After scolding someone, Lu Xiangyang continued to play ranked matches with a sullen face, not even glancing at the chat.
The chat exploded with messages:
[Baby, don't be angry.]
[Don't be sad, sweetheart, here's a hug.]
[Feels like Sun is about to cry.]
[This guy just likes to troll, don't mind him.]
[Such a cute baby got made angry… I'll go report him too, haha.]
[I'll send one too.]
[What, do you actually think EAR has no fans?]
Shen Kuangye glanced at Lu Xiangyang's chat, then looked back at him.
At this moment, Lu Xiangyang's head was lowered, his bangs covering most of his face, hiding his expression.
He played ranked in silence.
When the match ended, both of them turned off their streams.
Lu Xiangyang had been angry for over an hour and only now realized that he might have been a bit too harsh.
He nervously glanced at Shen Kuangye, his mind quietly panicking.
Had he really been that angry just now?
Was he different from usual?
Would Shen Kuangye think he was too sharp and dislike him?
"Damn it, why hasn't that idiot been banned yet?"
Book, who was always the fastest surfer, instinctively opened the forum as soon as he finished his game. The first post was about Sun being scolded.
"What happened?"
Pei Xunan had just finished a duo match with Cheng Rang and asked with concern.
"It's that guy… 'What's wrong with me picking the big room.' I've been screwed by him countless times. That jerk mixes ranks with secondary and scout characters, and when he loses, he comes to my stream to scold me. I blocked him, but he made a new account to scold me again. Anyone unaware would think he has some KPI in my stream." Li Shu said, clearly annoyed.
Pei Xunan frowned. "It's him again?"
This guy had scolded almost every professional team player at least once.
Book frowned, noticing Lu Xiangyang's expression was off. He patted his shoulder in comfort: "It's fine. Don't think too much. Don't take this kind of person's words to heart."
Lu Xiangyang nodded, still feeling low: "I know."
Shen Kuangye glanced at him but said nothing.
From noon until the end of evening practice, he noticed that Lu Xiangyang had been unusually quiet.
Others might not have noticed, but Shen Kuangye could clearly sense something was off.
After evening practice ended, everyone went to sleep.
The room was dim and heavy, with only a faint sliver of moonlight seeping through the curtains, barely illuminating Lu Xiangyang's lonely figure.
He curled up, legs pulled tightly to his chest, arms wrapped around his knees, as if trying to shrink into a tiny ball, hiding in this cold corner of the world.
His insomnia was actually quite severe, but for some reason, when he slept with Shen Kuangye, it always got better.
Tonight, however, he was a bit upset and couldn't sleep.
To prevent Shen Kuangye from noticing, he pretended to be normal, planning to silently process it alone.
But the more he thought that way, the harder it was to sleep.
That person's words kept looping in his mind, disturbing his peace.
They exposed all of Lu Xiangyang's vulnerabilities.
Although he loved games, he had understood from childhood that his family wasn't well-off. He never spent much money on games, only paying for a monthly card or buying 20 dice.
Today, that person had attacked him using that fact, which hurt a little.
Poverty had always been an unshakable part of his heart. Lu Xiangyang remembered his hardest school years: wearing the same pair of shoes for a month until the leather peeled off in chunks. To hide it, he tore off the rest of the leather, so others would think the shoes were meant to look that way.
He was afraid of being judged.
He wasn't a vain person; everyone knew, and he didn't care. But somehow, Shen Kuangye had seen it.
He didn't want Shen Kuangye to see these flawed parts of him.
He… he felt so insecure.
And Shen Kuangye had already supported him financially so much, making their relationship inherently unequal.
Lu Xiangyang always thought that once he repaid the debt, he might feel a little more confident.
But now he realized it wasn't like that—he had always been insecure.
He didn't even know what he was thinking, just wildly blaming himself. Eventually, he thought, "If I hadn't triggered that guy, he wouldn't have said such hurtful things."
Click.
The door opened.
Shen Kuangye had returned.
Lu Xiangyang quickly tried to steady himself and pretended to be asleep.
He heard Shen Kuangye put something back on the desk and then get into bed.
Shen Kuangye moved closer, quietly calling to him a few times. Lu Xiangyang didn't know how to respond and pretended not to hear.
"Asleep?"
He heard Shen Kuangye whisper.
Guilt washed over Lu Xiangyang.
He suddenly felt petty—why had he been upset over such trivial things?
Before he could think further, he felt someone gently lift him and place him in the middle of the bed.
Lu Xiangyang stiffened, and memories of mornings flashed through his mind.
He had always thought he rolled to the center of the bed due to his sleeping posture. Now he realized it was Shen Kuangye placing him there.
After settling him, Shen Kuangye noticed Lu Xiangyang's eyelashes trembling as if dancing.
Little liar.
He thought to himself.
He knew Lu Xiangyang didn't want to burden him with bad emotions and wanted to suffer alone.
So Shen Kuangye absolutely wouldn't allow that.
"Feeling sad?"
Shen Kuangye asked.
Lu Xiangyang realized his disguise had been seen through. He cautiously opened his eyes to glance at Shen Kuangye.
Shen Kuangye saw the usually smiling boy looking like a wounded fawn, his clear eyes full of grievance, the rims already reddened.
Shen Kuangye's heart twisted, and he instinctively reached out to stroke Lu Xiangyang's hair: "Had a rough day?"
He had seemed fine when alone.
But Shen Kuangye's words made Lu Xiangyang lose it, and tears immediately fell.
He quickly wiped them, softly defending himself: "No…"
Even as he spoke, the grievance in his voice was obvious.
Shen Kuangye simply nodded and didn't call him out. Instead, he asked: "Want a small cake?"
Lu Xiangyang, still teary-eyed, looked at him and nodded.
Shen Kuangye used his fingers to wipe his tears, then lifted him up.
He watched as Shen Kuangye turned, opened the cake box on the desk, unfolded a fork, and handed it to him.
"Try it. Not sure if you'll like it," Shen Kuangye said.
His tone was always gentle.
Lu Xiangyang took it gloomily, noticing the cake adorned with strawberries, and suddenly felt a lump in his throat, almost crying again.
Shen Kuangye grew slightly anxious: "Don't like it? We can get one you prefer instead."
Tears streamed down Lu Xiangyang's face, choking out: "Brother Kuangye… can you stop being so nice to me?"
He had rarely dared to make friends, and Lu Ning was often busy and inattentive.
No one had ever cared about his little moods, paid attention to him, or bought him small cakes to make him happy.
There were deeper reasons he couldn't speak out.
His insecurity was now fully exposed in front of Shen Kuangye. He could only plead for Shen Kuangye to stop being so good to him, to let him decay alone.
He had longed and envied those who could be comforted when upset. But now that it was his turn, he only wanted to escape.
He felt unworthy of this.
"Why say that?" Shen Kuangye looked at him. "I'm good to you because you're worth it.
Lu Xiangyang, you are worth it.
Want to tell me why you're upset today?"
Shen Kuangye wiped his tears, voice gentle beyond measure.
Lu Xiangyang pressed his lips, shaking his head: "Nothing… just some small stuff."
Even saying it embarrassed him. He had been so upset, but after Shen Kuangye's comfort, it seemed trivial.
It really felt like just small stuff now.
Shen Kuangye, however, didn't agree.
"If it makes you upset, it's not small. Your feelings are the most important."
He cooed softly: "Tell me, okay?"
Lu Xiangyang couldn't hold back and spoke about what upset him.
He also instinctively revealed the insecurities of his childhood.
Shen Kuangye didn't comment, simply listened quietly.
Seeing Lu Xiangyang's red, swollen eyes, his heart grew heavier and more pained.
An 18-year-old is always sensitive to others' words. Shen Kuangye had felt the same once, though experience later had made him numb.
When Lu Xiangyang finished, Shen Kuangye gently ruffled his hair: "That's impressive."
Lu Xiangyang stared at him, having wondered how Shen Kuangye would react.
He expected silence or a simple comfort, but not praise.
He froze for a few seconds. "Why say that?"
He felt he wasn't impressive at all, upset over trivial things for so long.
"Being able to finish school and become a professional player is impressive," Shen Kuangye said with a faint smile.
Lu Xiangyang felt embarrassed by the praise. He pressed his lips: "Brother Kuangye, I'll repay that money soon."
Shen Kuangye faintly nodded: "Eat the cake first."
He quietly relaxed.
He wasn't good at comforting people, so he had looked online for methods.
No one explained how to cheer up a little brother; most were about comforting a boyfriend. Shen Kuangye tried some suggestions that seemed feasible.
At first, seeing Lu Xiangyang cry had left him a bit flustered, unsure if his approach was right.
Now it seemed correct. Making him happy was the right approach.
Lu Xiangyang took a few bites, suddenly realizing Shen Kuangye hadn't eaten.
He instinctively dug a strawberry for him. "Brother Kuangye, want some?"
Shen Kuangye looked at him. "You don't mind?"
Only then did Lu Xiangyang realize what he was doing.
His face flushed. Stammering: "It's… it's fine."
Before he could hand the fork over, Shen Kuangye bent down and took the strawberry from it.
They were so close that Lu Xiangyang could see Shen Kuangye's long eyelashes and flawless profile.
The strawberry was sweet.
Shen Kuangye tried it, satisfied.
Next time, he'd order from this place again.
Lu Xiangyang's entire face was burning red.
After finishing the cake, Lu Xiangyang brushed his teeth and obediently lay down on the bed.
He hesitated for a moment but chose to sleep at the edge.
Shen Kuangye, watching professional league replays, didn't notice him.
After nearly twenty minutes, Shen Kuangye put down his phone and turned off the light.
He gently lifted Lu Xiangyang onto the bed, as usual stroking his hand, sighing softly: "Still so cold."
He didn't notice Lu Xiangyang's lashes trembling in the dark, instead holding his hand inside the blanket and burying his head in Lu Xiangyang's neck, closing his eyes.
Lu Xiangyang felt like he was burning up.