Silence. Dead silence.
The densely packed chat feed suddenly ground to a complete halt. On the screen, the chubby viewer's expression morphed from confusion, to a dazed stupor, and finally, to pure terror. He looked down at the little blue beast he had affectionately called his "wife" and "daughter" for years, and then back at Miles's unwavering face on the stream.
"M-Male?" The chubby guy's voice trembled like a strangled duck. "Streamer, are you... are you joking? He's... he's blue! A male Nidoran is purple! That's just common sense! And he's so cute! So gentle! How could he be male?!"
Kieth finally snapped out of his daze, pointing at Miles and cursing. "Bullshit! You're throwing away common sense just to farm views? Blue is female, purple is male—even a three-year-old knows this! You're pointing at a blue Nidoran and calling it a guy. Are you colorblind or just plain blind?"
Facing their doubts, Miles didn't panic in the slightest.
"Common sense?" Miles sneered, delivering a crushing blow from a true professional. "Common sense is meant to be broken. You only know that a regular Nidoran is purple and a regular Nidoran is blue. But did you know that in this world, there is an extremely rare phenomenon known as Shiny Pokémon?"
Miles held up a single finger, beginning his educational—or rather, persuasive—spiel. "When a Nidoran is Shiny, his colors invert, turning him blue! Meanwhile, a Shiny Nidoran becomes pink! What you have right there is a one-in-a-million Shiny Nidoran whose coloration happens to perfectly match a standard female!"
"Still don't believe me?" Miles looked at the two men, who were furiously shaking their heads, and threw out his ironclad proof. "First, look at the ears. Although a female's ears are large, the edges are rounded. Your Nidoran, despite being well-disguised, still retains the sharp keratin layer at the tips of the ears—a trait unique to males! Second, look at the poison spikes. The spikes on a female's back are relatively small. Yours might not have many spikes, but each one is thick and powerful. That's a characteristic males evolved specifically for fighting!"
"Third, and most importantly!" Miles pointed directly at the blue Pokémon's eyes. "His Ability is Rivalry! Why do you think he attacks every male Nidoran that comes close? Because in his eyes, they aren't potential mates; they are the same sex! They're rivals trying to steal his territory! That's why his fur stands on end and he goes on the offensive. If this were a female facing down an excellent male, even if she wasn't interested, she wouldn't strike to kill every single time, would she?"
This logical, well-founded breakdown completely silenced both the chubby guy and Kieth.
The chubby guy's hands began to shake. He looked at the "wife" in his arms and suddenly felt like he was holding a live grenade. "Im... impossible... I don't believe it..." His entire worldview was collapsing in real-time. "I've slept in the same bed with him for so long... I even bought him little pink skirts... He... he's a guy? This defies science! This is too cruel!"
Although Kieth was equally shocked, he was still stubborn. "Streamer, these are all just speculations! You can spin whatever story you want, but I won't buy it unless you have solid proof!"
"Solid proof?" Miles smiled. He had been waiting for those exact words. "Getting proof is simple. Weren't you trying to breed them? Let's change our approach. Put your Nidoran down on the mat, but don't command him to court the blue one. Command him to provoke! Command him to fight! If it's a female facing a male's provocation, she might get scared and try to avoid conflict. But if it's a male—and a male with the Rivalry Ability at that..."
Miles's gaze sharpened. "Facing a same-sex provocation, his DNA will kick in! His testosterone will explode! He won't hesitate to rush up and engage your Nidoran in a true, one-on-one man's battle! Do you dare to try?"
Kieth froze for a moment, glancing over at his friend. The chubby guy's face was ashen, but he gritted his teeth, having made a desperate decision. "Try! We have to try! I refuse to believe the wife I've raised for three years has magically turned into my bro! Kieth, let him go! Have your Nidoran bite him! If my baby doesn't fight back, then the streamer is just spouting nonsense!"
"Alright!" Kieth didn't waste any time. He tossed his purple Nidoran onto the mat and barked a command. "Nidoran, use Leer! Then rush in and provoke it!"
"Nido!" 'Take this!'
Kieth's Nidoran was thoroughly confused. Wasn't this supposed to be a blind date? Why were they fighting now? Still, out of obedience to his trainer, he complied. He widened his eyes, pulled a fierce, intimidating grimace at the blue "beauty" on the mat, and let out a challenging cry.
The next second, everyone witnessed a scene they would never forget for the rest of their lives.
The blue "Nidoran," who had been lying on the mat looking soft, peaceful, and demure, completely changed the moment he heard that provocation and saw the grimace. His previously "gentle" ruby eyes instantly erupted with a chilling, ferocious glint—the kind of absolute ruthlessness you'd only see in the eyes of a mafia enforcer!
His muscles snapped taut, and his drooping ears shot straight up like antennas. A visible red aura exploded from his body: the unmistakable visual signature of the Rivalry Ability activating.
"Nido!!!" 'Fuck! You dare act tough in front of me?!'
A rough, hoarse roar, practically dripping with testosterone, tore out of that tiny, cherry-like mouth. Then, he moved.
He was as fast as lightning! Before Kieth's Nidoran could even process what was happening, the blue figure had closed the distance. He leaped, spun, and unleashed a flying kick!
Double Kick!
Bang! Bang!
Two muffled thuds echoed through the room. Kieth's Nidoran was launched into the air, tracing a perfect parabola before smashing heavily against the far wall and sliding down to the floor like a discarded painting.
Insta-kill! And a brutally one-sided insta-kill at that!
Having finished the job, the blue Nidoran landed smoothly. He shook his head, cast a contemptuous sneer at his defeated opponent in the corner, snorted two plumes of white mist from his nostrils, and casually wiped his nose with a paw. He struck an incredibly arrogant pose.
That posture. That demeanor. That terrifying aura. Where was there even a hint of a "noble lady"? This was clearly a triad street boss!
At that moment, the truth was laid bare. No more words were needed. If this Pokémon were truly female, how could she fight with such brutal efficiency? How could she possess such an overwhelming "I'm the king of the world" presence?
In the livestream, the virtual air seemed to freeze for a full three seconds. Then, an absolute carnival of chaos erupted, wild enough to tear the digital roof off.
On the screen, the "blue enchantress" who had just executed a textbook Double Kick was now resting on his front paws, hind legs slightly bent, flexing in an extremely macho bodybuilding pose. His ruby eyes held absolutely zero gentleness or shyness; they were entirely replaced by the wild, untamed arrogance reserved for shounen anime protagonists. He snorted again, his eyes sweeping over the twitching purple Nidoran in the corner as if to say, 'That's it? You thought you could pick me up? Take a look in the mirror, scrub!'
It was too shocking. Too explosive. And way too... manly.
[System Prompt: Livestream viewership has surpassed 1,500!]
The chat feed broke like a dam, instantly flooding the screen with dense, overlapping layers of text moving so fast it was barely readable.
[Viewer "Kindergarten Food Snatcher": Holy crap!!! That footwork! That power! This guy is a martial arts master! Whose female Nidoran can unleash such a merciless, bloodline-ending kick?]
[Viewer "Melon Eater": I submit! I completely submit! This isn't a Nidoran, this is Arnold Schwarzenegger wearing a loli skin! If this isn't a male, I'll do a handstand and eat my keyboard live on stream!]
[Viewer "Grumpy Bro": HAHAHAHA! I'm dying! Chubby bro, your wife turned into your brother! And a violently abusive brother who can kick you across the room! Surprise!]
[Viewer "Philosophy Master": Bromance at its finest, bro on bro... Chubby bro, this wave is you facing the man head-on!]
[Viewer "Passerby A": God-tier plot twist! W streamer! He could actually see this? Bro has X-ray vision for genders!]
[Viewer "Ruby": ...The explosive muscle power of this 'Nidoran' is indeed a characteristic unique to males. The streamer's eye for detail is unmatched.]
Even the elusive top donator, Ruby, who usually just lurked in the background, dropped a comment praising Miles.
Meanwhile, Miles leaned back in his chair, swirling a half-glass of cold water in his hand, an "everything is under control" smirk playing on his lips. He looked at the completely petrified chubby guy on the screen, his eyes filled with a look of fatherly pity.
"Chubby bro, wake up," Miles said, waving a hand in front of his webcam. "I know this reality is cruel, but we have to face facts. Actions speak louder than words, and your precious baby is most definitely a guy with a handle."
Crack.!!!
It sounded as though a man's very soul had just shattered. The chubby guy (User ID: Nidoran Is My Life) tremblingly lowered his head. He stared at the pink cat-teaser wand resting on the floor—a toy he treated as a treasure and used daily to amuse his "wife." He then turned his head slowly to look at the blue Nidoran, who had just finished asserting his dominance and was now staring back with a proud "praise me, bro" expression.
The chubby guy's lips quivered. His complexion rapidly cycled from flush red, to pale white, to sickly green, before finally settling into the ashen gray of utter despair.
"M... male..." the chubby guy muttered, his voice choked with real tears. "I bought him little pink skirts for three years... I hugged him to sleep every night and called him my wife... I tied cute little bows on his ears..."
"He... he's actually a guy?!" The chubby guy finally broke, clutching his head with both hands as he let out a heart-wrenching wail. "Then what am I?! What have I become?! A pervert?! I don't want to live anymore! My youth! My love! It was all a fucking illusion!!!"
It was a wail so tragic it would make listeners weep—though, naturally, the stream viewers only wanted to laugh harder.
[Viewer "Wicked Map": Hahaha! Forgive me for laughing, but Chubby bro's psychological trauma is probably vast enough to cover the entire downtown region!]
[Viewer "Nutritious Yarn": Don't cry, Chubby bro! Look on the bright side: you lost a wife, but you gained a solid bro! You guys can hit the bathhouse and scrub each other's backs now!]
[Viewer "Forest Fawn": Pfft... This is tragic, but it's so funny. Honestly, this Nidoran endured a lot of humiliation. The fact that he held back for three whole years without kicking Chubby bro to death proves it's true love!]
Watching the chubby guy's entirely lifeless expression, Miles was secretly blooming with joy. However, as a streamer with professional ethics, he decided to offer a few words of comfort—or rather, rub some salt in the wound.
"Ahem. Chubby, don't be so pessimistic," Miles said, clearing his throat and re-engaging his persuasive tone. "You may have lost a 'wife,' but look on the bright side. You just gained a Shiny Nidoran with explosive combat power, S-rank potential, and a one-in-a-million rarity!"