Deep beneath the Aegis Citadel, in the absolute lowest sub-basement of the royal vaults, the sound of frantic digging echoed through the damp stone.
King Aldric and King Vane were covered in dirt. They had discarded their heavy, jeweled crowns and velvet robes hours ago. Currently, the two most powerful monarchs of the Human Realm were holding iron shovels, aggressively tossing dirt over their shoulders.
"Deeper!" King Aldric wheezed, his eyes wide and bloodshot. "The ancient texts say a Seraphim's smite can pierce fifty feet of solid bedrock! We need to go down at least two hundred feet! Dig, Vane, dig!"
King Vane leaned on his shovel, panting heavily. "I am digging! My royal blisters have blisters! But Aldric, listen to yourself! A bunker won't save us! We summoned a pair of calamities!"
The Royal Knight Commander—who was still heavily bandaged from the time Leo flicked his broadsword to pieces in Chapter 1—was currently swinging a pickaxe into the stone wall, crying softly. "I told you we shouldn't have summoned them, Your Majesties. I told you the floral shirt was an omen."
King Aldric threw his shovel down, pacing in the dirt.
"We summoned them to stop the Demon War!" Aldric practically shrieked, pulling at his hair. "We just wanted them to kill Malakor! Do you know what the scouting reports said this morning?! Malakor is wearing a bowtie! He is pouring them sparkling water! The Demon Lords are functioning as their personal luggage handlers!"
"And that's not even the worst part!" Vane wailed, wiping mud off his face. "The spies at The Golden Griffin reported a golden sky-rift! The Heavens opened up! An angelic Enforcer descended to pass divine judgment... and the woman used his holy halo as a steering wheel to smash his face into the floor!"
The two kings stared at each other in absolute, soul-crushing horror.
"They adopted a fallen god," Aldric whispered, trembling. "And then they declared war on the Higher Realms because an angel ruined the child's dessert. Vane... they aren't going to just destroy the continent. They are going to get the entire dimension uninstalled."
"Keep digging!" Vane screamed at the weeping Knight Commander. "Double time!"
Suddenly, the temperature in the dirt bunker plummeted. The shadows in the corner of the room began to stretch and twist, forming a swirling vortex of dark magic.
The two kings shrieked, dropping their shovels and hugging each other. The Knight Commander instantly fainted.
"The Gods!" Aldric sobbed, squeezing his eyes shut. "The Heavens have come to smite us for our association with the floral-shirted monsters! Forgive us, O Luminous Ones!"
"Excuse me," a deep, polite, and heavily demonic voice echoed in the cavern.
The kings slowly opened their eyes.
Stepping out of the shadow portal was not a glowing angel of vengeance. It was Demon Lord Kaelen. The terrifying Sovereign of Shadows was wearing his crisp, tailored black-and-white butler suit, a white napkin draped neatly over his forearm. He was holding a small, pink magical notepad and a feather pen.
Kaelen looked around the muddy bunker, his glowing red eyes blinking in confusion. He elegantly stepped over a pile of dirt so as not to scuff his polished butler shoes.
"Your Majesties," Kaelen bowed flawlessly. "I apologize for the intrusion. I knocked on the throne room doors, but no one answered."
King Aldric stared at the legendary Demon Lord, completely frozen. "K-Kaelen the Blood-Drinker? What... what are you doing in our bunker?"
"I am currently acting as the Head Concierge for the Tropical Sunrise Resort," Kaelen corrected smoothly, tapping his pen against the pink notepad. "And I am on a rather strict timetable. The Lady Maya has requested that the Young Miss Elara be outfitted with a completely new, indestructible, and highly fashionable wardrobe by noon."
King Vane's jaw hit the dirt floor. "A... wardrobe?"
"Indeed," Kaelen nodded, his demonic face completely serious. "Her current tunic is unacceptable for a resort vacation. Furthermore, General Pavan and General Karthik accidentally ripped a hole in a dress shop's awning earlier, and Lady Maya was greatly displeased. We are trying to avoid another... incident."
Kaelen shuddered visibly at the memory of Maya's cold stare. He looked back at the terrified human kings. "So, I require the names and addresses of your top three royal tailors. Preferably ones who work with mythril-silk and do not ask questions about divine auras."
Aldric and Vane just stared.
The Demon Lord was running errands for a seven-year-old's closet.
"I... I will write them down for you," King Aldric stammered, frantically scrambling to find a piece of parchment.
"Excellent," Kaelen smiled, a terrifying expression on a face meant for nightmares. "Oh, and Your Majesties? If the tailors you recommend displease the Lady Maya... I would suggest digging this hole a bit deeper."
Kaelen bowed once more, stepped backward into the shadows, and vanished, leaving the scent of brimstone and expensive cologne in his wake.
King Aldric stood frozen in the dirt for three seconds. Then, he slowly turned to the fainted Knight Commander and kicked him in the shin.
"WAKE UP!" Aldric screamed. "AND BRING ME A BIGGER SHOVEL!"