I had spent most of the morning waiting for a servant to admit he suspected me.
He'd been waiting for me to let him take the breakfast tray.
By the time I worked it out, the tea was cold and the young footman had stood beside it for nearly an hour. I pointed at the dishes. He gathered them with both hands, keeping the spoon from rattling, and left so promptly that I almost called him back to apologize. That would have made things worse. Probably.
I knew which decisions could kill Cedric in an entrance examination. The room itself was taking longer. His clothes were arranged by occasion, his desk locked from underneath, and nobody removed a dish until he allowed it. I tried to remember all three while dressing for dinner.
The collar covered the pulse at the base of my throat. Two pairs of formal gloves lay in the drawer. I shut it; I didn't want to find out how their fastenings worked in front of somebody. When the knock came, I was still checking the mirror.
The older attendant led me along a corridor of portraits. At each turn I waited half a step, letting him go first. If he noticed, he said nothing. We reached a pair of open doors, and I saw the silver at the Duke's temples before I quite recognized his face.
Four places had been laid. Only his had been used.
He set down his glass as I entered.
"You kept the household waiting."
"I was told to expect an escort."
His gaze moved past me. Behind my shoulder, the attendant took a breath and held it.
"I should have asked for the hour," I said.
The Duke left me standing a little longer, then indicated the chair at his right. I sat while one servant poured water and another brought a bowl, turning its pattern toward the head of the table. I kept my spoon on the cloth until the Duke picked up his.
"Your preparations?"
"Under way."
"You said that last week."
I broke off some bread. Last week I had been putting off the rent while trying to finish a game. I didn't know what Cedric had been putting off.
"The academy will judge the result."
"The academy will judge what I send it."
His spoon rested in the bowl. I had already lifted mine; I swallowed what was in it and set it down carefully.
"People will make allowances for your name, Cedric. Don't give them too much to excuse."
I tried to find an answer Cedric might have given. He would have sneered at the people making allowances. In the game, he was always ready with some insult, usually just before doing something stupid. I couldn't afford either part.
"They will remember the name."
A faint smile. I wasn't sure I'd chosen well, but he moved on to the instructors. I mentioned the academy and let him name the man he actually meant. When he asked about a family obligation, I said I understood the importance of appearances. He began to correct me, stopped, and told me that a visitor would arrive before I left.
I nodded. The bread had softened where my thumb held it. I put it down.
As the bowls were being cleared, a server caught the base of my water glass with his cuff. I reached out and steadied it. He froze, his arm still across the table, and I realized the Duke was watching my hand.
"The table is crowded," I said, letting go.
"It has always been this size."
The server withdrew. I watched my plate until the next dish arrived: meat in dark sauce, sliced so thin that the carving knife wasn't needed. The Duke used it on the bread instead. There was something awkward about that large knife and the small piece he cut, but he took his time.
"You need not pretend the household has become unfamiliar."
I brought my elbows closer to my sides. There was plenty of space around the plate.
"I haven't been sleeping well."
Four times during the night I'd woken and gone to the mirror. I almost told him that. Then he would ask why, and I would have to keep talking.
"Then correct your habits." He ate the bread. "Your sister used to blame her mistakes on sleeplessness."
My knife caught against the plate.
I knew Cedric's bloodline and his engagement. I knew what to say to provoke him into three different losing fights. I could remember three versions of his execution, one in considerable detail. None of that produced a sister.
The edge of the knife was pressing into the glaze. I put it down.
"I remember."
I waited, looking at him. A name would have helped. Anything would have helped.
"See that you remember what matters."
He returned to his food. I picked up the knife again and cut a piece small enough to swallow quickly if he spoke.
Departure was less than a month away. Reports from the academy would reach him; he made that clear without asking whether I understood. Several times I said nothing because I couldn't think of a safe answer, and he continued as though I had agreed. By the end of the meal, I wasn't sure how many things I'd promised.
He rose. I pushed back my chair to follow.
"A demonstration before you leave."
"Of what?"
His eyes settled on me. I stayed half upright, holding the chair, with no way to take the question back.
"Your readiness."
"I will arrange the court."
"The household will arrange it. You will attend."
He left through the far door. The servants waited until it closed before they moved, and I sat again. My legs didn't feel ready to carry me back along the corridor.
Across from me, an untouched napkin lay with its corners aligned to the grain of the table. The plate was clean. I looked at the fourth place, then at the door. Were they always laid? Had someone been expected tonight?
The nearest servant saw me open my mouth. He lowered the dish in his hands and waited.
"Water," I said.
The older attendant took me back to my room. At the door I stopped him.
"When I'm expected somewhere, tell me the hour. Not the usual hour. And if a visitor comes for me, tell me who it is and why they've come before you bring them in."
"Even an expected visitor, my lord?"
"Yes. Wait for my answer."
He glanced into the room, then back at me. "Name and purpose first. Shall I have them wait downstairs?"
"Until I've answered."
"Very good, my lord."
He withdrew. I took paper from the desk and wrote down the Duke's questions. I tried to keep my answers exactly as I'd given them, though one already sounded better in my memory. At the bottom of the page I wrote Sister.
I left room beneath it.