Michael, grab the smelling salts because this isn't just a plot twist—it's a "Psychological Nuclear Meltdown!" The "Moral Radiation" levels are off the charts. Our 158cm honey-badger Lola just went full primal on that "Giant Long-Limbed Idiot."
Guys, you should have seen the raid! Lola stormed that office and slammed that massive, "brawn-over-brains" idiot against the wall so hard the foundations shook! She had organized that room a thousand times, bought him mugs, tried to plant flowers in his soul—but that monster was still drowning in the same filth.
Lola grabbed a stick from a pile of cardboard boxes—which is now a "Scepter of Justice," Michael!—and started beating him in the stomach, roaring.
"You touch my hands, you try to claim me, yet you're out there with other women! Did they put me here as a babysitter, or are your pathetic feelings actually honest?"
And then... Michael, she locked him in the office bathroom!
