Chapter 53: Flandre: I Want to Sleep with Big Brother Tonight.
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The magic books Kihara gave to Patchouli were thank-you gifts from various familias in Orario. He hadn't checked their contents beforehand because they were single-use items — once read, they would turn into ordinary, useless books.
The moment he heard the rather chuuni-sounding title, Kihara's body tensed. Without hesitation, he snatched the book from Patchouli's hands and inspected it.
"It's just a slightly edgy name. The actual effect is releasing a black mist that blocks detection and vision."
"Eh? You can actually read these otherworld characters?"
"Huh? You can't?"
Patchouli and Kihara stared at each other in mutual confusion. Only then did Kihara realize that his language comprehension ability allowed him to read the magic books without any difficulty.
After explaining the situation, the burning enthusiasm that lit up in Patchouli's eyes made Kihara feel like he was being targeted by a mad scientist. He instinctively took two steps back in fear.
"Patchouli, I'm a married man. I sell my skills, not my body. I'm not going to help you translate dangerous books!"
"I-I never said I wanted you to do anything that dangerous…"
"Then why did you turn your head away guiltily? Hmm? Look me in the eyes, you wicked woman!"
Kihara's intense, oppressive gaze made cold sweat bead on Patchouli's forehead. Feeling his breath getting closer, she finally admitted honestly, "Sorry… I did think about it for a moment."
"See? It's better to admit it honestly from the start. We can talk about the translation later. First, teach me magic!"
"Eh?"
She blinked cutely, thinking she had misheard. "You're really willing to help me translate ancient books?"
"Of course. But… it'll cost extra!"
Kihara's gaze quickly swept over Patchouli's delicate figure hidden beneath her oversized nightgown. His dark eyes sparkled brightly in the dim underground library.
If I remember correctly, Patchouli is actually hiding quite the impressive bust…
[Wait a second, Master. I can't just ignore that comment. Has Hestia been smashing your brain with her massive assets every day? You're now openly eyeing giant breasts right in front of me. I might need to use the demon blade to fix that head of yours!]
Patchouli was too caught up in the joy of having help with translation to notice his scheming gaze. "Money is no issue as long as you're willing to help. Then let's begin your magic training right away!"
Getting back to business, Kihara set aside his wandering thoughts. "Alright, I'll be in your care!"
"Magic is essentially the manipulation of elements in the air…"
Patchouli had a very typical scholarly teaching style. She believed that only after thoroughly understanding the theory could one avoid mistakes during practice. So for Kihara's very first magic lesson, she spent over an hour passionately explaining the fundamentals of mana and elements.
Theory classes were always the most hypnotic. Fortunately, his teacher was a soft-spoken beautiful girl. The combination of visual and auditory appeal easily overcame drowsiness, allowing Kihara to absorb everything Patchouli said.
"The theory is finished. Now, try sensing the mana as I described."
Kihara wore an expression that said "I knew it would be like this." Considering Patchouli had never taught anyone before, he hadn't held high expectations for her teaching ability anyway. He closed his eyes and began meditating according to the theory.
Before long, Patchouli sensed the elements and mana around him beginning to resonate. Achieving this step meant he had officially stepped through the door of magic.
However, Kihara's situation was slightly different from what she expected. Normally, after resonance, one would absorb the mana into the body, refine and convert it, then store it internally.
Yet after half an hour, the mana simply circulated inside Kihara's body without any sign of being absorbed or stored.
"Strange… Sensing mana and elements so easily proves his aptitude isn't bad. Why can't he absorb it?"
After repeatedly failing to convert the mana, Kihara opened his eyes helplessly. "I can feel the mana, but I can't turn it into my own. It just keeps running around inside my body."
"Hmm…"
Patchouli closed the Basic Magic book in her hands and fell into deep thought. After a long while, she said, "You should head back for now. Leave this problem to me. As your teacher, I can't let the student handle every issue alone."
"Thanks for the trouble. And remember to take care of your health too."
"Mm."
Having finally gotten the chance to learn magic only to fail at the mana conversion stage, Kihara felt somewhat dejected. As he left the library, the elegant chief maid appeared at the end of the corridor.
"Mr. Kihara, the young mistress invites you to afternoon tea."
"Can she and Flandre already ignore sunlight?"
"Not completely immune, which is why I've set up a very large parasol."
"Please lead the way."
"Follow me."
In the flower-surrounded green lawn, Remilia sat gracefully beneath the huge parasol, sipping red tea. When she saw Kihara following Sakuya over, Flandre waved excitedly while holding two cream puffs.
"Big brother! These things called cream puffs are so delicious!"
Kihara was genuinely surprised. "You two can already eat human food?"
"Not bad."
Remilia elegantly set down her teacup, a nostalgic look crossing her face. "It's been… such a long time since I last tasted anything like this."
After becoming a vampire, Remilia's previous meals had always been specially prepared by Sakuya — black tea and jelly mixed with Type B blood.
Other foods weren't inedible to her, but they tasted like chewing wax and held no appeal, so she never bothered.
"I'll give you some praise. You managed to overcome the weaknesses of us vampires and even produce such delicious blood."
"Mhm mhm! Big brother, I like you!"
Flandre quickly stuffed the cream puff into her small mouth, puffing out her cheeks like a chipmunk, then dashed straight into Kihara's arms.
"Wait, why do you always climb into his lap the moment Kihara arrives?!"
Remilia frowned in dissatisfaction.
"Hm? Because… when big brother holds Flan… Flan feels really happy."
"Then what about me? Don't you feel happy when I hold you while we sleep?"
Flandre recalled the painful memory of being used as a body pillow and having her neck squeezed by her sister. She shook her head vigorously. "Big sister always squeezes Flan too tightly. It's uncomfortable."
Remilia looked puzzled. "Did that really happen? How come I don't know about it? Sakuya, are you aware of this?"
As the ever-loyal chief maid of the Scarlet Devil Mansion, Sakuya prioritized preserving her young mistress's precarious dignity over telling the truth. She immediately put on a serious face and spoke with perfect composure.
"There's no such thing, young mistress. You always sleep very quietly. Perhaps because you haven't slept with the second young mistress for a long time, you held her a bit too closely and gave her a nightmare."
"Uuu! Sakuya, you're taking sides!"
Flandre puffed out her cheeks angrily and hugged Kihara tighter. "Today I'm sleeping with big brother! I'm not sleeping with big sister anymore!"
....
Thank you for reading.
(T/N: Guys.... I'm currently out of town, so daily chapter is not guaranteed till Monday...)