Lucien stopped the concentrated flow of Nexus into his eyes, and his eyes turned back into the deep amber color it was before.
Lucien shut his eyes tightly, taking a deep breath before opening them again.
DRIP. DRIP. SPLAT.
Lucien heard the same sounds of dripping blood splatting on the floor.
He immediately realized that he was dragged back to reality from the depths of his existence.
He sat up and observed as the blood dripping down from the corpses created small ripples on the pool of blood on the ground.
Taking yet another deep breath, Lucien stood up and walked towards the stairs of the basement.
He stared at the top of the stairs, where the entrance to the basement was. It was still closed, just like he thought.
The only difference between then and now was that now, Lucien could use Nexus, however incomplete it may be.
Focusing on directing the faint flow of Nexus to his eyes yet again, Lucien shut his eyes, peering into his body, only to find that the faint connection between his heart and mind had grown immensely weaker in comparison to earlier.
I'm… already unable to use Nexus..? Is my understanding truly that lacking..?
Lucien was utterly distraught, and also immensely disappointed in his own inability to use Nexus.
Perhaps… I should take this remaining month before the ceremony to learn, to understand…
"I must start right away..!"
Lucien sat in a Lotus position, focusing on his own reality and existence.
A few moments later, his consciousness got transported to the world of his existence yet again.
Yet… Lucien was pleasantly surprised when he opened his eyes.
Though ravines and scars still marked the land, the vast, hot and molten lands, filled with volcanoes, had vanished. In their place were vast plains with fields of grass for as long as one could see, and a lake in the middle. The dark, rainy clouds which dominated the skies had been replaced with bright, white clouds.
"This world is your very existence itself."
Onyx's earlier words echoed in his mind, making him ponder.
"Existence, huh… What does the ground and sky represent, then..?"
Curiosity gnawed at Lucien's mind, yet when he searched for answers, he found none.
Perhaps it would be better to ask Onyx if I see him again.
Setting those thoughts aside, Lucien sat in a Lotus position.
***
Lucien faced the abyss once more, yet did not falter. He walked forward without hesitation, fighting through his fear.
With the amount of mastery I have over myself, I should be able to gain more from this place…
Lucien thought, unsure.
Despite his fear, he kept moving, each step pulling him deeper into the endless abyss.
Before long, Lucien lost his direction, having been completely swallowed by the abyss.
Where do I go from here..? Where even am I..?
Lucien's heart started beating quicker, and his pupils dilated, taking over his irises.
No… I must not falter. Who knows what will happen if I do?
Not letting his fear overtake him, he walked further and further into the abyss, directionless.
Before realizing, he had gotten swallowed whole.
What… Why am I translucent..? What's happened?
Lucien was astonished at his current state.
Lucien gazed in front of him, at an endless web, all interconnected.
He noticed that the threads of this web were all converging into one place.
Lucien could feel the thing's gravity pulling him in despite the distance.
It was a small, singular spherical point no bigger than his palm, yet when he gazed into it, blood unstoppably poured out of his eyes, nose and ears.
His mind was completely overwhelmed with information. Lucien had instinctively realized that this… was the Nexus which Onyx spoke of.
Lucien's translucent body started hovering towards one of the nodes connecting the web.
He no longer had any control over his body.
Emotional… node..?
Lucien's brain comprehended this sliver of information among the endless amounts the Nexus had given him.
Immediately after, he was pulled into the node by an unspeakable force.
Inside of the Emotional node lay other nodes, yet his eyes landed on one. That one was the node of fear.
Lucien walked near it, and he finally realized what he had been missing.
So that was it..! I had simply been so focused on comprehending 'emotions', that I never even tried comprehending anything deeply..! It was merely surface-level comprehension!
Lucien decided at that moment.
I will comprehend the emotional node of 'fear'!
Steeling himself, he immediately decided to try and comprehend 'fear', yet he was unable to do so due to his brain being overwhelmed.
…It seems I must get out of here before actually being able to comprehend…
Lucien realized, and just as he willed it, the abyss shattered, transporting Lucien back to where he was.
***
He slowly opened his eyes, standing back up from the Lotus position.
Immediately after, his mind calmed, and the overwhelming amounts of information had vanished, leaving behind only the parts which he had managed to comprehend.
"It seems that you've gained a lot?"
Onyx observed. Speaking suddenly, he startled Lucien and made his body jolt.
"!— Oh! Onyx! You startled me!"
Lucien stuttered.
"Well, whatever you do, be thorough, kid."
Onyx advised, before ultimately leaving.
As Onyx turned to leave, Lucien called after him.
"Onyx! Wait! Can you properly explain to me what Nexus is..?"
Onyx turned around, his eyes devoid of amusement, simply cold and observing.
"Nexus, huh… Well. Nexus isn't a form of energy. It is existence itself. To use Nexus is to master yourself and understand the world to such a degree that you can use that knowledge in order to mold the laws of the world to your own liking."
Onyx explained calmly.
"However, like anything good, using Nexus also has drawbacks. You shall find out about them through experience, for if I am to say anything further, it will hinder your development. Nexus relies on independent understanding, after all."
Onyx continued, before finally leaving Lucien alone.
***
In the real world, Lucien's eyes opened. Yet Onyx's words kept echoing in his mind.
Drawbacks, huh…
Thinking nothing of it, Lucien finally started pondering, trying to understand the essence of fear.
Fear… what causes it, really? What even is it..? One never has a constant fear, it's more…
Lucien's thoughts drifted off as he recalled every time he felt fear in his life.
That's it, isn't it..? The unknown. Everything stems from it. If one has intelligence but no understanding, they would have no anchor to rely on when things go wrong. That is how fear is born…
Lucien realized. A moment later, he felt immense power coming from himself, as the link between his mind and heart grew stronger…