Even then, I knew how to stab myself so that there would be a lot of blood. Even though it looked horrible, I was in no danger.
"I wanted Yuno to experience the fear of losing someone truly dear, because I was afraid I might not make it in time next time. After that, we were able to talk normally and agreed that as long as she studied well, I would sleep with her only on the condition that she wouldn't get handsy."
"After that, I started taking her to hospices. I hoped that seeing parents helplessly watch their children slowly fade away would help her understand that her ideas about parents were wrong. And it worked. Having realized she had fallen in love with Deya with all her heart, I hoped she would take care of her if this whole Devils venture didn't work out. Besides, I unexpectedly realized that when she slept nearby, the nightmares about the day I lost Lily often receded."
"Despite all this, I really wanted her to live a normal life. She was very good at studying, managed to skip several grades, didn't cause problems, but she never managed to make friends. And now she sleeps with a man who spent no small effort to show her healthy family relationships. Besides that, she shares this man with others. I'm really a lousy father. Sometimes I think I'm not much better than her biological parents," Ray said with a wry smile.
"Don't talk nonsense," Miku replied. "You gave her love she never experienced. It was her own choice, and she's happy. Yes, our family is very unusual, but you deceived no one — each of us accepted it. You may think you don't deserve happiness, but that's not true. I'm sure if Lily can see us, she would want you to be happy. What she went through will leave a mark on her life forever, but I'm still glad you were able to give her at least a semblance of a normal life."
These words might have been delusional, but Ray truly believed that by allowing what happened to Lily, he no longer deserved happiness.
Suddenly, the man felt tears begin to roll down his face. Noticing this, Miku placed his head on her chest and, beginning to gently stroke his gray hair, said softly:
"Just as you make efforts to make us girls happy, we also want you to be happy. I know it's thanks to them that I was able to be here. You don't want us to see you weak, but you have the right to weakness. Each of us is ready to be there to ease your pain."
Ray constantly had images from that terrible video flashing through his mind. The thought that he had allowed this consumed him from within. After ending up in a wheelchair, the fear that something similar could happen again became his constant companion.
As if reading his thoughts, Miku said:
"I know what you're afraid of, but Yuno, Samantha, and even Kira can defend themselves if necessary. I'm also returning to training and plan to ask Yuno to start training our little one."
Ray wasn't bothered by what Miku said. He remembered the moment the girls brought Miku to their bedroom and realized he must accept her daughter as his own.
Miku's tender embrace and her words were able to push back the wave of self-hatred that had nearly overwhelmed Ray. He knew all his girls were well-trained. Besides that, their house was under constant guard, and if the girls went anywhere, a group of bodyguards followed them. But even so, this fear tormented his soul.
That time, when Lily was taken from him, he could only helplessly watch as his beloved was carried away to hell, and her last hours were a true nightmare. Back then, he was fat, practically blind, a helpless vegetable.
If something similar happened again, confined to a wheelchair, he would remain only a helpless observer.
Continuing to stroke his head, Miku began to sing softly. This led to Ray finally being able to fall asleep. Looking at him, Miku smiled tenderly. That evening brought her an understanding of her role in this unusual family: while her sisters helped her beloved change the world, she would heal his emotional wounds.