Deadpool was currently sitting on the floor of the announcer's booth, intensely drawing a giant circle with a red crayon while wearing a blonde braided wig and a red coat that was way too small for him. He was trying to smash two action figures together to see if they would fuse.
"tum, I've been trying to transmute a lifetime supply of chimichangas for the last twenty minutes, and all I got was a slightly burnt smell!" Deadpool shouted, throwing the crayon over his shoulder. "But forget my science project! We are heading down to Ring 19, and the ground itself is no longer safe! It's the battle of the 'Tap and Change' champions! The Fullmetal Alchemist versus the leader of the Shie Hassaikai! It's Alchemy against the Overhaul Quirk! Don't blink, or the floor might turn into a giant blender!"
Ring 19 was a massive, abandoned concrete metropolis. Concrete pillars, steel rebar, and empty streets stretched out under a gray sky. It was basically an endless supply of raw materials for both fighters.
Heimdall was broadcasting from inside a suspended steel vault. "Match Number Twenty-Nine! The State Alchemist, Edward Elric! Versus the Yakuza boss, Kai Chisaki, known as Overhaul!"
The Germaphobe and the Shorty
Overhaul stood in the middle of a cracked intersection, adjusting his plague mask with a gloved hand. He looked around the ruined city with absolute disgust. "This place is filthy. It's diseased. And you... you have metal grafted onto your body. It's a grotesque mockery of flesh. Let me cure you."
Edward cracked his knuckles, clapping his hands together with a sharp CLAP. "Cure me? Buddy, you look like a rejected bird mascot. And I don't need a cure from a guy who hides behind a mask."
Overhaul's eyes narrowed. "Insolent little brat."
Ed's eye started twitching wildly. His golden aura flared. "WHO ARE YOU CALLING A MICROSCOPIC PINT-SIZED BEAN THAT CAN'T EVEN BE SEEN WITHOUT A MAGNIFYING GLASS?!"
The War of the Ground
Edward lunged forward, slamming his hands onto the pavement. The concrete surged upward, forming three massive stone spears that shot directly at Overhaul.
Overhaul didn't move. He simply touched the ground with one finger. In a flash of red light, the stone spears—and the entire street beneath Ed's feet—deconstructed into thousands of harmless pebbles.
"Your alchemy is fundamentally flawed," Overhaul said coldly. He touched the pebbles, reassembling them instantly into a wave of razor-sharp concrete spikes tearing toward Edward.
Up in the booth, Deadpool was chewing on his crayon. "It's a terrifying match-up, tum! Ed has to obey the laws of equivalent exchange, but Overhaul just breaks things down and puts them back together however he wants! And if he touches Ed with all five fingers? POP! Human confetti!"
Edward used his automail leg to jump high, barely avoiding the spikes. Mid-air, he clapped again and touched the steel side of a ruined building. He pulled out a massive, perfectly crafted steel cannon and fired it blindly.
Overhaul calmly touched the incoming steel shell, breaking it down into iron dust before it even reached him. "Pointless."
The Metal Trap
Edward landed hard, panting slightly. He realized ranged attacks weren't going to work against a guy who could erase matter on contact. He had to get in close, but getting close meant risking instant death.
"Let's see how you handle this, bird-face!" Ed shouted.
He charged right at Overhaul. Chisaki held out his hand, ready to deconstruct the boy the second they made contact. As Ed threw a punch, Overhaul caught his right arm.
Red light flashed.
But Edward didn't explode. Overhaul's eyes widened in shock. The arm was completely made of automail steel. Overhaul's quirk worked on the metal, breaking down the outer plating, but before the destruction could travel up to Ed's actual flesh, Edward reacted.
Ed didn't pull away. He clapped his left hand onto his crumbling right automail arm, transmuting the remaining, jagged steel shards directly around Overhaul's wrist, locking the Yakuza boss's hand in a heavy, unbreakable iron vise.
"You rely too much on your hands!" Edward yelled.
With his opponent trapped and unable to use his quirk with that hand, Edward pivoted perfectly, driving his metal knee straight into Overhaul's jaw with the force of a freight train. Overhaul's plague mask shattered, and he hit the concrete, completely knocked out.
"Match Twenty-Nine winner... EDWARD ELRIC!" Heimdall announced, slowly lowering his steel vault.
Up in the booth, Deadpool cheered and threw his wig into the crowd. "The Fullmetal Alchemist takes the win with some heavy metal martial arts! That's 29 winners down, 22 matches to go in Round One, tum! We are blazing through this!"
The Brainiacs are Up Next!
We're moving from matter manipulation to pure, unadulterated brain power!
Match 30 (Ring 11): Rick Sanchez vs. Senku Ishigami. (Science vs. Drunk Science. The battle of the billion-IQ brains!)
Match 31 (Ring 13): Mikasa Ackerman vs. Spider-Gwen. (High-Speed Acrobatics!)
Match 32 (Ring 16): Spike Spiegel vs. Vash the Stampede. (Space Cowboy vs. Humanoid Typhoon. Gun-slinging goodness!)