"Is this what university students in Thailand do during their break?"
"Yep!" Jettana said while knitting.
"Interesting,"
"Are you into fashion? Can you do this? Tell me first."
"I didn't choose this class when I had the chance. It seemed complicated."
"Want me to teach you? I'm good at it."
"Why do you always surprise me?" Marvis sat down next to the person who had come to his room with pastel-colored yarn. Since they had just started knitting, he still couldn't figure out what they were making-was it a hat, a scarf, or something else entirely?
He had no idea.
"First, you need to start by casting on stitches."
"Okay."
"Don't take this the wrong way, but I'm actually serious about teaching you."
"..."
"Sorry! I was just role-playing."
"Sigh."
"Alright, for real now!" The playful one finally got serious. Knitting wasn't hard, but it required patience, and Jettana was sure that once Marvis focused, he could finish a piece in a day.
After stopping by to hang out, help with some work, and discuss fabric patterns and fashion-something he knew a bit about-he realized that this guy was insanely talented. He was so passionate about his craft that even just standing there cutting fabric, he looked cool.
And no, he wasn't just saying that to flatter him.
"It's harder than I thought."
"What I'm doing now is called the knit stitch. The pattern I'm making is called garter stitch. There are other styles if you're interested, but this is the most basic."
"What should I knit?" Marvis's excited tone made Jettana smile.
"I'm knitting a scarf for my mom. What do you want to make? A scarf is easy; you don't have to shape it too much."
"A scarf sounds good. I'll probably need it when I go back to Seoul. By the way, is this Japanese yarn?"
"Yep! I bought it when I went to Kyoto with my family. There's a huge store there-you'd love it if you're into textiles and fabrics."
"Should I book a flight?"
"Calm down!" Jettana laughed, shifting the bag of colorful yarn so Marvis could pick one. He found it funny how they somehow ended up sitting together, knitting, and chatting. Before they knew it, it was already past noon, and neither of them had eaten.
Marvis was the one who volunteered to cook.
A true master chef.
Jettana was enjoying this.
"How about green curry spaghetti?"
"That's your go-to dish, huh? You keep making it, over and over!"
"Well, I don't like cooking rice. It's too much work."
"That's so weird."
"Do you want it or should we order something instead?"
"I'm fine with anything. I'm already grateful that you're cooking for me."
"It's nothing."
The room's owner got up from the sofa to grab ingredients from the fridge.
As he bent down to rummage through the shelves, Jamie swore his disloyal eyes were locked onto those fair cheeks without blinking.
Please.
Just stop.
"Jettana."
"..."
"What?"
"... "
"Why do you always wear such short shorts? It's messing with my head."
"They're comfortable," Marvis answered nonchalantly, looking down at his shorts that had ridden up quite high. He didn't care.
"You want me to pull them down?"
"Do you want to look?"
"Fine."
"Do you like it? My legs?"
"Idiot!" Marvis burst into laughter at Jamie's reaction-crossing his arms, turning away, and repeating idiot like a flustered heroine from a romance novel.
"You like kissing legs in bed too. Do you really love them that much, Jamie?"
"Stop teasing."
"Messing with you is way more fun than cooking."
Jamie held his breath as the other person casually sat on his lap-face to face, grinding his body against Jamie's lap. With those long legs and that playful expression, who even taught him to act like this?
Whoaaaa?!
"Are we ever going to eat? Why do you keep teasing?"
"I'm not. You're just overreacting."
"I can't help it! I have a weakness for nice legs, especially fair ones."
"Did I just turn you on?"
Jamie hated how he said that-with an innocent tilt of his head, furrowed brows like he was genuinely asking if he had done something wrong. And the other person who felt uncomfortable all over because he was being ground by his hips and lapped nonstop. Jamie was struggling to stay
composed as the teasing continued.
"At this rate, I might just have you before I have dinner, Marvis."
A warm hand slipped into the loose T-shirt, got soft and smooth skin, and inhaled the unique scent from the neck of the person who tilted his head to let him touch deeply. He pressed his lips on the soft shoulder that was exposed from the loose T-shirt, moved his hand down, pulled the edge of the other person's favorite shorts down, before gripping firmly-
Smack!
"Damn..."
Marvis inhaled sharply, whispering something provocative into Jamie's ear.
"Not taking them off completely. I want to see you squirm."
Marvis didn't know how he would suffer in the next minute, but the other person really did it after putting on a condom and bullying him who had his pants taken off, halfway. It was difficult to move up or down. Marvis was
caught, bullied like that. He was slamming and begging the other person to stop, Jamie holding his arm behind his back. And in the end, they never did get to eat that green curry spaghetti.
Round one ended on the sofa. The next round moved to the bed. And even after that, Jamie still wasn't done-continuing in the bathroom. It took some serious pleading before things finally stopped at round three.
By the time they were out looking for food at the mall near Jamie's condo, Marvis was exhausted, practically sulking while Jamie casually twirled his car keys, whistling like nothing had happened.
They settled for cold soba, playfully fighting over the wasabi instead of just asking for more.
"I'm starving."
"Well, whose fault is that?"
"You started it! I told you, I get worked up easily."
"Don't you think that was a bit much?"
"Are you sulking?"
"I'm not sulking; I'm just complaining."
"Complaining still sounds cute. I'll buy you some clothes to make it up."
"..."
"I can tell you like it."
"Anything would be fine?"
Jettana felt as if he could see cat ears popping up on the other person's curly
hair. He had asked the same thing before-why use such highlighted colors?
It turned out to be exactly what he thought. He liked Cruella de Vil from the cartoon 101 Dalmatians. Even though he didn't support the idea of using puppies to make fur coats, he loved her character, hair color, and fashion, so he decided to dye his hair like hers.
So cute, right?
That little brat. T_T
"Okay, fine. But this mall doesn't have Prada, Gucci, or Chanel. I'm just a regular student, so I can't spoil you too much."
"Who would be crazy enough to spend someone else's money on those brands?"
"Then I guess I'll just wait and see your skills at asking for shopping money."
He loved that.
That confident expression on the other person's face.
"Let's do it this way."
"What do you mean by 'this way'?"
After finishing a super late lunch at the Japanese restaurant, they walked out together. The shorter one pouted before playfully raising his fist and proposing,
"You choose for me, and I'll choose for you."
"That's so difficult!"
"It'll be fun, come on... just try."
"How can I not spoil you when you're this cute? And look at you clinging to my arm."
Marvis smiled, a melt-your-heart kind of smile. Jamie looked away, afraid of losing his composure even more... Am I really becoming a lovesick fool like that idiot?
No way.
I don't love him!
I've said it from the start!
"Let's go with this store; they have a lot of clothes."
"That's what I'm saying!"
"Whatever I choose, Jamie has to wear it."
"You have to wear it too. If I have to pick anything, no hesitation allowed."
"I can wear anything anyway."
"I believe that."
He really believed it because sometimes he saw Marvis wear women's clothes and somehow make them look unisex. That must be his special talent. But as everyone says, fashion has no gender.
"Honestly, I like this store; they play good music."
"Me too."
"Can you believe it? Since this song came out, it makes me think a lot. I don't even know why; I've never been heartbroken or anything."
"I like it too, but what's your favorite part?"
"I think it's crazy, but I hope that the fire we both made still burns a little in you."
Marvis, who was holding up a shirt to see if it fit Jamie, paused for a moment. If it had been anyone else, they might have sung along with the lyrics or the first line where the girl says something like, "I love you! You
silly, silly man, I love you!" But this was Jamie.
Jamie, who was one of a kind.
"Listening to it makes my heart drop; it's both hopeful and painful."
"That much, huh?" A small smile appeared on his cute face. Jamie wasn't quite sure what that meant.
"It's like... I hope that the old sparks will still ignite. I might just be talking randomly. Maybe we've never really been anything. We've never broken up or loved each other, but..."
"But I like such a sentimental way to groove. I hope it still touches you...baby, come back to me, come back to me."
"Wow-such a sentimental way to groove! This one sounds so thrilling."
The taller person knocked lightly, holding up a cropped top for girls against Marvis's body, only to get kicked away forcefully. It's not that he had never worn one, but this didn't look unisex at all, especially with the basic glittery print that said girl gang.
"Ouch!"
"You're such a drama queen."
"Wow, you know the term drama queen too?"
"I can choose now. Have you picked anything?"
"Hey, where is it? I don't see you grabbing anything."
"I'm not grabbing anything yet; I don't want to spoil the surprise."
"So, was that just a tease?"
"Uh-huh," Marvis replied quietly. Honestly, he had already seen a few outfits when they walked in, and with Jamie's body type, picking clothes wouldn't be difficult. Plus, the playful vibe of the other person matched the store's styles perfectly.
"I can't choose for you."
"..."
"Anything this beautiful person wears looks good on them, huh?"
He had received plenty of compliments before, but none made his heart flutter quite like when the other person picked up a black leather jacket and draped it over him, playfully calling him beautiful.
He knew that when Jamie called him beautiful, it meant something different from when others said it.
"If you wear that outfit on a date with any guy, I guarantee they'll be head over heels."
Because he sensed through their gaze... that Jamie saw him as a work of art, and it made him feel deeply cherished.
"Here it is! Something cute and sweet, like a Korean boy!"
"I usually don't touch earth tones, but this is cute."
"..."
"Thank you!" Jamie smiled sweetly before accepting the outfit he picked, which included loose straw-colored linen pants, a soft white T-shirt, and a mid-brown overlay set with a small belt.
"Wait here."
"Hey, where are you going?"
"To grab an outfit for you."
Jamie smiled, watching the slender back of the person walking away, attracting everyone's attention. Marvis carried charm wherever he went-his fair skin stood out, his unique face and twinkling eyes were irresistibly captivating. You could never trust him for even a minute. It wasn't long before some people returned with the outfit that Jamie had previously sworn he had never seen in his closet.
"Really?"
"Wear it with a suit! This green color is trending."
"Please."
"With some colorful Converse shoes and a polo shirt underneath... it would look so cute."
It was just like when that guy got excited talking about music.
It must be the same because when he saw the other person's eyes sparkle while talking about color combinations, fabric patterns, and fashion trends for next year and the years before, his heart raced every time.
Sigh.
—
"What are you up to, friend?"
"Don't stick your nose in."
"I'm going to slap your face!"
"..."
"What are you doing, walking around?"
"Just waiting. I'm going to have dinner with little Lily."
"Two times? Is Lily going to eat or what?"
"Big boobs, dude."
"You're ridiculous. I wish your mom knew."
"Should I bow down to your feet, then? Do you still have any humanity left?" Prasai shook his head, utterly exhausted by Jettana's antics. After staring at him for a while, he realized that Jettana had finally stopped rambling about that other person.
"You're not into that person anymore?Marvis, was it?"
"No way!"
"What does 'no way' mean? Are you in or out?"
"I'm not telling you."
"Then it must not be serious. I thought you were really into this one."
"I'm just young and want to have fun, but I don't want to be tied down."
"You're such a loser," Jettana snapped, turning to look at his friend like he wanted to rip him apart. He couldn't stand people like Jettana. Staring at him for a while, he thought, well, at least he's stopped obsessing over that person.
"Who cares what you think? A loser like you is probably going to be waiting until I'm dead before you get a girlfriend."
Sigh.
"Why do you want me to have a girlfriend so badly? I'm confused."
"I don't want you to have a girlfriend; I just want you to try being serious in a relationship. It's nice. Like with a wife. You see couples fighting all the time, but in the end, if you don't have someone by your side, you can't get through each day either."
"..."
"Or like that guy-Duang-he's happy every second of his life. I get that not everyone is lucky enough to find true love, but at least since we're here, can't we just wish for some good love for someone?"
"Wow, look who's getting philosophical."
"Ugh, my head hurts talking to you."
"I don't know, right now I feel grateful, but it's just gratitude."
"So how grateful do you have to be to actually do something?"
"And just liking someone isn't enough?"
"You'll find out soon enough if just liking someone is enough. Ugh, it's like talking to a wall."
"Are you scolding me, Mom?"
"Who's your mom, you idiot?" Jettana slumped onto the table, cursing like a machine gun. What the hell was he mad about? But really, was it true that he didn't like anyone that much?
But with Marvis...
"Sigh."
"Just sighing."
"That's why when Brother Deck from Big Ass wrote the song Playing with Heights, I wondered what he was thinking."
"He knew it was risky, but he probably just wanted to try."
"I don't know, it's complicated. I don't believe in love. I believe in sex. Just love for one day is enough."
"Whatever, you'll find out soon enough."
"I don't want to wait. I want to know now."
"You go on ahead, then. Go find that little Lily or whatever."
"Right, it's time to run away. Here comes the candle vase."
"Annoying idiot."
Here we go again.
Jettana walked out of his close friend's room, jingling his car keys.
Sometimes he felt lonely. He had already said that he liked the colorful lights, having friends around, wanting someone to talk to. He didn't want to be alone. He hardly ever stayed in his own room. The reason he moved into the dorm during his first year was that he wanted to have lots of people to
talk to. At least when he showered in the communal bathroom, he could meet this person or that one. But after finishing his first year, he had enough. He moved out.
It was too inconvenient.
Heh heh.
[Jettana, I'm done getting ready!]
"Okay, okay. I'm on my way!"
[Okay, wearing the pink outfit as requested.]
"Wow, who can resist that?"
He loved it.
That pink outfit.
"See you soon! Call me when you get there."
[Okay, hurry up! I miss you!]
He hung up before driving off. Actually, his friend's dorm and that of his buddy weren't too far apart, but with one-way streets, he had to go around the world and back. But hey, for sex, he could manage it.
As Jettana drove a short distance, his phone, which he had placed on the
passenger seat, vibrated. He hit the brakes for a red light, wondering who could be calling. But when he saw the name saved in his contacts, he answered, switched to speakerphone, and placed the phone on his lap.
It was the pretty one calling. Yes, that beautiful person.
"Hello! Let's take a break and drink some cold water first."
[Why do you have to be funny everywhere?]
"What's up, gorgeous?"
Marvis was still laughing on the other end. The lively sounds made Jettana wonder where he was. But when he heard the music floating through the call periodically, he guessed he was probably at a concert.
"Are you at a concert?"
[Actually, I'm on a date.]
"And you call me? Did your date bite their tongue off or something?"
[Wearing the outfit you picked for me, too.]
"Send me a picture. I want to see if it looks cute."
[You should come and see for yourself, I guess.]
"Don't be mean right now. I don't have a ticket, and I have an appointment too!"
[Rude.]
"Don't act all sad now." Jettana pretended to scold the person on the other end, but they kept laughing. He wondered if they were drunk. A concert like this had to have some beer involved, and it seemed like the band hadn't even come on stage yet.
[Seriously, don't you know whose concert it is today?]
"Who is it? I haven't been updated much lately, but during the semester, I went a lot with friends and my friend's boyfriend, who studies music."
[I remember... but today it's Tom Misch's concert.]
"What the..."
Jamie cursed.
[Do you believe me? He's going to play the song Movie first.]
"Hey, why didn't I know? This sucks."
[You're too late. The tickets are all sold out. We thought you would know.]
"Ugh, I want to cry."
[That's why I called... so we can listen to Movie together, right?]
Jamie hold the steering wheel tightly. It's a feeling that rises in the chest, similar to the sensation he felt the first time he heard the line, "I hope that the fire we both made still burns a little in you." Sometimes Marvis makes him think of a romantic movie where the male lead says to the female lead,
"It would be privileged to have my heart broken by you."
Getting your heart broken by you is a weird kind of privilege for me, but who actually wants to be heartbroken?
"Do you really have to act cute like this?"
[I'm not doing it for Jamie.]
"..."
[I'm doing it for myself. Because if Jamie hears it and feels happy, then I'll be happy too.]
The feeling lingered as he watched the sunset slowly sinking, leaving an orange glow in the sky. He parked the car not far from his destination but didn't call someone like he said he would when he arrived.
Maybe it was because he wanted to listen to that song. "Then you hold your phone. I'll sit here and listen quietly."
[Okay.]
And Marvis really did that.
He heard the cute person turn to talk to their date, a mix of Thai and English. Some of it he understood, some he didn't, but he thought they looked like they were getting along well. To be honest, he didn't want to be another person who broke Marvis's heart, and he knew if they really reached that point, he wouldn't be that cruel person who hurt Marvis.
Jamie tapped his fingers on the steering wheel rhythmically. The opening band was an indie group that his friend had been obsessed with for a while.
He could sing along to some songs and heard Marvis's bright laughter, making him imagine himself as the fool protagonist in a romantic movie, only able to watch the female lead from a distance at the concert.
The female lead who was with someone else.
[They're coming.]
"I know."
A faint smile appeared on Jettana's face. He smiled at the last rays of light, which rose along with the familiar voice of a woman. Of course, he had listened to this song throughout 2019 and was still playing it in 2020.
"My cheek brushes against his... smooth on stubble for a moment."
"And then it's gone. He walks along the platforms into the dream; every fiber in me wants to shout and scream."
He said the next line as if it slipped out because Marvis was doing it too.
[Stop.]
"Stop."
"To run across to him, to take him in my arms... to tell him, I love you! You silly, silly man, I love you!"
It was strange how just calling felt as if they were standing next to each other at the concert.
There was no one else there-just him, Marvis, Tom Misch, and the dim lights. In his head, they weren't holding hands; they were just standing beside each other, diving into the song and singing the first line together.
"I hope that the fire we both made still burns a little in you."
[I hope that the fire we both made still burns a little in you.]
Even though we are actually in different places, Marvis is with a guy.
"Jettana, you're here and didn't tell me! Good thing I came to wait."
"..."
"Oh, are you on the phone? Sorry for coming in without letting you know first."
He was in the car with another girl.
[Remember me fresh out of a black-and-white movie, movie.]
It was at that moment that something happened in his heart... a black-and-white image similar to that of a sad love song while some music still played from the speakers because Marvis hadn't stopped the track.
"Jett?"
At that moment, he kept asking himself-was it really Mars?
[On every screen... what would you realize what you meant to me, or was it a mystery?]
How far away was it?
—
"Marvis!!!"
"Don't give me that cute face."
"I didn't..."
"And no speaking English! Or Korean! Not all of it!" Plaplueng, who had just finished some business upcountry and stopped by to see her friend at the condo, held a blue toothbrush she had never seen before because aside from her, no one else had permission to stay over.
"Whose is it?!"
"Oh."
Sometimes she hated how he responded casually as if it weren't a big deal.
What was her crazy friend thinking?
She wanted to be really mad, but just look at those big eyes. Who could actually do that?
"It's Jamie's."
"Seriously? That kid?"
"Uh-huh."
"So, what's next?"
"I can't say, but right now, we're bed buddies."
"Mar."
"You're so loud."
Plaplueng flopped down onto the same sofa as her close friend before folding the MacBook screen that Marvis was scrolling through and grabbing that soft hand, speaking in a serious tone.
"I told you not to break anyone's heart."
"He doesn't love me. Jamie said it himself."
"Ugh, then what do you like about that kid?"
"Everything."
"Marvis!"
"It's true." He replied lazily before sliding down to lie on the pile of pillows on the sofa like a lazy cat. Plaplueng rubbed her temples, having already said that no one could control her friend. He was too good at doing whatever he wanted.
"I didn't plan for it to be like this, but it has happened."
"Where did you learn to say things like that, you?"
"Well, it's good... I really like Jamie. I like him a lot."
"Oh my, you've gotten to this point, Mar."
"I'm just being honest."
"So you brought him to sleep in your room?"
"Uh-huh, we're pretty close now."
"So you two are doing things in this room?"
"Yeah, this sofa too."
"My goodness!"
"Don't make it a big deal."
"Come on, we're adults here."
"This is why everyone calls Plaplueng 'Mom.'"
"Ugh." The one being scolded didn't argue back and went to open the fridge to find a drink to cool off, but found a homemade lemonade inside instead.
"Did you buy this, Mar?"
"Nope, Jamie made it for me."
"Now I understand why you like him so much."
"Right? Cold hands, warm heart."
He said that people with cold hands or cool tempers should bake, which is true. After trying to make stuffed donuts the other day, he knew he couldn't do it again. It was a delicate task and required a lot of patience. Can you believe it? A guy like Jamie, who often complains, turns out to be calm and
really great at baking.
So ridiculous.
"Isn't he ideal?"
"I still can't say for sure."
"I guess you'll be moving to Thailand permanently soon."
"You're just talking." Marvis left the comfy sofa to check his phone, responding to messages from friends at university, his parents, and of course, Jamie, who had just woken up. He saw that Jamie went to watch a football match with friends from university.
He knew a few of them.
Duang, Qin, Pae.
"You'll know whether you love him or not, Mar."
But he had never met them.
"Love is so tricky." Plaplueng smiled before ruffling her friend's hair as Marvis picked up his phone to call someone. The conversation was a long one in English, and she could tell he was definitely talking to that kid, which made her heart race.
Marvis and love.
Oh wow, just thinking about it made her heart flutter, even though she wasn't sure if it would actually happen. But who knows?
"Are you at the condo? Do you have a place in Nakhon Pathom?"
[Yes, it's because that idiot Pae doesn't know what he's doing. He won't go to the bar near our place and has to come all the way to the university. Maybe he misses his friends. Have you eaten yet?]
"I've eaten. I'm with friends too."
[Are you going to eat Omakase later? My treat!]
"Where did you get the money?"
[I know, hold on. I got the football.]
"Can I call the police on you?"
[You're so bad!!]
"Haha, okay, I'll go." Marvis laughed, squinting his eyes. Plaplueng couldn't
help but eavesdrop and observe her friend's behavior. Normally, he was quite a cheerful person, but now he was laughing and smiling easily about everything.
"Okay, see you at six. I'll get dressed and wait."
[I'll make sure to dress like a handsome guy, okay? Like the coolest version of me.]
"Coolest version... Are you jealous?"
[Hey, why are you so good at this, Marvis?]
"I'm learning a lot from you, dude."
[Yeah, you've always been great.]
They talked for a little while, and Jamie asked him to be the one to hang up the call. Marvis then caught the teasing gaze of his close friend, which made him unable to stop himself from asking in a higher voice,
"What?"
"You sound like you're dating, not just bed buddies."
"But I can fuck another."
"But the point is you don't, right?"
"..."
"You're feeling flustered."
"I don't understand."
"It's exactly how you are right now-nervous. That's what they call feeling flustered." Plaplueng smirked.
"He's not a boyfriend... not yet."
"But he's cute! The way you two talk is adorable, not just for fun."
"Ugh." The cute one grumbled in displeasure, wondering why he had to be
teased.
"So what's the deal?"
"Well, being bed buddies is kind of like being friends too."
"Whatever you say. I'll just wait and see."
"..."
Marvis leaned back against the soft sofa, avoiding eye contact with his close friend because he didn't want to think too far ahead.
"Love is so tricky. I repeat it, Marvis :)"
But he couldn't help but think about it anyway.