I spent three days preparing for the Min dinner, and I want to be precise about what that preparation actually involved. Because it was not what most people would assume.
It was not primarily about clothing, though clothing was part of it.
I chose carefully: deep indigo, well-made but not ostentatious, the kind of garment that communicated financial stability and competence without performing either. Nothing that could be read as trying too hard. The jewelry was minimal and real — two pieces that had been in the house before I arrived, carrying the unassuming age that communicates old rather than new.
Kaien asked me once whether the dark grey coat or the charcoal one was more appropriate, accepted my answer without further discussion, and considered the matter entirely resolved. There was something quietly satisfying about a person whose relationship to appearances was that functional.
The bulk of the preparation was information.
