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Pov of a Estonian
April-4-May-1920
Finally, after spending quite some time on the mainland, they had allowed me to return home.
I had made the stupid decision to join the British in their attempt to drive the Herzog out of Riga, but everything had ended in complete failure. The expedition that landed in and around Riga had been captured or massacred almost entirely.
The British had promised us an easy campaign. According to them, we would only have to expel the Germans from our lands and afterward we would be rewarded with large properties confiscated from the Herzog, since he controlled a considerable part of the lands of all the Baltic countries.
However, aside from handing us a rifle and giving us minimal training, they threw us directly into the jaws of the German lions.
Those bastards were some of the most experienced soldiers of the entire war. Most of the Englishmen were terrified every time the Germans attacked. During the bombardments, I constantly saw them praying, hoping it would all end as soon as possible.
In the end, I had practically been forced to participate. The British had confiscated almost all the food from the villages, while the greenhouses built to allow us to survive the winter had been completely looted. They also emptied the granaries.
The English controlled all the food and, although very few of us wanted to join them, they ended up forcing us through hunger.
In a way, many of us preferred to remain under the Herzog's government rather than risk ending up with some new ruler.
Unlike the old officials who administered these lands in the name of the Tsar, the German Herzog had at least made sure we were protected against famines.
However, because of the situation, many of us ended up taking up arms against him, only to discover that we had practically thrown our lives away by choosing the losing side.
We expected a normal reaction, similar to what any Russian governor would have done: mass executions, men hanging from trees, firing squads and things like that.
But the punishment imposed by the Herzog himself had been… nothing… absolutely nothing.
They released us from confinement, but since we had no way to return home because the islands remained blockaded, we had to stay in a supposed prison camp in Estonia.
Although calling it a prison camp was quite an exaggeration.
In truth, it was a village practically the same as ours. There were very few differences from our homes after the Herzog resettled us in those new houses, built by workers who were now our neighbors.
It was obvious that the place had never been designed to hold prisoners. They simply used it because they had nowhere else to house us.
That was how we ended up living for months in that German colony, while the English evacuated the region and abandoned us to whatever reprisals the Germans wanted to take.
However, by divine grace, that reprisal never came.
We suffered no consequence for having joined the British.
As much as we wanted to return to our homes, doing so was complicated. There were no ships available. The English had sunk almost all the German vessels, so there was no way to return to the islands except by using small wooden boats incapable of transporting so many people.
Our stay in the colony had to be prolonged until vessels from other regions began arriving at the ruins of the ports.
Finally, after a long wait and after the British withdrawal, we had managed to return home.
We were back on Ösel.
And the moment we disembarked, it became clear that the German presence was returning.
When I disembarked at the port of Arensburg, I saw that there were already many ships and German soldiers unloading supplies. They moved crate after crate of equipment, while vehicles rolled down from other vessels.
Many people had been expelled from their homes to house the British during the winter, since those soldiers had not wanted to endure the cold inside their camps.
Now the Germans seemed to be trying to return the inhabitants to their homes. As part of the Herzog's great attempt to make governing the region easier, almost the entire population of Ösel's villages had been concentrated in that coastal city. Many of the other villages had been left practically abandoned.
When I arrived in front of my house, I began to feel very nervous.
I did not know what my parents had done during my absence, or whether they believed I was dead. The last time they had seen me, I had given them enough food for a couple of weeks before being forced to accompany the British during the landing at Riga.
I remained in front of the door for quite some time, thinking about what I should say. Finally, I acted more by instinct than by decision and knocked on the wood.
I waited outside, but no one answered.
I knocked again and, after a few moments, my mother opened the door.
''Jaan!'' she exclaimed, spreading her arms.
She was much thinner than I remembered. Her skin seemed to cling to her bones.
''Mother, I'm back'' I said as I embraced her and placed a hand on her hair.
''Come in, come inside'' my mother replied, nervously looking both ways down the street before letting me in and closing the door.
''Edvin! Edvin, come here! Jaan has returned!'' she shouted while walking deeper into the house.
It did not take long for my father to appear, completely shaken.
''Jaan… When the British left, I feared the worst'' he said before embracing me tightly.
Like my mother, he was much more gaunt than the last time I had seen him.
''We have to do something. The Germans started returning today and they will surely be looking for Jaan'' my mother said, increasingly nervous while trying to think of what to do.
''Yes, that's true. We can take him to our old village and hide him there before the German authorities discover that he has returned'' my father proposed, visibly disturbed.
''Calm down, calm down. The Herzog spared my life. They captured me near Riga and, instead of getting angry or punishing us, he simply laughed at us. He kept us fed while he waited to find a way to send us back home. I came here on one of the German ships'' I explained while beginning to remove the British uniform I was still wearing.
''The Herzog himself forgave you? But he… He is known for having no mercy'' my father said, surprised.
''Yes, I also thought he was going to kill me. When they brought me before him, he immediately recognized that we were Estonians and understood that something strange had happened. At first, I saw those butcher's eyes everyone talks about, but then his expression changed and he seemed genuinely concerned. I froze when I saw him. They treated us well while we waited for them to transport us back home. I do not have to hide. I just need to get rid of this uniform and burn it'' I explained while finishing taking off my trousers.
''You do not know how happy we are to see you again, Jaan. We thought you had died, especially after the British abandoned the island without telling us anything'' my father said while embracing me tightly again.
I could feel his breathing against my hair.
''Where are my brothers?'' I asked, calmer now while my parents surrounded me and embraced me.
''Fishing. The British took almost all the boats, but some were hidden in the abandoned villages. Now we use them to fish and get some food'' my father explained after letting me go and looking me in the eyes.
''From what I heard, the Herzog is banning fishing in the sea because the water was contaminated with fuel from the ships sunk in the Gulf of Riga. I do not think it is safe to keep eating those fish'' I replied, becoming more and more worried by the state of my parents, who looked famished.
''For now, we do not have much else to eat. The British took or ate the chickens and the cows. There is practically nothing left on the island that can feed us'' my mother said while gripping her apron with both hands.
''Look, I still have some rations from my stay on the mainland'' I said while opening a small sack.
Inside, there was some dried meat, bread and a tin of preserved food they had given me before sending me back.
''Oh… Wonderful. What is it?'' my mother asked as she took the tin.
''Canned meat. It comes from Ukraine. I did not understand what the label said either'' I replied while scratching my hair and watching my mother smile over a simple tin of food.
It did not take her long to try to open it, but then we heard several knocks at the door.
I followed my father and found a group of men outside.
''By order of the Herzog, anyone who needs help getting back on their feet must present themselves in the town's central square. There, they will receive a weekly food ration to survive while the island's agricultural production recovers'' the German officer announced.
Then he turned and began repeating the same message at the next house.
''The government of the good Herzog has returned'' my father said, clasping his hands together.
Without saying anything, I followed him toward the central square.
During the walk, I began noticing the consequences of the occupation. Many people had lost a considerable amount of weight because of the British and their shitty occupation.
The crowd was beginning to gather in the center of town, where a large number of German soldiers moved among several vehicles loaded with food.
They unloaded sack after sack of food, as well as whole crates of canned goods.
The Germans began working with great speed, handing out rations according to their old records on the number of members in each family. They did not even bother asking whether someone had died during the occupation. They distributed the food as if everyone were still alive, avoiding the creation of additional problems because of the British administration that had controlled the island.
''Citizens, I ask for your attention. I am Felix Wrangel, commissioner for the defense of the islands. By order of the Herzog, I have received emergency powers to make sure everything returns to something resembling normality. The greenhouses will be operating again very soon and, as we speak, new heads of livestock are being transported so that everyone can recover their work. For the next six months, any food you need will be provided by the State without questions'' the German officer announced, raising his voice so everyone could hear him.
''Repeating the words of Herzog Karl von Posen, we will never again abandon these islands. For that reason, a broad fortification process will soon begin under my command. We will never again allow anyone to set foot on these lands without first paying the price in blood and iron'' the German officer concluded while the distribution of food continued.
We advanced slowly in the line and, after waiting for a while, we received several sacks of food and numerous cans of preserves, enough to feed the whole family for more than a week.
Once we loaded everything, we returned home.
My family and I resumed normal life with relative calm. I returned to work in the greenhouses together with my brothers and my father, as if all the time we had spent separated had never existed.
Little by little, I began hearing everyone thank the Herzog for having returned, but I could feel nothing except shame for having been one of those who took up arms against him.
One day, after finishing work, I was walking with my brothers when we passed near one of the commissioner's patrols. Wrangel was pointing at some buildings while speaking with several officers, but when I passed beside him, he turned sharply and went on alert, staring at me.
''Well, well… If it isn't Mr. Tungsten Balls'' the commissioner said with a smile.
My brothers stared at me, confused, while Wrangel's guards began drawing their pistols.
''Nothing. Nothing is happening'' the commissioner told them.
The guards calmed down and put their weapons away again.
''What a coincidence. I was precisely looking for people with character for a job'' Wrangel continued.
''Eh… Well, I already have a job with my brothers'' I replied with a nervous smile, feeling more and more ashamed.
''As a farmer? With no disrespect to that profession, but if you are capable of looking Karl directly in the eyes without blinking while he has a pistol pointed at your face, then you have more soldier's material in you than most men I know'' the commissioner said.
Wrangel looked me up and down before nodding to himself.
''Very well. You are dismissed from your old job and hired again as a policeman. I need people capable of doing what must be done. Come with me'' he said while grabbing me by the shoulder and beginning to drag me along with him.
''Eh, but…'' I tried to protest.
It did not take long before I found myself being pushed into the local police station.
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