Publication from the popular section "Herald of Progress" of the information space of the USSR (Material for textbooks. Approved by the analytical department "CERBER". Approved by the "Defense Aspect" committee for working with personnel. Approved by the chief coordinator D. S. Sechenov).
...Meanwhile, events in the Hegemony were developing rapidly. Within five to seven hours of the start of hostilities, news of the attack reached the scattered Batarian fleets on the outskirts. The unknown enemy struck precisely, methodically, as if knowing all the weak points.
If communications had not been failing, the fleets would have requested instructions from Khar'shan. But instead, each admiral received an individual message, carefully prepared, based on his personality, fears, ambitions, and past decisions.
Some were told the truth. Others – that the Hierarchy had attacked their world. A third group was shown footage of the orbital bombardment of their home planet, and all channels broadcast the execution of the Hegemon and his government by "rebellious slaves" to the applause of the rebels.
Soviet science knew no defeats. Even with minimal data, psychologists and analysts dissected each Hegemony admiral as if from a textbook, compiling his behavioral portrait.
The Red Fleet did not play by their foolish "knightly" rules. Ships did not line up for an "honorable battle." The USSR forces destroyed the enemy. Against pirates, slave owners, and oppressors – all means are good. Bourgeois naval commanders were used to fighting in a template manner; against the scientific approach of the Union, they could do little, especially when the proletarian hammer was already raised above their heads.
One after another, Hegemony ships jumped through relays, heading straight into traps. Some were blown to pieces by mines, others were sucked into star coronas, and still others ran into artillery ambushes. Those who survived were taken prisoner.
Soviet cosmonauts knew: there is no crueler punishment for a slave owner than a people's court. On Earth, they had already broken the backs of the "celestials," turning history into a New Era, exalting science and labor. Now it was the turn of the stellar oppressors.
Thanks to the brilliant work of the General Staff and the intelligence activities of CERBER, the forces of bourgeois darkness were dealt a terrible blow! Thanks to the heroism of Soviet scouts, who were the first to penetrate the lair, such impressive results were achieved.
As the Marshal of Intelligence, Comrade Mordakon, said:
"Capitalism became too confident in its exceptional power. Having nothing behind them but the remnants of the bourgeois era – money, they do not expect disobedience from the oppressed classes of the population. Moreover, their minds cannot imagine a country where the powerful do not play hypocritical games, imitating them, but respond to a blow with an all-crushing storm of popular wrath."
While the Citadel Space Council hastily tried to develop a strategy, and the people's armies continued their campaign, CERBER continued to strike the enemy of all progressive forces in its lair. Hundreds of "Argentum" operatives, deployed in the territory of the ideological enemy, were preparing to carry out a total act of retribution!
The people's wrath must reach all those stained. Criminals who decided they could enslave sentient beings with impunity must be completely and unconditionally destroyed, comrades! There are no statutes of limitations for crimes against reason!
Glory to the Soviet Union! Glory to CERBER! Honor and glory to the fighters of the Defense Aspect!
Fragment of a news broadcast. Extranet.
"...Our viewers are asking about a supposedly alternative method of interstellar travel," the host continued, stretching her words slightly, as if anticipating the expert's reaction.
"It's unscientific nonsense for now!" the Salarian scientist interrupted her sharply, his voice sounding harsh, almost irritated. "All such assumptions lack a clear evidence base. No calculations, no experimental data – nothing! Without at least fragments of the technology, we cannot make any substantiated statements. And all these discussions about alternatives to relays are pure speculation!"
The host tilted her head slightly, a barely perceptible smile touching her bluish lips.
"However, theories exist..."
"Theories?" the Salarian snorted. "Fantasies about quantum tunnels or 'natural corridors' don't even hold up to basic scrutiny. If someone has a working model – let them show it. Until then – it's just fairy tales for those who don't understand how the galaxy works."
A brief pause hung in the studio, as if even the operators froze for a moment. Then the host smoothly changed the subject, but for a few more seconds, the inscription "The expert's opinion is not final" flashed in the corner of the screen.
Blogger's broadcast from the Extranet.
"Hello, galaxy!" the Asari maiden drawled languidly, writhing on a bed that shimmered with the reflections of the shallow waters of Tassia's azure seas. Her voice sounded as if she had just woken up from a particularly successful orgy – languid, slightly hoarse, and with a tremor of pleasant fatigue. "All the Extranet news channellies are literally bursting with sensational news! And no, it's not another porn scandal... although, who knows, it depends on how you look at it?"
She lazily rolled onto her side, allowing the camera to capture the curves of her body, barely covered by what was formally called a "swimsuit," but in fact consisted of two narrow strips of fabric, strategically placed just enough to prevent the Extranet censors from banning the broadcast.
"While the politicians are feeding us analytical... " the Asari deliberately held her gaze on the camera before slowly running her tongue over her lips. "...the Hegemony got something bigger. And harder. In short, the Batarians got screwed!"
She feigned embarrassment, covering her mouth with an elegant hand, as if the accidentally slipped word "screwed" was an unfortunate oversight.
"As our boring but very meticulous tabloid friends report, this morning into the poor, defenseless Hegemony... they entered. Yes, that's right, they entered. Suddenly, sharply, without warning, and, apparently, without lubrication. In the amount of a whole fleet."
Her leg twitched, scattering petals of exotic flowers across the bed, which glittered like drops of mercury.
"The Batarian domain was taken dirty, from behind, right into all the holes, and with an apparatus steaming with arousal, so daring that even a Krogan would have choked with envy!"
She feigned a sigh, running her fingers along her own thigh, indicating the size of that very apparatus, which for some races was comparable to a third leg.
"And you know what? The economy from such pressure... nervously sat on a bottle. The credit index dropped by two points, and I had to pawn all my clothes. Now I'm freezing... but does it matter when such things are happening in the galaxy? You, dear viewers, will warm me with your love?"
Her lips twitched into a crooked grin, promising pleasure.
"The Citadel Council, having taken something forbidden (and I know what I'm talking about), decided to help. Alas, not to join the fun, but to break it up. But..."
A pause. A look into the camera, with a sharp, razor-like hint.
"Just arrived: one Hegemony fleet, apparently mistaking friends for enemies, had a 'cultural exchange' with the Turians. Well, you understand... 'Cultural exchange' is when they shoot, 'diplomatic protocol of the third degree' is when they bomb everything that moves... Naturally, the Primarch was excited, in full delight, loving the Citadel Council so much that it's still dripping..."
She stretched, displaying every curve of her body.
"That's all for now, my sinful viewers. But if you're not full of politics..."
Her voice became quieter, and her lips almost touched the microphone, almost committing an indecency with it.
"...in my private, for subscribers, I have a Hegemon costume. And very, very inappropriate behavior. You will punish me, such a disobedient one? Put pluses. Subscribe. And remember: war is war, but pleasure should be... regular."
The broadcast went dark, leaving only a flickering inscription:
"Special thanks to the sponsor – the company 'SubSos'! 'SubSos' – surprise your partner... down to the tonsils. Only at 'SubSos' in the catalog – vibro-dildos and expanders for Krogans..."
From the financial observer of the Citadel Space market.
Against the backdrop of hostilities in the Hegemony, intergalactic markets reacted with sharp fluctuations. Industrial stocks fell by 10 points, with mining and logistics corporations suffering particularly. At the same time, the arms sector shows record growth – shares of leading military manufacturers increased by 7-12% due to increased demand.
Due to disruptions in the Extranet segment related to the conflict, the Intergalactic Exchange suspends trading until further orders from the Citadel Council. Short positions on Batarian assets have become extremely risky, and transactions in the region are delayed.
Experts recommend reallocating investments to the defense sector and raw materials, avoiding investments in Batarian assets.
Update: Turian palladium futures rose by 3% in the last hour.
Forum transcript... Extranet. Compiled by senior analyst...
Legionary from Legionaries: ...I didn't even have time to say a word according to protocol, when they showered us with choice curses, simultaneously firing the "Pride of Vo'Rsha" GKC directly at the lead cruiser. Fortunately, their hull was of old construction. If they had come closer, the hit would not have been glancing. After that, our squadron gave a coordinated salvo. We were lucky that they came out of the relay in small groups, otherwise, we would have been wiped out before the main fleet forces arrived.
Brutal Male: AHAHHA! They must have shat themselves so badly! I knew they sold their last brains for their greed, but for things to be this bad in the Hegemony! I can even understand them – the death was glorious, just stupid, like a puffball's dick.
Tessian Tenderheart: I didn't think I'd ever agree with Male, but it's really stupid. I just don't believe that those who plundered our colonies for decades died so discourteously, believing such blatant lies out of thin air!
Legionary from Legionaries: The officers say that not everything was so simple. Even the logs of the information buoys were faked. Such attention to detail is only found with hackers from GOR. They even perfectly faked the signature of our ships. If I hadn't seen them with my own eyes standing in the hangars, I would have believed it myself. A cunning enemy.
Tessian Tenderheart: I agree. In our Republic, propaganda has already begun. Information is being released on local channels that this will not end just like that. On this wave, the flow of girls enlisting in the military has increased many times over. Some have even begun to criticize the matriarchs. I don't believe I'm saying this, but it would be better if they shook their asses on a pole! Both of them!
Citadel Wind: I can also say a lot about propaganda. Hello everyone!
From everyone: Hello!
Tessian Tenderheart: I didn't expect to see you! I thought you were on a direct flight to your historical homeland.
Brutal Male: Likewise, doll. Spill it, four-eyes, what's what?
Citadel Wind: I'd rather gouge out all my eyes than fly to the Hegemony. My family is not in favor of the old order that was actively imposed there. We remember what it was like to live as slaves. Especially serfs... And most of the Batarians living in Space share the same views and remember it with a shudder. There are, of course, idiots, but all races have them.
Brutal Male: You seem to be speaking logically, but it feels like you're shitting on us. You, our cop, don't beat around the bush like our tenderheart, but hit straight! What's happening in the Citadel?
Tessian Tenderheart: Ruffian!
Brutal Male: But I'm awesome!
Admin. Punisher from Rannoch: Stop the shit! I'll ban both of you for a day! I'm curious myself.
Brutal Male: Scary suit! That's it, I'm shutting up. Sorry, Wind and Tenderheart. We're celebrating with the guys. Had a little drink.
Citadel Wind: I know your "little drink"... It's unclear in the Citadel. Only half a day has passed. The Council hasn't really said yes or no yet, as it was only preliminary. Therefore, the politicians haven't received their talking points yet. Heh-heh. It's just that in our community, things have become more active. I didn't know we had so many jingoistic patriots, it's embarrassing. We even have them in our precinct. In the morning, there was no accent, now it's broken through. Had to correct them. They were beaten with the Turians in the shower. It's because of people like them that the hysteria on the net has risen. They made shitty videos, their shitty blogs spread them, and the Volus are happy, only. Prices have risen before our eyes!
But I came here to say something else. My aunt called me from there. She volunteered at a republican fund. Helps buy out slaves. So, the colony where she is now was taken in a couple of hours. No one was beaten, robbed, or raped. They just came, buried the planters, literally, freed the slaves, and left, leaving an administration of locals.
They met with Aunt. Talked. They clarified everything about how the process of returning slaves was organized. Aunt was taken through the filtration point. They showed her how and what they were going to feed the former slaves, treat them, how to rehabilitate them, even teach them something if they wanted! Almost saints, if they weren't creepy!
Aunt said they talk little among themselves, their faces are stone, and their synchronicity is like CNC machines. And they love order. And there's no need to talk about them being quick to punish. But they brought order. In general, it's unclear, but interesting.
Admin. Punisher from Rannoch: It's true about the slaves. Either someone from ours contacted the Fleet, or someone from some fund, but the captain said that a list was sent to the Admirals of who was found and freed from our people in the Hegemony. And they seem to be deciding how to hand them over. I don't know about the latter, I haven't seen it, but there was a lot of commotion.
Tessian Tenderheart: Interesting...
From the official address of the Council.
"...we have received official confirmation: the occupied world was subjected to orbital bombardment using nuclear weapons. The video broadcast by the invasion forces themselves into the Hegemony is clear evidence of their cruelty and barbarism! Executions and reprisals in the occupied territories are taking on a mass, systematic character."
Councilor Tevos took a sip of water from her glass, pausing briefly.
"According to the calculations of judicial experts, who are documenting all crimes, at present, more than two million subjects of the Hegemony have become victims, which is the largest act of genocide of the new era..."
Fragment of the news program "Vremya." Announcer: B.Ya. Ryabina; Correspondent: Kh.U. Lisunova. People's Network of the USSR (Appendix to the transcript of the Citadel Space Council's address)
"...At present, the forces of the combined corps have managed to drive the enemy out of the main industrial worlds of the Hegemony, depriving the slave regime's army of stable supplies. The captured facilities were subjected to precision bombing to prevent the restoration of the capitalist regime's industrial potential in the shortest possible time."
The correspondent looked confidently into the camera lens, and only the twitching of the ear tips of a rare fox-like wolfhednar betrayed her excitement.
"Was the civilian population evacuated before the strike?" asked the announcer from the Moscow studio in Ostankino.
The sentient fox, with a slight delay, answered, after consulting her notes on the tablet:
"Yes, the evacuation was carried out in full, which explains the increase in losses of the ground forces of the corps. But civilian casualties could not be avoided. According to preliminary estimates, about one hundred and fifty thousand free subjects died in the first eleven hours from the moment the retaliatory strike began. Of these, most died after a downed Hegemony ship fell on one of the cities. The total losses of the Hegemony, including military, are one million three hundred and forty-two thousand three hundred and twenty-three sentient beings. The enemy lost a third of its combat-ready army! Fragments of the fighters' memories will be attached to the report as required."
"What are the losses of our corps?" the announcer said clearly.
"Two hundred and seventy-three thousand one hundred and forty-three sentient fighters of the Defense Aspect. Of these, only seventy thousand are irretrievable. Twenty thousand are undergoing rehabilitation after death and are preparing to receive robotic bodies. The rest have injuries of varying severity. According to the staff, losses have approached the upper limit predicted for this period. The general-fabricator of the labor artels of the Skaven refused to comment on the number of losses of his kin, stating that for his people, any losses are acceptable in the fight against the enemies of the Motherland! According to approximate data, the assault rats lost two hundred thousand fighters."
"We are receiving reports that the enemy committed genocide by ordering the liquidation of slaves. Is this true?" the announcer's voice did not waver, but the bristling fur of the felinid was more than eloquent.
"Unfortunately," the correspondent's voice trembled. "About five million slaves were killed. The lists are being clarified, but the final numbers will be significantly higher. Local human rights organizations are helping to identify the victims. Local media refused to document such a blatant act of war crime. The list of material evidence, fragments of the memories of Red Army soldiers, and the seized memories of the perpetrators will also be attached to the report..."
A tired CERBER employee yawned, taking off his headphones as he finished the last lines of the analytical report. Not forgetting to attach his emotional package to the file, he sent the report to the higher department.
Stretching in his chair, regretting that due to official necessity he had missed the general morning exercise, not even making it to the fourth shift, he began to think.
Exploring someone else's network, the Extranet, he had seen a lot, and of that, the good part was minuscule. What can be said – how many genitals he saw in one month of preparatory work, he had not seen in his entire life! And what sentient beings can do in sexual perversions with themselves and others would long haunt the Soviet intelligence officer in his nightmares.
Among all this filth, the analyst saw beautiful things, lost in the avalanche of forbidden entertainment. Although... how forbidden are they, when even small children could access them?
The analyst shuddered at the memories of those horrific videos of interspecies mating. For a Soviet person, it was not just disgusting – it was unnatural. And yet, he had to watch every second. In this informational garbage, real finds were hidden: for sociologists, psychologists, and even military intelligence.
"So this is what the capitalist world is like... Sex, excess, and moral decay. If anyone doubted the correctness of our path, they are now convinced of the opposite. Let our society not be perfect... but sentient beings can let their children go play, and the worst thing that can happen is that a boy will scrape his knee. No, there are islands of calm there too. The same Hierarchy and the nomadic Quarians... And these sentient toad-rogues. Not only did they discover our connection, but the frogs tried to hack us! Let them try!" the CERBER employee mused.
Chuckling, the man decided to leave his work thoughts at work and began to get ready to go home. And at home, his wife would meet him and tell him what the working people were buzzing about. The absolute transparency of power and the absence of secrets for its citizens opened up access to the galaxy's information resources for the workers – albeit one-way for now.
While ordinary people were horrified, the people's analysts helped the cause of retribution, making their contribution...