Chapter 187: Whose Sake (1)
Gaionia looked down at Deborah with an indifferent gaze.
“I-I don’t want to die. I was t-tricked by the Grand priest to come here. He said I’m a person who does not beli-believe in god so I would be able to do something, but…”
It wasn’t so difficult for Gaionia to see what Michael was thinking.
He must have brought that child as a weapon to aim at his heart if Hades were to fail.
But the child was so frail.
She must have instinctively sensed that the deaths of all those other than Michael and Aisha were close. She pleaded, not wanting to die.
“P-please… hmb, s-save me too. I won’t be a child that pains you, father. Please save me. I am also-also a child made by you, father. I will stay by father’s side all my life. I don’t want to die. I’m scared…”
Deborah muttered as she held onto Gaionia’s feet.
[You too…]
“Yes! I too, hmb, I too am your child, father. I promise that I will never put you in pain, father. I will not leave you to feel lonely. I do not want to die. I-I will be by your side, father.”
Gaionia’s exhausted eyes calmly stared at Deborah.
Other than Genus and Ignis, as well as Procreathor, who was no longer here, he had never loved other creations as much as he did them.
That was true even now.
In truth, Deborah, Hades and Abel were all humans just like his children, but their significance was different.
That was why he was being heartless at taking away their lives, but…
[I see. You want to live.]
Seeing the child begging for life with yearning to survive moved Gaionia’s exhausted heart.
His eyes once again glanced at Aisha and Michael. Michael was still burning with hatred and trembled feeling betrayal as he stared at Deborah.
“How could you beg for your life to the likes of him so pitifully, priestess? Is the rage and hatred I taught you only amount to that much?”
“No. no… I want to live. I won’t take the life given by father so lightly. Please spare me.”
[Ignis.]
Ignoring the child at his feet, Gaionia approached Michael.
[Let us go back. I will not punish you of your sins of hating me and despising me.]
“Get lost.”
Gaionia laughed limply at the answer given without even a moment’s hesitation.
This time, he reached out his hand at Aisha who was sitting beside him.
[Genus, my child.]
“…”
[If you understand my intention of cherishing you, please, let us go back together.]
Aisha stared at Gaionia for a while and answered with her actions instead.
With her eyes still hollow, she hugged Hades’ cold body closely.
With her cheek wet from tears against his, Aisha laughed in a small voice. It was heartbreaking to see her face looking like she had lost her mind.
‘I have failed once more.’ Aisha thought.
The future was not so different from when she saw in the dream.
No, it felt like some things had changed ever since she decided to plead with Giaonia, but the result was even more tragic instead.
Unlike the future she saw in the dream, Michael standing on the other side seemed to have lost all will, unlike how he was fired up to kill Gaionia…
And Deborah who could not do anything in tears and was on her knees at Gaionia’s feet begging to live.
Azar, who she thought would die, was standing on his two feet somehow, but he was deeply wounded just the same…
And Hades,
“I’m sorry.”
He died having lost his right arm that held onto his sword till the last moment and wiped away her tears.
Nothing could be more tragic than the state he was in in his last moments, losing his biggest weapon as a warrior.
There was no hope.
Of the two ‘beings that do not believe in god’ that could kill Gaionia, Hades was unfit for battle and Deborah was begging for her life.
Even if Deborah stayed as a being that does not believe in god, There was no way she could drive a sword through Gaionia’s heart with her tiny weak body.
Everything was truly over.
‘Come to think of it, this is how things always were.’
Aisha laughed cynically as she patted Hades’ cold cheek with dazed eyes.
She saw numerous futures where she kills her child, and struggled to avoid the same tragedy, only to fail every time.
No, on the contrary, her other choices have always brought bigger tragedies like this.
It was like that in that life where… she met Hades for the first time, too.
She had driven many innocent children to their deaths in order to not kill her child, and that was definitely her fault.
If I rather did not do anything…
If I didn’t tell Hades everything when I recalled my past life,
If I didn’t ask him to kill me.
Now, he had become a presence she couldn’t live without as much as Abel was, but in the end…
‘Now I’m really sick and tired.’
She could understand Michael’s sentiment in telling him to rather kill them.
In a world where Abel had gifted her his death in every single life, and Hades had sacrificed himself for her sake, what meaning would she find in living so shamelessly?
Aisha steadily raised her head and locked eyes with Gaionia and spoke.
“I do not wish to live.”
[…]
“I have loved you, father. But not anymore. I despise you as much as I do myself.”
It was her true sentiment, one that she thought would never be able to say before him out of fear.
Though Gaionia’s face was indifferent, Aisha could read his insides being overturned in shock.
Despite the tragedy, there was a cynical excitement in that.
Aisha spoke with a smile.
“I have never once felt sorry to discard this sinful life you gave me. And now that you have killed the only person that made me want to live despite that, I have no attachment left.” Holding Hades body becoming cold and stiff, Aisha added coldly. “Even if a new life free from you is granted to me, I will not forget about you. I will curse you forever.”
[Is that… your answer to my love?]
“Please!” Aisha shouted with bloodshot eyes, “Don’t say you love me.”
[…]
“It’s not a word you can say.”
The man who she wished to have told her that, the man who truly loved her enough to say such a thing to her had died.
Unable to say the word until the very end.
“Your expression… what a sight to see.” Watching them, Michael smiled mockingly and ridiculed Gaionia. “How does it feel? To be ignored by your children you claim you loved them so much.”
[…]
“We could not overturn our fate but you’re no different.”
Michael had nothing to lose, he wasn’t afraid of death. He continued to talk to Gaionia who seemed to be in shock, “Just exist alone, forever shuddering from loneliness. There is no human who will love a crazy being as you. Just live your eternity, with no one beside you. Forever.”
That was the most horrid curse to Gaionia who had created this world and humans out of loneliness.
Gaionia’s empty eyes stared at Michael.
“Father…”
In that moment, he once again felt warmness holding onto his leg once more.
Gaionia’s dry gaze lowered.
“Were you lonely? Did you… did you do all that because you were lonely?” Deborah asked with a teary face. “Me-me too. When mother discarded me and I became alone… it was more painful to know that I was alone than dying.”
[…]
“In truth, I resented you, father. For making me lonely. I know that was foolish but…”
[How could that be your fault.]
Gaionia said as he stared down at Deborah crying.
The reason why this small child resented him should be because of Ignis.
Ignis would have urged Deborah to resent god, seeing how much he despises him.
“I don’t like being lonely, but I am also scared of dying. Huu… Father please, please let me live. I will be by your side, keeping you from feeling alone.”
“Hahahaha!” Hearing Deborah’s plea Michael bursted into laughter.
He spoke with rage in his eyes, “Are you truly the priest who teared up about how unfortunate me and my sibling are? How can you bow your head to the one who has created all this tragedy? How much… how much have I…”
Trying to block out Michael’s shouting voice as he trembled in rage, Deborah covered her ears.
Gaionia crouched down slowly to pick up Deborah from the ground.
She stared at Gaionia with a look of surprise.
[I see…]
There was lust for life inside the child’s eyes. A truthful sentiment that could not be made up.
She was quite different from his children who did not value the life he had given them.
“Father…”
[…]
“I will understand you and love you, father. I will be by your side so that you don’t feel alone.”
Looking at Deborah clinging on to his neck, Gaionia recalled Genus from her younger years.
[Look, father. The world you’ve created is so beautiful.]
The child who handed him a flower she picked with a shy smile.
[I love you, father.]
A child who smiled as she hung onto his neck and said she loved him.
A lovely child, a child one cannot help but love.
And now that child was pouring curses on him with bloodshot eyes, saying that she despises him.
It was sad.
If he could feel human emotions, this would be the closest thing to sadness, Gaionia thought.
[I am in pain. All the children I have created have gone against my will…]
Finally, a tear rolled from his eyes.
Deborah looked at him with a look that seemed like she was more heart broken than he was and wiped away the tear off Gaionia’s cheek before she dug into his arms.
“I will, I will follow your will, father. Please don’t discard me.”
[Very well, poor child of mine. I am glad at least you understand my intention.]
Though his heart was this devastated, it was laughable yet surprising to know a single human child who resembled Genus could cheer him up this much.
His caprice decided on sparing this little child.
[Do not be sad. You will finally be free within my world when you obey my will…]
Finishing those words, Gaionia stared at Michael
[Unlike that foolish child of mine…]
Although he was betrayed by his children, he had no intention of giving them up as they willed.
After erasing all the memories of this painful world, they would return to the loving children of his as they were.
[Let us return.]
Gaionia slowly approached Aisha and Michael.
They still had resentment in their eyes.
[Everything will return to the beginning…]
This time, he would not make a mistake.
No matter how much children appealed about their loneliness, he would never…
[The only precious things to you…]
He said as he looked into Aisha’s crying eyes.
[Are me, your father, and your siblings. That would be all.]
Gaionia raised his hand slowly.
It was the last moment.
[My dear…]
And at that moment,
Aisha’s eyes on him were drenched in surprise.
Gaionia could not realize right away what had happened.
[Ah.]
A sensation of his heart stiffening at once like a stone as a cold blade dug into it.
The infinite source of mana he had to create this world with, suddenly froze coldly like an unfeeling stone all of a sudden.
He slowly turned his head to see Michael snickering.
Only then, Gaionia’s head stiffly tilted below.
A small blade, precisely through the heart.
Holding the half of the blade he had broken himself, Deborah spoke.
“Die, demon.”