My face landed on an air mattress.
"Ugh… I'm gonna be sick." I rolled over, rubbing my eyes as I tried to push through the nausea. "I'm making it official Goonion law. No portals."
A small chorus with a sarcastic note floated past my ears.
I looked up and found my angel familiar surrounded by several tools. The strange schizotech device Captain Cold had used for the mirror portal hovered at the epicenter of it all.
"You couldn't have gotten me out sooner?"
The tiny angel's face remained completely placid, but a harsh hum, which I was pretty sure was the equivalent of a scoff, made my ears twitch. A wrench floated threateningly above my head.
"…Wonderful timing. Truly, you are my number one familiar."
The wrench and Simmy floated away to do whatever strange little Simmy things I imagined Simmy did.
I groaned as I simply leaned back into the mattress. The comforting appearance of my own damn room was at least a balm to my soul.
Well, that and other things…
[Feat Achieved! A Slap in the Beak]
[+1 Silver Gacha Ticket]
[Rolling Silver Gacha]
[Familiar Contract]
|Rare Item|
A contract that allows those who sign it to be registered in your gacha as a familiar you can treat like any other. They must sign the contract while knowing what it does, otherwise it does not work.
Oh neat. Would've been nice to have with the Amazo, but fortune not extending toward my rolls was just part of the package.
There were a few candidates I could think of, but… I'd think about it later. My eyes felt heavy, and this was enough excitement for one night.
My gaze drifted down to my phone as I yawned.
Fortune's Lover's boosted effect was going to end in barely a minute, so, well.
Might as well use it.
I texted Mr. Wayne's number an apology and an invitation to drinks.
Hopefully, the billionaire wasn't too mad.
Don't fail me now, luck…
—
Bruce frowned at the Batcomputer.
Tonight's events had been… trying, to say the least.
Still, they could have been so much worse. Amazos were difficult to put down, even with a full group of League members working together. The fact that the rogue android and a seemingly alien monster had duelled each other in Gotham and caused so little civilian or property damage was nothing short of a miracle.
There were only a few notable casualties, with the large majority being League of Shadows members. Bruce didn't condone killing, but neither would he mourn assassins who had been trying to harm his kids.
Rather, this so-called "Suicide Squad" was much more of a headache.
Rudimentary interrogations had revealed the sheer scope of Amanda Waller's schemes.
Bruce didn't bother hiding his scowl as he looked over the list of crimes the various villains had handed over to him. The attempted theft of an Amazo for the government was simply the top of a long, long list.
It would be difficult with her backing, but with this much evidence, Bruce would make damn sure Waller suffered for this.
Still, as much as he wanted to get the League's legal team and himself on the case, the final issue of the night still stuck out.
"Anything?" Bruce asked.
"Nothing," Clark replied as he flew around Gotham, his head camera streaming readings and video directly to the Batcomputer. "The scanner hasn't picked up any Boom Tube signatures as far as I can see."
"Check the—"
"Bruce…" Clark's worried voice cut in. "Maybe you should hit the hay. It's almost morning. Get some sleep. I've got the time, so I'll keep looking."
Bruce scowled. "I need to—"
"A wonderful idea, Mr. Kent."
Alfred strode into the cave, shooting Bruce a disapproving look.
"It would be terribly crass if you missed today's appointments because you were sleep deprived."
"Someone needs to play overwatch in case of another incursion," Bruce tried to argue. "The city—"
"How fortunate, then, that we have someone right here." Alfred smiled. "Master Dick, if you would please."
Dick strode into the cave wearing a bathrobe and holding a cup of coffee. His son shot him a wry smile.
"Sorry, boss man. Orders from the top."
Bruce opened his mouth to retort, but a single raised eyebrow from Alfred stared back at him.
"…Fine." He pushed his chair away from the Batcomputer, taking off his mask to massage his forehead. "Make sure to keep the sensors running and maintain the pipeline between the Watchtower—"
Alfred grabbed him by the shoulders and began steering him out of the cave.
"I know the drill. Don't worry." Dick waved a hand as he took the seat in front of the Batcomputer.
Bruce just sighed as he left the cave.
"Would you prefer to rest, or have a light meal first?" Alfred asked. "Master Todd and Ms. Cain are currently in the dining room having an early breakfast."
If Jason was here, then perhaps Bruce could at least get some more work done by discussing Jean Valjean's abilities while they ate.
"Some food would do me good, I think."
—
As stressful and dangerous as being a hero could be, Bruce would admit there was probably no other job in the world where you saw more interesting and strange situations.
"He really made them piss themselves?" Jason cackled as he fell back in his chair.
Cassandra nodded as she giggled. "You should've seen all their faces when Damian asked why their pants were stained."
Bruce snorted.
He could imagine, quite clearly, how Damian would matter-of-factly interrogate villains over why their pants were yellow.
"Ha! That would've been a riot." Jason took a bite of his eggs as he chuckled. "Next time I meet Jean, I should ask for more details."
"Would you mind passing along some additional questions?" Bruce asked nonchalantly.
"Oh?" Jason raised an eyebrow at him. "Is the oh-so-great Batman not trusting my social skills? I'm so hurt."
Jason fluttered his eyelashes and even drew a fake tear.
Cassandra nearly choked on her cereal at the horrid acting.
"Yes," Bruce said dryly. "Especially when you thought it was a smart idea to give him my AI's phone number."
"Please, that thing doesn't even work yet, so I bet…" Jason paused as he looked straight at him, eyes narrowing, no doubt reading his expression just as Bruce had taught him. "Oh. Oh! Hahaha!"
Sometimes Bruce regretted teaching all his kids how to cold read.
"What happened?" Jason grinned as he leaned forward. "It must've been hilarious if you're acting like this."
The denial was already on Bruce's lips, but he failed to see the betrayal coming from behind.
"Jean somehow got the AI version to side against 'Batman' when he called it," Cassandra interjected. "AI Bruce ran him over the coals, too."
Jason leaned back, started chuckling, and then devolved into full-belly laughter.
"How do you even know?" Bruce glared at her.
Cassandra only smiled at him, miming zipping her lips and throwing away the key.
Goddammit…
"Anyways." Bruce shot Jason a look, even as he continued to giggle. "This is a prime example of Jean Valjean's 'luck,' and we need to get a better grasp on it. I was hoping you could get some more insight from him directly."
Jason wiped a tear from the corner of his eye before shrugging. "Most of our chats don't really go into stuff like that. We have an understanding. He pulls some insane shit, but it gets results."
"That's not particularly helpful information, Jason."
"Fine." Jason rolled his eyes, dragging the word out. "There are a few things I noticed. First thing, it's definitely not conscious. He's not aiming it." "
Bruce nodded. That matched his own read of the situation. The call last night had seemed coincidental on Jean's part, as absurd as that was.
"It also seems like his luck extends to what's considered 'fortunate' for him as well," Jason continued, leaning back in his chair. "I only noticed recently, but managing my territory and dealing with the gangs has been running smooth as silk since I joined up."
Bruce's expression flattened slightly. "Minimum city range, then."
"Minimum?" Cassandra asked.
"Possibly wider." Bruce frowned. "If his luck can influence events around his allies and contacts, even when he isn't directly involved, then the scope may be much, much larger than we assumed."
"Gotham has been getting suspiciously less awful lately." Jason snorted.
"That is part of the concern."
"Of course it is." Jason shook his head. "Only you could look at Gotham getting better and go, 'Hmm, suspicious.'"
"Perhaps if we compare incidents before and after your first meeting with him, we could establish a clearer pattern."
"Perhaps," Alfred cut in smoothly, "you should finish your meal and get some rest."
Alfred set a warm cup of milk in front of him while shooting Bruce a disapproving glare. "I hope it has not slipped your mind that you have several appointments today. If you wish to figure out Master Valjean so badly, you could simply ask him during your meeting later."
"Meeting?"
Alfred tilted his head. "Did you not message me stating that you had accepted a friendly appointment with the Union Leader?"
Bruce pulled out his phone and checked the AI's logs.
He went very still.
The AI had not only accepted Jean's invitation but had also messaged Alfred to update his schedule.
"Amazing…" Jason, barely holding back his laughter. "Batman outplayed by Bruce Wayne."
Cassandra broke down laughing over her cereal.
Goddammit…
***
Comments and Thoughts would be greatly appreciated. Likes are like a drug to me and boost my creative juices.
I have advanced chapters on Pa tre on/daisyberry if you wanna read ahead.