Chapter 16 — A Man Can't Say He's Not Capable!
"Incredible… absolutely incredible! Sending a Tailed Beast Bomb flying with a single kick—and without using any ninjutsu at all! And subduing the One-Tail Shukaku with nothing but taijutsu… I've lived this long, and this is the first time I've seen a monster like that."
Zetsu had witnessed everything from beginning to end. From the moment Shukaku fell into a rampage to the instant it was finally sealed once more, nothing had escaped his attention. Every shockwave, every clash, every impossible feat of strength had been recorded in his memory.
Compared to Sasori's earlier defeat, the emergence of this taijutsu monster posed a far greater threat. Sasori had been powerful, yes—but he had ultimately been predictable. This newcomer, however, was something else entirely. An unknown variable.
And for a plan as delicate and long-awaited as the "Save Mother" operation, unknown variables were dangerous.
Very dangerous.
At that moment, a man clad in a black cloak stood nearby with his arms folded across his chest. His face was hidden behind an orange-striped, one-eyed mask, and his voice carried a cold edge as he spoke.
"Zetsu… no one here looks more like a monster than you."
Zetsu chuckled dryly at the remark, his mismatched face twisting slightly.
"By the way," the masked man continued, "do you think the one who defeated Sasori and took the ring might be the same person who subdued the Tailed Beast?"
Zetsu didn't hesitate for even a moment.
"Impossible. The main forces behind Sasori's defeat were almost certainly Chiyo and Jiraiya. As for that Konoha brat… he looked weak. Barely worth mentioning."
"I see…"
The masked man deliberately dragged out his response, as though lost in thought.
Wasn't I once just a snot-nosed Konoha brat too?
Behind the mask, his visible eye narrowed slightly.
"Zetsu. From now on, keep an eye on Sarutobi Seiki. I have a feeling he's not as simple as you think."
"You're the commander," Zetsu replied casually. "You make the decisions."
Though he didn't argue, he added with a faint frown,
"Still, Jiraiya is always with that kid. I won't be able to get too close."
"That's fine," the masked man said calmly. "Jiraiya can be handled… by that snake."
Inside the mask's eyehole, a three-tomoe Sharingan slowly spun, gleaming faintly in the darkness.
"What about the ring?" Zetsu asked. "Shouldn't we retrieve it?"
"There's no rush. Let him hold onto it for now." The masked man's voice remained steady and indifferent. "With the winds of the Third Shinobi War beginning to stir, the Akatsuki's priority is expanding our strength."
The air suddenly warped.
Space twisted like a disturbed reflection on water, and in an instant, the masked man vanished completely, leaving no trace of his presence behind.
Zetsu clicked his tongue in annoyance.
"Tch… troublesome opponents always end up being my responsibility."
He paused, his expression turning thoughtful.
"Obito… you're still too inexperienced. If newly sprouted nails aren't pulled out early, they'll grow into real problems."
His body slowly sank downward, melting into the earth as though the ground were liquid. Within seconds, he had disappeared completely.
---
Sunagakure — Outside the Women's Sand Bath
Jiraiya stood just outside the women's sand bath, clutching a notebook and brush with the intensity of a man conducting vital academic research.
His eyes gleamed with excitement as he scribbled furiously.
"Magnificent… absolutely magnificent…!"
The drifting steam carried faint silhouettes through the thin wooden walls, and Jiraiya's imagination filled in the rest with alarming enthusiasm.
"This… this is heaven!"
Just as Pakura reached up to loosen the towel around her shoulders, her sharp eyes suddenly caught sight of movement outside.
Her expression instantly darkened.
With a flick of both hands—
Two blazing red fireballs shot forward like meteors.
BOOM!
The bathhouse wall exploded outward, wooden planks shattering into splinters as the blast tore through it. The resulting shockwave struck Jiraiya head-on and sent him flying through the air like a ragdoll.
"Who's there?!"
Pakura stepped forward, eyes blazing with fury, ready to continue the attack—
But then she saw where Jiraiya landed.
He plunged straight into the nearby Hell Bath.
Pakura immediately clasped her hands together solemnly.
"May you rest in peace."
Jiraiya fell through the thick mist and landed headfirst into the burning sand.
"GAAAAAHHH—!"
He shot upright almost instantly, his face already flushed bright red from the intense heat.
"This is… Steamer Hell?! No! I haven't confessed to Tsunade yet—I can't die here!"
He struggled desperately, clawing his way upward until his head finally emerged from the scorching sand. His face looked like an overcooked sweet potato, and steam practically rose from his skin.
"As expected of one of the Legendary Sannin," someone commented approvingly. "Challenging Hell-level heat on your very first sand bath."
Rasa and Baki stood nearby, watching with admiration.
Yashamaru crouched at a safe distance, shivering. He didn't dare go any closer.
"Well… so this is Hell-level?" Jiraiya panted. "I think… it could be even hotter!"
"If you can't handle it," someone said lazily, "don't force yourself."
Seiki floated past on his back, drifting through the sand bath as though it were a gentle stream instead of a furnace.
"Can't handle it?" Jiraiya barked. "A man can't say he's not capable!"
His expression was utterly resolute—like a warrior marching toward certain death.
Unfortunately, his body told a very different story. Sweat poured off him in streams, and his skin had turned an alarming shade of red.
Baki, an experienced sand bath regular, laughed.
"It is cooler than usual today."
He picked up a large scoop of water.
"I'll add some steam."
Before Jiraiya could object—
FWOOSH!
The water splashed onto the burning sand, instantly erupting into a massive cloud of scalding steam.
Baki froze.
"…Oops. I might've added a bit too much."
The temperature skyrocketed instantly.
Aside from Seiki—who began swimming faster and faster for some reason—everyone else froze in place, locked in a silent battle of endurance.
They were clearly suffering.
But no one wanted to be the first to leave.
After all—
"A man can't say he's not capable!"
Five minutes passed.
Rasa, unused to sand baths, was already nearing his limit. His throat felt dry, and his vision swam faintly.
But he was the Kazekage.
He had to endure.
Meanwhile, Jiraiya leaned weakly against the edge of the bath, his eyes unfocused.
Is this how it ends…? he wondered faintly. Am I, Jiraiya, really going to die in a meaningless heat contest?
No! This is a matter of a man's pride!
The Sand shinobi quietly circulated chakra through their bodies, stimulating their cells to resist the heat.
Ten minutes passed.
Rasa finally reached his breaking point and began considering an escape.
The bathroom… yes, that's a perfectly reasonable excuse…
Just as he started to raise his hand—
"I need to use the bathroom."
Baki stood up first.
He walked out calmly, as though nothing were wrong.
Rasa's eye twitched.
Damn you, Baki!
As soon as he stepped outside, Baki turned back and flashed a triumphant grin—the smile of a survivor.
"I'll kill you…" Rasa muttered under his breath.
Too embarrassed to use the same excuse, he could only remain where he was, silently enduring.
Fifteen minutes.
Even the Sand shinobi reinforcing themselves with chakra began to fall one by one. Some fainted outright and had to be dragged away.
The steam only made everything worse.
Eventually, only four remained.
The Fourth Kazekage Rasa.
The Konoha master and student—Jiraiya and Sarutobi Seiki.
And Ebizō, seated quietly in meditation.
Though no words were spoken, their eyes burned with fierce determination.
This was no longer just a sand bath.
This was war.
Rasa quietly formed hand seals beneath the sand.
"Magnet Release: Gold Sand Armor!"
Golden sand flowed over his submerged body, forming a protective layer.
His plan was simple—insulate himself from the heat.
Unfortunately…
The gold sand was just as hot.
"This is bad…" Rasa thought grimly. "I'm going to lose…"
His face grew redder and redder. Wisps of smoke even began to rise from his short hair.
Just as he reached his absolute limit—
"Dear! Let's go home!"
Karura's voice called from the women's bath next door.
Rasa nearly wept.
Karura… my love…
You saved me.
"Well… it seems I must withdraw," he said solemnly.
He stepped out of the bath with as much dignity as he could manage.
The moment the cool air touched his skin felt like salvation itself.
Nearby, a single tear slid down Jiraiya's cheek—the tear of a lonely bachelor.
It evaporated instantly.
"Grandpa Ebizō… are you still alive?"
Seiki poked Ebizō experimentally.
No response.
"Granny Chiyo! Your brother passed out!"
Seiki dragged Ebizō out of the sand.
"My little brother!"
A cry rang out instantly from the women's bath.
Moments later, Chiyo came rushing over in a pink swimsuit without hesitation.
"Pff—!"
"OH NO—!"
Seiki and Jiraiya both took catastrophic mental damage at the exact same time.
This moment would be forever etched into the darkest corners of their memories.
Seiki collapsed on the spot.
Jiraiya toppled over the edge of the bath, unconscious.
Thus ended the battle of masculine pride—
With no victor.
"A man doesn't need to force it," Yashamaru murmured as he passed by, writing thoughtfully in his notebook.
He paused before adding the final line:
"After all… before Granny Chiyo, no man can stand tall."