"Jennifer, what did you do to my banyan tree?"
President Maya cradled the banyan sapling she'd won from the gacha and marched into the living room, pigtails bouncing, to confront Jennifer.
The little banyan was completely bald. Not a single leaf, not even a tender new shoot. This was March, edging into April, peak spring. Manhattan, concrete jungle and all, was already draped in green.
When Maya had set the sapling on Jennifer's windowsill, it had been perfectly healthy, showing zero signs of rejecting its new world. Since nature hadn't killed it, then somebody had.
Jennifer eyed the naked stick of a tree with the decency to look embarrassed. After a long, guilty pause, she mumbled, "Maya, this is your fault, you little brat!"
"Excuse me? It's only nine-thirty at night—you haven't started dreaming yet, have you?"
Apparently having found her justification, Jennifer's spine straightened right up. "You told me this tree was a mutant species! That its fruit could smooth wrinkles and rejuvenate skin! I waited and waited but it never bloomed—and it's already spring!"
President Maya sighed. The tree was obviously still a seedling—nowhere near flowering age. Her "anti-wrinkle miracle fruit" pitch had been a throwaway excuse, and Jennifer had actually bought it.
"Even if it didn't bloom, it wouldn't just drop all its leaves on its own. You said it yourself—it's spring. So where are its leaves and buds?"
Jennifer's face went red. She hemmed and hawed. "Well—I was trying to get that beauty effect, right? Since it wasn't fruiting, I just... plucked one little leaf and tasted it. Ha ha, bet you didn't expect this, Maya—the leaves were sweet! After I ate one, the wrinkles on my face actually seemed lighter! So..."
Maya was so angry her twin pigtails practically stood on end. "So you didn't just eat all the leaves—you even picked off every new bud it tried to grow?!"
Jennifer's face crumpled into a portrait of martyrdom. "My life is so hard. I'm barely past thirty and I've already had two kids. Meg Ryan is about the same age as me, and her posters for Sleepless in Seattle—opening this June—are plastered all over town. She's playing America's bright, optimistic sweetheart. Meanwhile, I'm covered in wrinkles, youth gone forever. All I did was eat a few leaves, and my own daughter is giving me attitude..." She sniffled theatrically.
Madam President listened to this performance, utterly exasperated. Her voice came out flat and tired. "Jennifer, I already told you—this banyan is a mutant variety. One of a kind in the entire world. And it's still a seedling. Even if it could fruit, that's years away."
"What?! Years?! How is that soon enough? And what exactly did you tell me before?!"
Just like that, the martyrdom act vanished, replaced by full-volume outrage.
For fuck's sake—Jennifer, you are this much of a drama queen and you're still doing bit parts on Broadway? Honestly, I think you've got serious Oscar potential.
"Fine, Jennifer, I'll come clean. There were originally two fruits. I ate one and planted its seed—that's the sapling you see now. The other one, you ate. And you swallowed the seed along with it. So now this seedling is all that's left in the entire world."
One lie gets exposed—what do you do? Simple: make up a new one on the spot.
"But... but I didn't notice any pit?" Jennifer asked, genuinely puzzled.
"There was one. You ate too fast and missed it." Maya's small face was the picture of conviction, eyes clear and unwavering.
It wasn't until Madam President retreated to her bedroom with the pitiful banyan that she realized Jennifer had played her. She'd gone in there to hold Jennifer accountable, and somehow ended up explaining herself, and comforting the woman. How had that happened?
It had been a long time since she'd checked her stats. Tonight she had the time, so Maya pulled up her system panel.
Influence Points: 210,721
Power System: Gimpy Chūnin
Ninja:
Chakra: 4.5 (+0.4)
Ninjutsu: 16.7 (+1.2)
Taijutsu: 0.1 (—)
Genjutsu: 0.0
Experience: 0.6 (+0.1)
(Baseline: Konoha 12 genin graduation average = 1.0; chūnin = 4.0; jōnin = 16.0; each subsequent tier scales by a power of 4. Values in parentheses = gains since last check.)
Bloodline: None
Skills:
1. Uchiha Shurikenjutsu (Incomplete): Bronze Lv. 10 (98%)
2. Chakra Sea: Silver Lv. 10 (23%)
3. Rasengan: Gold Lv. 3 (50%)
4. Nara Clan Secret Jutsu: Gold Lv. 2 (87%)
5. Hansen Three-Body Technique (Incomplete): Diamond Lv. 1 (12%)
Talents:
1. Marvel Sage
Knowledge: Silver Lv. 7 (77%)
Cognition: Gold Lv. 8 (34%)
Performance: Bronze Lv. 9 (12%)
2. Super Senses (Mutated, Upgradeable): Gold Lv. 4 (76%)
Skill Cards:
Bronze Lv. 5 — Fire Style: Fireball Jutsu
Silver Lv. 3 — Water Style: Hidden Mist Jutsu
(Percentages indicate growth progress.)
The picture was clear. Because she'd been spamming Shadow Clones so heavily, the time she spent cultivating the Hansen Sage-Ninja Method had shrunk considerably, and her Chakra growth had slowed to match.
On the flip side, all that clone-fueled nighttime prowling meant her Ninjutsu stat was still climbing fast.
The two skill cards were pretty good, but her Black Shop had never once stocked an experience pack. Having the hand-seal sequences alone wasn't much use to Maya.
Every night now, her Shadow Clone roamed the city until one or two in the morning. It wasn't that President Maya had turned into some bleeding-heart saint who couldn't bear to see New Yorkers suffer.
It was just that every person she saved—however minor the impact on their life—reliably generated Influence Points.
Sure, Maya could monitor the NYPD's public radio frequency, but plenty of crimes were only reported to the police after they happened. Was Madam President supposed to show up and take witness statements too?
Take tonight, for example. Thanks to Matt's help, a whole string of sexual assaults and robberies had been stopped right as they were happening or just before they could begin.
Stopping a crime before it happened earned zero Influence Points. Only intervening while it was in progress paid out. Rescuing someone generated Influence Points from both the victim and the perpetrator. But once a crime was complete, the victim might already be dead—and who exactly were you collecting points from then?
This was what made Matt so absurdly valuable. Detecting crime earlier wasn't just critical for the victims; it was critical for Maya's income stream.
Just now, another system chime had sounded—meaning at least another 1,000 Influence Points deposited.
Lying in bed while money falls from the sky. That was Maya's situation in a nutshell. The mental backlash from a Shadow Clone's memories merging back was rough, sure, but she was asleep when it happened—plenty of time for the pressure to dissipate.
That was also why President Maya rarely used Shadow Clones during the day. It wasn't only about the risk of being spotted.
"Since I'm raking in so many Influence Points tonight, maybe I could do one little refresh on the Black Shop? Just this once. One time! If I ever break my no-gacha, no-Shop-refresh vow again after this, I'm a pig!"
Having made this vicious oath, Madam President proceeded to toss her self-imposed spending ban out the window with zero remorse. Just like every gambling addict in history—every binge was always the last one. Until the next one. And the one after that. Forever.
"Start refresh!"
−100. Explosive tags ×10. 1,000 Influence Points.
Buy!
−100. Kunai ×1. 20 Influence Points.
Pass—still got a stash under my bed.
−100. Explosive tags ×5. 500 Influence Points.
"Buy!" Madam President gritted her teeth.
−100. Explosive tags ×20. 800 Influence Points.
"...Buy..."
−100. Kunai ×5. 5,000 Influence Points.
More kunai? Pass, obviously. Wait—why so expensive? Oh. These were forged from Chakra Metal. Gotta buy!
Just think about Asuma's Flying Swallow technique from Naruto—that wicked Chakra edge! And unlike generic unranked kunai, high-end Chakra Metal might actually resonate with Maya's Chakra. If it did resonate, at minimum it'd give her one more transformation type.
−100, continue. Senbon ×50. 200 Influence Points.
Useless. Pass.
−100. Scentless purple nail polish ×1. 400 Influence Points.
Already have a bottle under the bed. Pass.
−100. Uzumaki Clan Exclusive: Dead Demon Consuming Seal. 150,000 Influence Points.