Chapter 59: The Horse Talisman and Handsome Deadpool
The moment Ethan stepped onto the ground floor, Wade came bounding over like an overcaffeinated puppy.
"Ethan! You guys had all the fun last night and you didn't call me! Parallel universes! I want to meet the other me! Is he even handsomer than I am? Is that possible?" Wade was gesturing wildly with every word.
Ethan shook his head. "You were off chasing bounties. That's on you. If you want to know whether there's another you, go ask Miles."
Ethan knew perfectly well that Wade's multiverse counterparts were a whole spectrum of bizarre. There was even a universe where Deadpool was an unscarred pretty-boy — though Ethan couldn't remember which designation that one was.
The magic word "money" snapped Wade to attention. He slung an arm around Ethan's shoulders with predatory glee. "Bro. I made twenty million dollars last night. I can afford so much female companionship. So much."
"Ethan — when are we doing a parallel universe road trip, huh?"
"When we actually have a way to get there. Now stop bothering me. Here — eat this. It'll fix your face." Ethan tossed him a Senzu Bean.
Wade caught it and eyed it skeptically. "This tiny thing? Is it poison?"
Ethan rolled his eyes. "Poison wouldn't kill you anyway. Eat it. You'll see."
Wade clutched his chest dramatically. "Ethan — if it's from you, I'd eat poison. Every time." He swallowed the bean in one gulp.
The effect was immediate. The scarred ruin of Wade's face began to smooth. Craters filled in. Skin became clear, tight, almost unrecognizable. Within seconds, he was... beautiful.
Wade squealed. He started bouncing in place, grabbing every reflective surface he could find, striking poses. He ran out onto the street and started asking random residents, "Am I hot? Am I hot?!" until several of them mistook him for a creep and gave him a good beating.
He came back a few minutes later, still beaming.
"Bro — thank you. Seriously."
Ethan's expression soured. He'd just noticed something.
Wade's skin was already starting to deteriorate. The old scarring was creeping back.
The Senzu Bean had done its job — but it was a one-time fix. Wade's cancer and his healing factor were locked in permanent mutual destruction, and the bean couldn't cure that dynamic. It could only reset the visible damage for a moment.
Wade noticed it too. His face fell.
"Bro — I know I'm about to look like roadkill again. But hey. At least I got this."
His voice carried more pain than he wanted to let show. For a man whose entire persona was built on jokes and bravado, it was a rare crack in the facade.
He turned to walk away.
"Hold on." Ethan caught his arm. "I wasn't finished. I have something else. This one should actually solve it."
Wade forced a grin, still in deflection mode. "Your great Lord Deadpool is always the handsomest, no matter what. I've had years to get used to the face. You don't have to comfort me, buddy."
He assumed Ethan was just being nice. He kept the mask up.
Ethan pulled out the Horse Talisman and handed it over.
Wade turned it over in his fingers, curious. "Cool-looking charm. How do I use it?"
"Try sneezing," Ethan said. "This thing will clear the cancer out of your system. It cures any disease — as long as you keep it on you."
Wade stared at him. Then at the Talisman. The disbelief and hope in his eyes were almost painful.
A soft light pulsed from the charm. A few seconds later, Wade's face stabilized. Smooth. Unscarred. Permanent.
Wade didn't jump around this time. He just stood in front of the mirror, studying himself, his expression somewhere between awe and terror — afraid that if he moved, it would all slip away.
Ethan sat down nearby and waited. He understood what Wade was feeling. He didn't need to fill the silence.
Half an hour passed before Wade finally exhaled.
His face was still there. His face was still his. He was free.
"This must be incredibly rare," Wade said quietly, looking at the charm.
"It's fine. There's only one in the world — so take care of it." Ethan waved a hand. "Family's worth more."
"Thank you. Thank you, brother." Wade's voice shook. "My life is yours from this moment on."
It was a rare, unguarded moment — no jokes, no bits, no theater. Just gratitude.
「DING! Wade Winston Wilson's friendship level has reached MAX.」
「Wade Winston Wilson has become your Family!」
Ethan felt genuine happiness for him. Wade's old existence — trapped behind a ruined face for years — had been a slow kind of hell. If Ethan had been in his place, unable to even die...
Wade being Family also meant Ethan could bring him along on any multiverse excursions. Wade was, if nothing else, a fantastic extrovert.
Just then, Miles came down the stairs.
"Ethan, you wanna hit the bars tonight? My treat, to thank you." Wade was already back to full lecher mode, the sincere moment evaporating instantly.
Ethan's warm feelings died on the vine. He pointedly ignored Wade and turned to Miles.
"Grab some breakfast. I'm taking you to meet someone today. He might have a way to get you home."
"Who?" Miles asked.
"A playboy."
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