, boys! Throw him into the sea!"
The goons charged. What followed was less of a fight and more of a one-sided beatdown. Natsu moved like a blur, his fists wreathed in flames. But I decided I could help speed things up. I was a support character, after all.
As one goon ran towards Natsu, I telekinetically tied his shoelaces together. He went down face-first with a comical yelp.
Another goon tried to use a magic gun. I subtly bent the barrel of the gun upwards with a psychic nudge. The magic bullet shot harmlessly into the sky, hitting a seagull which squawked in indignation.
A third, particularly large goon was about to bring a club down on Natsu's head from behind. I reached out and gave his pants a powerful telekinetic yank. They fell straight to his ankles, causing him to trip and fall flat on his face.
Natsu, completely in his element, didn't even notice my interventions. He was too busy delivering a fiery beatdown. "Fire Dragon's Iron Fist!" he roared, sending the last goon flying overboard.
Lucy stared, her jaw on the floor, watching the utter chaos unfold.
Bora, seeing his crew defeated, got desperate. He unleashed his own magic, a disgusting purple flame. "Prominence Typhoon!" he yelled, sending a spiral of fire at Natsu.
Natsu just stood there and started... eating it.
"Gross!" he choked, swallowing the last of the foul-tasting flames. "This is the worst fire I've ever eaten. Now it's my turn!"
Just as Natsu was about to unleash his own attack, the ship, having drifted from the port, began to rock on the waves. Natsu's face instantly turned green again.
"Oh no..." he groaned, collapsing to his knees.
Bora laughed. "What's this? A Fairy Tail wizard who gets seasick? This is my chance! Red Shower!" He sent a volley of purple fireballs raining down.
"Lucy! Your keys!" I projected into her mind.
She snapped out of her stupor, grabbing a golden key from her belt. "Open, Gate of the Water Bearer! Aquarius!"
A torrent of water erupted from the deck, and from it emerged a blue-haired mermaid with a perpetual scowl and an urn.
Oh boy, the water tsundere, I thought. Her relationship with Lucy is... complicated. Note to self: do not get on her bad side. Ever.
"Tch. You dropped my key, didn't you?" Aquarius snapped, glaring at Lucy. "And don't you dare interrupt my date with my boyfriend again! I'll kill you!"
"I'm sorry! But I need your help!" Lucy pleaded.
Aquarius rolled her eyes, then unleashed a massive wave from her urn without even aiming. "Don't order me around!"
The colossal wave washed over everything—Bora, his goons, Natsu, Lucy, the ship—everything. It was a ridiculously overpowered attack that hit friend and foe alike. The entire yacht was lifted up and slammed, with a deafening CRUNCH, directly into the port town's harbor, demolishing half the docks in the process.
The good news? Natsu was no longer on a moving vehicle.
He stood up from the wreckage, a terrifyingly cheerful smile on his face. "Alright! I'm all fired up now!"
The ground was stable beneath his feet. The motion sickness was gone. The training weights were off.
"Now I can really let loose," he said, his fists igniting with brilliant, clean fire. He took a deep breath, his cheeks puffing out.
And there goes the budget for this episode, I thought, floating calmly above the destruction. This is going to be expensive.
"FIRE DRAGON'S ROAR!"
A massive torrent of flame, a hundred times more powerful than Bora's pathetic purple fire, erupted from his mouth. It wasn't just a fire attack; it was a force of nature, a miniature sun that vaporized Bora and carved a molten trench through the port.
The fight was over. The port was, for all intents and purposes, annihilated.
Sirens wailed in the distance. The Rune Knights, the kingdom's military police, were on their way.
"Uh oh, we gotta go!" Lucy panicked.
Natsu, however, just walked over to the wreckage, grabbed Lucy by the wrist, and started running. "Come on!"
"Where are we going?!" she yelled.
Natsu turned back, flashing her the most brilliant, trouble-making grin I had ever seen.
"You said you wanted to join Fairy Tail, right?" he said. "So let's go!"
Lucy's eyes widened, a look of pure, unadulterated joy spreading across her face. In the midst of the chaos, the sirens, and the smoldering ruins of the port, her dream was coming true.
I let out a happy little mewl and teleported ahead of them, content to wait for my new, chaotic friends to catch up. The adventure was just beginning.