Hades browsed through the schedule of his upcoming appointments, feeling both proud and apprehensive as he reviewed the list of names. Proud because his practice was thriving and gaining more clients as word spread across the various divine realms. But after dealing with the likes of Zeus and Ares, he couldn't help but feel apprehensive of encountering more personalities like theirs— drunk on their own power and importance.
Of course that was to be expected when beings such as themselves wielded the power to alter nature and reality itself. Unfortunately, power… unchecked power often became a disease of the mind. Couple that with immortality, concepts such as morality, justice, empathy, and so on, begin to take on new meaning for ones such as themselves. To stave off the noose of ennui, gods played by an extremely different set of rules.
There was a common trait Hades had noticed among the gods. Narcissism.
His next patient possessed that very trait, as expected of one of Zeus' favoured offspring. His arrival in the waiting room was heralded by a blinding flare of light and an enveloping warmth.
"Well, if it isn't the golden boy of Olympus himself. Welcome to the Underworld Wellness Centre, nephew," Hades greeted with a reserved smile.
Apollo was one of the gods he rarely interacted with, so there was a touch of awkwardness in the air unlike the familiarity he had with someone like Hermes. Despite his radiant appearance —long, lustrous curls adorned with a laurel wreath, bronzed skin, and amber eyes— there was something muted about Apollo's presence.
"Hades, thank you for seeing me. Your clinic is…" He glanced around the bare waiting room, nose scrunched as he took in the dying plants. They perked up slightly in his presence, leaning toward him as if lured by his light. "It's just as I imagined," he added with a smile that was too wide and too toothy to be genuine. "Do you run it by yourself?" He looked around, as if expecting someone else to appear.
"Usually, Charon is out here to greet patients, but there's been an unusually high influx of souls coming in."
"Ah, yes. So how does this work? I came here at Hermes' suggestion but he didn't offer much on what happens here. Do we just stand out here while you listen to me talk at you, or...?" He quirked a brow, adjusting his extravagant robes.
"Let's step into my office." Hades instructed.
Apollo studied Hades' office with the same air of disinterest as he gingerly lowered himself onto the couch, and crossed his legs.
"What brings you here today?"
Apollo rolled his eyes. "You're a therapist. The answer should be obvious, I think."
Hades grit his teeth. "There are various reasons why people seek out therapy. Some need help managing conditions like anxiety or depression. Others may need support dealing with major life changes or trauma. Some may seek ways to improve themselves, or because they feel 'stuck' or dissatisfied with life and need help figuring out why and how to move past that. There's relationship issues, or maybe they need help developing healthy coping mechanisms, among other things."
Apollo pursed his lips and averted his gaze, looking anywhere but directly at Hades. "Yeah, like I said Hermes put me up to this. I don't have any of those issues you just described."
"Uh-huh. We can also just talk about anything you have in mind, no matter how trivial it seems."
A nervous chuckle escaped Apollo. "Maybe therapy just isn't for me. It feels weird baring my soul to a god I barely know."
"But that's the beauty of unburdening yourself to a stranger, or near-stranger in my case. I don't have any preconceived notions about you. I'll listen to whatever you want to share and offer my unbiased opinions, and advice if I have any. You're already here, so why don't we see how this session goes? Afterwards, you can decide if therapy is for you or not," Hades suggested.
"I suppose…" Apollo relented, his expression sullen. He clasped his hands together and tapped one sandaled foot on the floor. "The thing is, I think I'm losing my sparkle."
"Pardon?" Hades frowned.
Apollo sucked in a breath and finally looked Hades dead in the eye, his expression severe.
"I think I'm losing my sparkle. My mojo. My magic touch, if you will," he said with a flourish of his hands. "Every romantic relationship I pursue tanks horribly. Hyacinthus. Coronis. Cassandra. Daphne!" He said, ticking off his fingers with each name. "At least Hyacinthus has the valid excuse of death; it's not like he wanted to leave me. But what about the others? I'm a god! There's no greater compliment to one's beauty and personality than being pursued by a god, especially me! And yet it's been rejection after rejection. Coronis had the audacity to cheat on me with a mortal! Look at me. What mortal man could possibly compare?"
"You think your failed relationships are because you're losing your 'sparkle'?" Hades asked, making air quotes with his fingers.
"Not literally," Apollo scoffed. "But I'm the god of light, music, and poetry amongst other things. My radiance alone should leave them so dazzled that no other lover could compare. Eros may be the god of love, but I should be declared the god of romance. Have you ever heard any of the poetry or songs I've composed?"
"Can't say that I have," was Hades' dry reply.
Apollo harrumphed. "Let me put it this way: everything Orpheus knows, I taught him." He slumped in his seat, arms crossed and eyebrows furrowed. "I give so much of myself to them. My affection, my blessings, gifts ... I'd give them the moon and stars if they asked. So why doesn't anyone want me?" he asked petulantly.
Beneath the layers of frustration and offense at his so-called rejections, Hades could sense lingering hurt and loneliness.
"Could it be that your prospective lovers are wary of accepting your courtship because you have a known history of not taking rejection well? Didn't you make everyone believe that a Trojan princess was insane after you blessed her with the gift of prophecy?"
"Because she rejected me after leading me on for weeks! Cassandra used me to gain power and thought she could toss me aside like common trash once she got what she wanted. You think I was going to let her get away with disrespecting me like that? Never!" Apollo sneered.
Hades released a deep sigh. "She was a powerless mortal, Apollo. Did she coerce you into bestowing her with the gift of prophecy?"
Silence from Apollo.
"And wasn't there another incident? A nymph who chose to be turned into a tree because you refused to take no for an answer?" Hades continued.
Apollo's eyes widened, and began to glow. "What happened to no preconceived notions and biases? You're sounding judgmental as hell to me right now. Clearly, you know more about me than you led me to believe," he accused.
"Just the bare bones surface-level information. Rumours do trickle down to the Underworld every so often, especially the scandalous ones. But I'd like to hear your side of things. And I promise you, I'm not judging."
He was totally judging, but saying so would not only be unprofessional it would be hypocritical. Hades was aware didn't have a moral leg to stand on, considering how his courtship with Persephone began.
Apollo leaned forward, his beautiful face twisted in a scowl. Hades imagined that gazing upon Apollo in the throes of intense emotion was akin to staring directly into the midsummer sun.
"It was Hermes, wasn't it? What good is a loose-lipped divine messenger to any of us? I swear to Gaia, when I see him next—"
"Calm down, Apollo. I didn't get my information from Hermes. People, even gods, sprites, and everything in between love to gossip."
The sun god slumped back into his seat, and Hades noticed scorch marks on the armrests of his couch where Apollo's hands had just been. His eye twitched. Looks like he'd have to replace them too.
"In my defence, it was all Eros' fault. I wouldn't have been so dogged in my pursuit of Daphne if he hadn't struck me with his blasted arrow. Who knew he was so thin-skinned and couldn't take a joke?" He clicked his tongue. "Daphne would have totally caved if that over-grown cherub didn't pierce her with an arrow that made her detest the very sight of me. I'm the victim in all this!"
"Daphne has to spend the rest of her life as a tree," Hades deadpanned.
"That was her choice. She's the one who begged her father to help her out. Look, I feel sorry for her, I do. But there's nothing I can do for her now, except wearing this laurel wreath in her honour. I'm heartbroken too. It might have been a petty revenge trick by Eros, but my feelings were genuine. Time and again, fate has shown me that I am unworthy of being loved."
"That's not true. You may be unlucky in love, but that doesn't mean no one loves you. You have your parents and Artemis. And it sounds like you share a strong bond with Hermes," Hades gently reminded him.
Apollo scoffed. "Of course mum and Artemis love me; it's wired in their DNA or something 'cause we're close family. And the only thing Zeus loves more than himself and power is sex... and Athena," he jokingly added.
"Not all mothers are wired to love their children, Apollo. You could argue that she has to love you because that's the law of nature... or you could look at it another way?"
Apollo raised his eyebrows in silent question.
"Leto chooses to love you day after day, faults and all. Her love for you is unconditional and constant. Doesn't that count for something?" Hades asked.
"I guess," Apollo pouted. Less than a second later, his expression brightened. "You know what? You're right. At least I didn't get Hera for a mother. And don't think I didn't notice you didn't say anything about Zeus' love being unconditional," he smirked.
Hades wisely kept his mouth shut.
"Still though, as thankful as I am for Mother and Artemis, I want someone of my own. Someone who chooses to love me because they want to—not because biology dictates so. I want a partner, like you have with Persephone. Is that so much to ask for?"
Hades shook his head.
"Right?" Apollo exclaimed. "What am I doing wrong? Should I tone down my godliness? Pursue another god, maybe? But that's… yeesh!" He shuddered. "That's not a dating pool I want to dip my toes into. Too much drama. Maybe I should just focus on my duties and stay celibate. Seems to be working out well for my sister and Hestia."
"Closing yourself off from the possibility of love is not the answer. I think you have a tendency to lose yourself in the idea of love; so when you develop an interest in someone, you jump in feet first without thinking and go all in when pursuing them. You need to remember that you're not the only one in the relationship and learn to take your partner or prospective partner's feelings and needs into consideration."
"Zeus rarely thinks of anyone but himself, and yet he has lovers falling at his feet to please him," Apollo pointed out.
"Your father is not the healthiest example to follow. And his lovers aren't always willing either," Hades reminded him.
"Literally no one in my life has given me a healthy blueprint to follow. Mother allowed herself to be seduced and knocked up by Zeus. My sister likes to pretend she's above 'trivial matters' like romantic love and lust, even though we both know better. Not one god I know has had a healthy love life; something fucked up always happens to ruin it," Apollo stated, his tone defeated.
"Let's forget about everyone else's relationships and focus on yours. I believe most people are deserving of love, Apollo. However, being deserving and being entitled to love are two different things," Hades said, holding up one finger on each hand. "Right now, you fall into the second category."
Apollo started to argue, but Hades interrupted him.
"If you don't think you're entitled to love, then why didn't you quietly take back the blessing you bestowed upon Cassandra? You could have taken the rejection with grace, revoked her gift of prophecy since you no longer favoured her, and moved on with your life. Instead you cursed her; isolated her by making her appear a lunatic to her community. What you did was vindictive and cruel, don't you think?"
"I mean… not too cruel. She was vindicated in the end when all her prophecies came true," Apollo shrugged.
"That doesn't make up for all the pain and suffering you caused her in the meantime. All because she rejected your advances. The punishment did not fit the crime, in my opinion."
"In my opinion, it does. As younglings, we're all taught that gods are as wrathful as they are benevolent, and that we must never allow a mortal to think themselves equal to us. Which is why we dole out punishment for their hubris," Apollo defended.
"But what Cassandra did was not an act of hubris. Would you rather she faked her affections just to appease you?"
"Of course not!" Apollo snapped.
Hades clasped his hands. "How did you react to Coronis' infidelity?"
Apollo's mouth flattened. "I had Artemis deal with her."
"Deal with her, how?"
A muscle flickered in Apollo's chiselled jaw. "She killed her."
"So, you struggle with rejection and choose to react to these perceived slights with harsh punishments or control," Hades said. "Why do you think that is?"
"This has all been a waste of my time. If I wanted to sit around and listen to how much of a horrible person I am, I would have visited Hera." Apollo stood, ready to leave, but Hades' next statement stopped him short.
"Let's talk about Hyacinthus."
A pulse of bright light filled the room, rendering Hades blind for a few seconds. When his vision cleared, Apollo was back in his seat, a slightly manic smile stretched across his face. The smile was at odds with his handsome, gentle features. A god of light who harboured some darkness within.
"What about him?" Apollo demanded.
"He's the only one among the people you listed earlier who had a legitimate reason for leaving you."
"He didn't leave me. He died," Apollo growled.
"I'm sorry for your loss," Hades said.
"Don't be. It's my fault he died. I killed him… We were having discus throwing competition when Zephyrus intervened out of jealousy. Hyacinthus rejected him and chose to be with me, and he couldn't stand to see us happy." Apollo's throat worked, a deep sadness shadowing his eyes as he fiddled with his fingers. "I am an oracular god you'd think I would have seen that coming. You'd think I would have seen all my romantic failures coming, but here I am… talking about my feelings to the lord of the dead. What a joke I am," he chuckled bitterly.
"Hm. So you've been carrying the blame for Hyacinthus' death this whole time, even knowing who was truly responsible," Hades said.
Apollo fell silent for a while, a distant look in his eyes. Finally, his mouth curled into an insincere smile.
"Hey, maybe I'm not meant to find love. You know what they say about flying too close to the sun, right? Maybe the sun is destined to remain isolated, blazing hot and bright, showering its warmth on everyone else and receiving none in return."
"That's a rather bleak outlook on life. You just need to work on yourself, Apollo. Find better ways to deal with rejection. Learn to look before leaping. And you need work on deconstructing this entitlement you seem to feel about others' affection. I can help you with that."
Apollo seemed to consider it and shook his head. "Nope. This is depressing as all hell. I'll stick to my poetry, I think. I may not be able to find true love, but my music and verses ensure my bed is never cold. There's a pretty little sea nymph who caught my eye a few days ago; I composed a lyric poem in her honour. Listen and tell me what you think…"
Hours later, Hades still had Apollo's stupid songs and poems stuck in his head. He'd overstayed his welcome, reciting his works, bragging about his silver tongue, and forcing Hades to offer feedback on the compositions he was working on.
All attempts to redirect the session were thwarted, and when Hades tried to get him to commit to another appointment, Apollo simply teleported out of the office.