Eli stared at the ceiling for a long moment, organizing his thoughts and plans for the future. Just then, Juli opened the door from outside, and the smell of starchy potatoes, beef broth, and fresh herbs soon wafted into the room.
"I'm back!"
Juli nudged the door shut with her hip and help up two clay bowls like trophies.
"Innkeeper's wife was still up. Look at this! Got the last of tonight's stew, and she threw in the heel of a bread loaf since I helped her carry the pot down from the fire."
Eli rose and composed his face. His legs trembled with weakness, but he stepped forward and hugged Juli, his arms wrapping around her head.
"Juli, you are the light of my life."
"Ah—"
Juli's voice pitched up in surprised as she scrambled to keep both bowls level, the stew sloshing dangerously close to the rims.
"Hey, hey, the bowls! The stew! You can't just — ugh—"
She couldn't shove him off without dropping dinner, so she just stood there, stuck, while her chin pressed against his collarbone.
"…W-What's this for?"
Eli didn't answer right away. He just tightened his arms a bit more and let the warmth of her, the smell of dinner, the faint woodsmoke clinging to her collar, and the fragrant jasmine of her hair pull him out of the spiral he'd been drowning in.
"Nothing. Just missed you."
Eli could feel the heat blooming in Juli's cheeks.
"I only left for ten minutes! Y-You… I'm dramatic? You're more dramatic than me!"
He found it endearing how Juli could be so bold and smug when she made the first move, yet the moment Eli did the same, she tucked into herself, becoming shy and defenseless like a turtle pulling into its shell.
"They were the longest ten minutes of my life."
"Goodness!"
Juli finally wriggled a hand free enough to bonk her wrist against the back of his head.
"Off, off, off. I am holding dinner. I fought for this dinner. M-Move out the way, Elise! It's gonna spill at this rate!"
Eli chuckled, finally letting her go. She stiffly marched past him to the nightstand with a sigh, set both bowls down with care, and plopped down onto the bed.
The mattress dipped under her with a creak, and she immediately flopped backward across it like a starfish, her sword belt jingling against her thigh.
"I'm beat! Mmf. So soft…"
Eli huffed a small laugh and walked over to the nightstand to fetch the bowls. He passed one down to her, and Juli accepted it without sitting up, balancing the base with her stomach.
"Should I feed you?"
Juli froze with her bowl wobbling against her stomach. Her ears went a shade of pink visible even in the lamplight.
"…N-No."
"No?"
"No! I have hands, Elise. Two of them. Look!"
She wiggled both her arms at the ceiling before letting them flop back down. With a low grunt, Juli grabbed the bowl, dragging herself upright into a cross-legged position on the bedspread to balance the bowl on her thighs.
The first spoonful disappeared into her mouth before Eli had even sat down beside her.
"Mm. Mhmm. These humble inns always have the best food."
"Yeah. Now, scooch."
Juli scooted over, the bedspread dragging along with her rear.
Eli lowered himself onto the mattress, settling cross-legged with his back against the headboard. He pulled his own bowl into his lap and let the warmth seep through clay into his palms.
The trembling in his fingers had nearly stopped, though he could still feel a slight tremor whenever he tried to hold the spoon still.
For a few minutes, the only sound in the room was the soft clink of clay and spoon, and the occasional creak of the bed as Juli shifted to chase some stubborn potatoes around her bowl.
Eli turned to her as he chewed on the soft beef.
"Aren't you going to ask me what's happening?"
Juli paused, her spoon stopped halfway to her mouth. She put it down and glanced sideways at him, a look that was equal parts exasperation and fondness.
"You're someone who needs space when ruminating, Elise. Pushing you never works. You just clam up worse."
Juli scooped up potatoes with her spoon and then dropped them back into the bowl.
"Figured you would get to it eventually. And you did."
'Is that so?'
Apparently the real Elise was just like him when whenever something bothered her.
'Two peas in a very stubborn pod.'
Eli let out a small breath and lifted his eyes to meet Juli's.
"Yeah, well — I don't even know where to start."
Juli let her eyes linger on her face, and they softened into a smile.
"Do you remember when you came knocking at my door, begging me to teach you swordsmanship?"
'After Navia's death, yeah. Elise decided to break Navia's one and only rule the day she died.'
That was when their friendship bloomed; when Juli pulled Elise out of the abyss alongside Irene.
"…I remember."
Juli set her bowl down on the nightstand and shifted, draping her leg over his.
"You showed at my door at — what — two in the morning? Wooden sword in your hands. Your hair was a mess. Wouldn't even say hello. You just stood there and said, 'Teach me how to use this. Please.'"
She huffed a small laugh, her eyes softened even more.
"I tried to send you back to your room three times that night. Told you Her Ladyship explicitly banned you from holding a weapon. Told you Alfred would skin me alive if he found out. Told you to leave because you weren't thinking straight. I tried, you know."
"I didn't leave."
"Of course you didn't!"
Juli shook her head.
"You sat down on the cold floor outside my door and said you'd sleep there if I shut it on you. What do you mean, sleep there? Were you nuts!? In November, no less. With nothing but a nightgown!"
Eli huffed quietly. He could feel the imprint of that night through Elise's blue-tinted memory. But the cold of the stone wasn't as cold as her heart, the weight of the wooden sword across her knees wasn't as heavy as the sorrow she carried.
"So I caved," Juli went on. "Because what else was I gonna do? Leave you out there to freeze?"
She tilted her head at him.
"What I'm trying to say is — you've been here before. You know where to start."
"…I do?"
"You do. You always do, Elise. That night? You hadn't worked out anything in your head, like at all. You just knew you needed to start somewhere, and standing on my doorstep, asking me to teach you something Her Ladyship forbade…"
Juli leaned a little closer.
"…that was your start. Seriously! You couldn't have told me what you wanted to do with a sword if I'd held a knife to your throat. You didn't even talk for the first few days of practice."
She bloomed a light smile.
"But your determination, your grief... I could feel it. That was enough for both of us to figure out the rest from there."
Juli tipped her chin at him.
"Trust your gut, dummy. Just say the first thing that's on your mind. We'll figure out the rest, same as last time."