The Great Revolution was postponed by a double-serving of spicy pork and a bucket of cheesy fries.
By the time Choi Ha-Niel and Park Ji-Ah had finished their "War Room" session in the cafeteria the day before, they hadn't started a rebellion—they had started a nap. The food coma had been so severe that Ha-Niel had practically crawled into her bed at 6 PM, while Ji-Ah had fallen asleep on her textbook, waking up with "Intro to Sociology" printed backward on her forehead.
But today? Today, the sun was out, the caffeine was kicking in, and the mission was back on.
"Target identified," Ji-Ah whispered, ducking behind a giant stone pillar near the Faculty Building.
Professor Lee Young-Ae walked out of the building. She looked like a fresh breeze in a world of humid chaos—simple black slacks, a crisp white blouse, and a stack of papers held against her chest. She didn't walk; she glided.
"She's so... literary," Ha-Niel whispered, hiding behind a recycling bin. "Look at the way she ignores everyone. My brother is exactly like that. It's like they're the same species of 'Too Cool for This Planet'."
"Operation: Follow the Queen is a go," Ji-Ah signaled.
What followed was the most uncoordinated, hilarious chase in the history of Hankuk University.
When Professor Lee stopped to look at a bulletin board, Ha-Niel and Ji-Ah performed a synchronized dive into a nearby bush.
CRUNCH.
"My Gucci loafers!" Ji-Ah hissed, untangling a twig from her shoe.
"Shh! She's moving!"
They followed her through the central plaza. When the Professor turned around to check her watch, the two girls froze in place. Ha-Niel pretended to be a statue of a "Stressed Student," and Ji-Ah tried to blend into a lamp post.
Meanwhile, a group of freshmen passing by stopped and stared.
"Are those girls okay?" one student whispered, pointing at Ji-Ah, who was currently trying to look like a gargoyle[1].
"I think they're doing a TikTok trend," his friend replied, shaking his head. "Or they've finally snapped from the midterm stress. Don't make eye contact, just keep walking."
Amazingly, the Ice Queen didn't notice—or perhaps she was used to students acting weird.
"Why is she walking so fast?" Ha-Niel panted, her glasses sliding down her nose. "Does she have a marathon to catch? My legs weren't built for this, Ji-Ah. I'm a strategic thinker, not a track star!"
"She's heading for the Humanities Pond," Ji-Ah noted, crawling behind a row of flower pots. "Maybe she's going to read poetry? Very romantic. Very 'New Mom' vibes."
They watched from behind a weeping willow tree as Professor Lee sat on a bench. She pulled out her phone. She was smiling.
"She's smiling!" Ha-Niel gripped Ji-Ah's arm. "Is she looking at a photo of a cat? Or maybe a vintage edition of Shakespeare? If she likes old things, she'll love Do-Yun-oppa's 'Ahjussi' fashion sense!"
Suddenly, a sleek, silver SUV pulled up to the curb. A man stepped out. He wasn't a celebrity, but he was undeniably handsome—sharp suit, warm smile, and the kind of "stable energy" that screams I have my life together.
Professor Lee stood up. Her "Ice Queen" mask didn't just melt; it evaporated. She practically glowed.
"Wait," Ji-Ah squinted. "Who is that? Is that her brother? A cousin? A very handsome Uber driver?"
The man walked up to the Professor, tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, and kissed her forehead. Then, he held up his hand—the same hand she took—and the sunlight caught a massive, unmistakable diamond ring on her finger.
"Engaged," Ha-Niel whispered, her voice cracking. "She's... she's spoken for."
"She's not just spoken for," Ji-Ah groaned, slumping against the tree. "Look at the way he's opening the car door for her. That's a five-year relationship minimum. Hani, our 'Ice Queen' has a King."
The SUV drove off, leaving the two "spies" standing in the dirt, covered in leaves and shame.
"Ji-Ah," Ha-Niel said, turning to her friend. "You told me she was single. You explicitly said she gave that idol a 'C' because she was an independent, single woman who didn't care about romance!"
"I didn't say she was single!" Ji-Ah defended, dusting off her skirt. "I said she liked quiet nights! For all I knew, she liked them with a fiancé! You're the one who said she was 'Fit Candidate' material!"
"I based that on your gossip!" Ha-Niel shouted (quietly). "You're the 'Socialite'! You're supposed to know who is dating who! We spent two hours in a bush for a woman who is probably picking out wedding flowers right now!"
"At least we didn't bring your brother," Ji-Ah muttered. "Can you imagine? 'Oppa, meet this beautiful Professor. Oh wait, meet her fiancé, he's a neurosurgeon and he's taller than you'."
Ha-Niel leaned her head against the tree bark. "My brother is at home right now, probably eating vitamins and staring at a wall, and I just wasted the morning following a happily engaged woman. CEO Park is winning, Ji-Ah. The five-year plan is winning by default because we're idiots."
"We aren't idiots," Ji-Ah said, grabbing Ha-Niel's hand. "We just had a bad first draft. Every great movie has a failed pilot. We need a new target. Someone who is definitely single. Someone who isn't a Professor."
"And someone who doesn't drive a silver SUV," Ha-Niel added. "Come on. Let's go get more spicy pork. I need to eat my feelings before we plan the next ambush."
[1] A gargoyle is a carved stone figure, often grotesque or monstrous, that projects from the roof gutter of a building—particularly in Gothic architecture—to act as a waterspout, throwing rain water away from the masonry to prevent erosion