Emerson was a mosquito- A blood-sucking, persistent, buzzing, and impossible to ignore insect.
He had ridden alongside the carriage for the last three leagues, leaning over his saddle to peer through the window and the sight had never been so distracting.
"Lady Olivine misses you a lot, you know."
"I miss her too."
He was talking incessantly, his voice a smooth, distracting melody.
I watched from my position at the head of the column, my hand tightening on my reins every time Ardelle leaned closer to the window to listen.
"And then," I heard Emerson's laughter carry over the wind.
"The Duke realized he was bowing to a common stable hand in the dark. The scandal nearly toppled the house!"
Ardelle didn't laugh, but she was listening. She was engaged.
She was finding a world in his words that I had never offered her. Every second he spent with her felt like a theft and that was it.
"Aldwin. I need your… flairs."
He smirked, "I thought we had a deal."
"For women. Not this. Get to work."
"As you wish."
"My Lord, I require your 'expert' opinion," Aldwin called, slowly his horse and turning to Emerson, "Let the commander keep his bride engaged."
Emerson only chuckled, a knowing glint in his eyes.
"Of course, Commander. Duty calls. Do try not to bore the Lady to death in my absence, Kaldric,"
He galloped off, and I pulled my horse level with the carriage window.
I intended to scold her, to tell her that a Lady of the North does not entertain the flatteries of Southern mosquitoes.
But when I looked inside, the words died in my throat.
Ardelle's head was low. Her hat was tugged down so far it shadowed her entire face, her small frame curled into the corner of the carriage.
"What happened? You have been silent for a while now." I demanded, my tone harsher than I intended.
"Are you not going to raise your head and watch the sight?"
She shook her head in denial.
"The pass opens up here. You are always intrigued by the height. You always watch the treeline when you are with me." I commented, waiting for her to react.
She lowered her head more, a sign of gloom. The one she had been carrying for the past days.
"No," she whispered, trying to control herself, "I only wished to do that on the horse."
She didn't look up but the sorrow in it was transparent to tell the reason for her constant sadness.
"The only warmth I had with you... the only time I felt truly close to you... was in the saddle. And you took that away, too." She covered her face with hand, letting out a miserable sobbing.
Her voice, a fragile sound that bypassed my armor and aimed straight for my heart.
"I don't want to look at anything– not even you. I don't want this carriage, I do not care for my wounds, It is just another cellar. I would rather see nothing at all when you are not here to tug my hat down."
The silence that followed was deafening. I looked at the top of her hat, the image of her reaching for my hand in the cave flashing through my mind.
I had put her in here to keep her safe, but in doing so, I had extinguished the very spark I had been trying to protect.
My gauntlet felt heavy and clumsy as I hooked my finger under the brim of her hat and tugged it upward for the first time, forcing her to look at me.
"The view is beautiful, Ardelle," I said in a low but gentle tone, carefully lingering my fingers around her neck for a heartbeat longer.
"Do not miss it just to spite me."
Her eyes were rimmed with red, her expression one of quiet, exhausted resignation. My thumb pressed on her cheek, removing the tear before I pulled back, my throat tight.
"Once you are all healed, I will place you back on the horse myself. Is that enough to erase that gloom?" I finally turned to her though she could not see my face due to the helm.
She stared at me for a few seconds, removing my wrist gradually with a pout, the twinkle reviving, "Only if you do it with 'one' hand."
"Deal, My Lady."
I didn't wait for her answer. I spurred my war toward the front of the line, my mind a chaotic storm of strategy and a woman's tears.
I had to be a Pillar. I had to be stone.
But as the afternoon sun caught the peaks, I found myself slowing, my gaze drifting back to the carriage.
From a distance, I saw her. She had finally looked out the window.
Her small fingers tentatively played with a single mountain flower that I had tossed through the bars when she wasn't looking with a smile.
A small, genuine smile touched her lips as she traced the petals. It was the first bit of light I had seen on her face since the night of the coup.
I felt a strange, terrifying warmth bloom in my own chest, a sensation that defied every vow I had ever made to my mother.
"What are you focused on, Commander?" Aldwin smirked, teasing me but I was too busy… admiring.
"The sight is… truly fascinating," I murmured to the empty air, a grim, private smile tugging at my own mouth. "I should take a look, too."
Later, we stopped to camp
The atmosphere of the camp was overflowing with the scent of roasting meat and the biting chill of the night, but the true cold was radiating from the center of the clearing where I sat.
Emerson had been hovering near my shoulder for the last hour, his silver gaze over me constantly, studying me.
"You watched her, Kaldric, I saw that look. You softened." he whispered, his eyes gleaming with an impish delight.
"You're beginning to enjoy the way she looks at that flower, aren't you? You're beginning to wonder what those lips taste like when they aren't trembling with fear, no?"
"You must be reading too many romance books that every gesture seems intimate to you." I replied monotonously, wiping my armor clean.
He must be out of his mind. Why would I? I wasn't capable of it in the first place.
"Why should I be? When I could witness it practically. The crack, you know."
My mind snapped. A roar of defiance surged through me, drowning out my mother's warnings and the King's laws.
"The crack, huh?" I asked, raising my brows, challenging when he had decided to test my nerves and tonight, I had the perfect response to the 'crack' he mentioned.
'I will show him exactly what he wants to see. The crack.' I thought, an unforeseen darkness surrounding me.
'And then, I will show him why he should fear it.'
I stood abruptly, and signaled Aldwin who was baffled by the sudden call and came to me. I led him into the shadows of the supply wagons, away from the prying eyes of the scouts.
"Commander?" Aldwin asked, his brow furrowed. "The perimeter is secure, but the men are—"
"Alwin, Take a flagon of the heavy Northern ale. The spiced kind. Give it to Ardelle." I interrupted, my voice low.
"Ensure she drinks enough to forget the carriage. Enough to forget everything. You are close to her, she will listen to you."
Aldwin stared at me, his mouth falling open in a rare display of shock.
"Sir? The Lady is still recovering. To get her... drunk? Now? In the middle of a high-risk transit?"
"It is an order, Aldwin," I hissed, leaning into his space. "Do it. Now."
He hesitated, then bowed his head and disappeared.
I walked back to the central fire, the heart of the camp where the lords and officers gathered. Zack smirked when I came.
"Oh, you're here? I thought you would stay with your bride."
"This is no time for domesticities."
I sat down on a log, my claymore resting between my knees, my posture a picture of perfect discipline. I was the spectacle. I was the bait, continuing my night while holding a goblet of wine.
I felt Emerson's gaze on me, curious and sharp. He sensed the shift, the lingering pride and narrowed his eyes.
Eventually, the moment I had been waiting for arrived.
Ardelle emerged, supported slightly by a confused-looking maid. Her cheeks were beautifully red, her emerald eyes unfocused, searching around.
"My Lady, careful–"
"Hush. I will not spend another second in that cage-like carriage."
She was swaying, her movements loose and swaying in a way that was entirely foreign to the timid girl who had spent the days hiding under a hat.
She stopped, grinning at the maid, "I am a fairy, let me fly, I will not be locked in a carriage." She waved her hand and walked away.
She looked around the camp, a small, dizzy laugh escaping her lips. Every head turned. The scouts, the knights, and most importantly, the Earl.
I sat motionless, my silver eyes fixed on her though I did not call or shift. I didn't move to help her either.
I waited for the ale to strip away the shame like it did before, leaving only the woman who had dared to hold my hand in the dark.
"She looks... vibrant tonight, doesn't she, Kaldric?" Zack murmured, confused at her sudden change, "What happened?"
"Who knows?"
I kept my eyes on my wife as she stumbled toward the heat of the fire, her spirit unburdened and she finally spotted me.
"Oh, there you are, My Lord~"
Before my mind could register, her small, soft arms wrapped around my neck, her chest pressing against my back firmly. She tucked her chin over my shoulder with a heartwarming grin.
"Done hiding from me?" she murmured, her voice like liquid honey, loud enough to carry through the silent camp.
"Why are you sitting here all alone, like a grumpy soul you are?"
I sat rigid, my heartbeats increasing. I had wanted a reaction, not the embarrassment, but the silkiness of her tone was a weapon I hadn't prepared for.
"Good Lord, You are such an amazing knight, you know?" she sighed, her breath warm against my ear. She moved one hand to trace the line of my jaw, her fingers grazing me affectionately.
"So strong. And your body... It's like iron, isn't it? I bet you could crush a man with one hand and hold me with the other." She giggled.
Across the fire, the King's eyebrows shot up. Emerson's smirk had vanished, replaced by a look of stunned, uncomfortable fascination.
"Lady Ardelle," the King said, his voice brimming with suppressed amusement.
"It seems the air has finally emboldened you. Do you truly find our Commander so... captivating? Or is it an attempt to entice?"
Ardelle turned her head toward the King, her eyes wide with a terrifying innocence that dried my throat as I prayed she wouldn't speak something I had to be held accountable for later.
"Oh, My Liege, I? Entice? My Lord entices 'me'."
The King's smirk widened, "How so?" His eyes turned to me to which I lowered my head, trying to sound harsh.
"Ardelle. Go–"
"No, Kaldric. Let me hear too. I would like to hear how my stone 'entices'. Go on, Lady Ardelle."
Because I did not plan that, I thought she would come, take my arm and take me away while confessing her desire for me.
She smiled sheepishly, "By existing,"