Chapter 13: Talking Game of Thrones with
"The Imp"
Castle Black, Guest Room
"To be honest, Castle Black's home-brewed ale is as inferior as the whores of Mole's Town, but I don't care."
After downing a cup of bitter ale, Tyrion Lannister spoke these words to Samwell, who was warged by Jon.
"You know, Samwell? I once had a dream: to sleep with every whore in the world before I die."
Seeing that Jon didn't respond, Tyrion assumed he was a virgin, so he boastfully shared one of his dreams.
"From the look of you, I'm guessing you're still a virgin?"
"My father is quite strict. My brother and I rarely have the chance to drink except at banquets."
Jon, having gathered some information from Samwell, replied this way.
The mental exchange between the two was incredibly fast, akin to thought-sharing, and Jon could choose whether or not to let Samwell hear certain things.
It could be said that the little fatty had completely become Jon's tool. Unless Jon deactivated the warging mode or the duration expired, he would remain under Jon's influence.
"Then you really are pitiful. I've been doing this all the way from the Westerlands. If you get the chance, you must go to King's Landing to see for yourself."
As Tyrion said this, he went to the barrel to pour another cup of ale.
"But it's a pity. Since you're such a good fighter, it's unlikely you'll become a 'Wandering Crow.' Yoren, who often travels the King's Landing route, even went whoring with me!"
"Do you really intend to live your whole life in such a muddle?"
Jon was speechless at Tyrion's attitude toward life. Although this guy was a winner who survived until the end, the price he paid was far too great. His immediate family was nearly all dead, and he became a "kinslayer" loathed by everyone.
On the continent of Westeros, kinslaying and guest right violations are considered the "two unforgivable sins." From high-born nobles to commoners, no one has any goodwill toward those who commit such crimes.
Duke Brynden Rivers, "Bloodraven," once saved the entire Targaryen Dynasty, but because he killed his own bastard brother, Daemon Blackfyre, his entire tenure as Hand of the King was shrouded in conspiracy and curses.
Though Tyrion was one of the final winners, his end likely wouldn't be much better than Brynden Rivers', perhaps matching what some had speculated.
That the ultimate victor was actually the Night King who had warged into Bran Stark, and his final goal was to throw the Seven Kingdoms into total chaos to gather strength for the next rise of the great other.
"What's wrong? Could our 'Blood Tank' Samwell Tarly have actually received a revelation from the Warrior?"
Tyrion was a bit surprised by Jon's sudden change in tone. For some reason, he felt a faint unease, as if it were telling him that the person he was facing wasn't human.
"While I was unconscious, I did receive a divine revelation. But it wasn't the kind you imagine. It was a dream, or rather, a memory."
"Hehehe, that joke isn't funny at all. Did... did that foul-mouthed Alliser Thorne hit you in the head? If you need help, I'll go inform Maester Aemon."
Somehow, after seeing Jon's eyes, Tyrion's heart skipped a beat for no reason, as if something terrible was about to happen.
The reason Tyrion brought up "divine revelation" was entirely because the candle flames had suddenly flared up when Jon swore the Night's Watch oath in the Castle Black sept.
Many Night's Watch recruits believed it was the Seven responding to Samwell Tarly's prayers, a testament to his transformation from a coward to a brave man.
"Fine, if you're not interested, then forget it. I thought you'd be curious about dragons and your inheritance of Casterly Rock!"
Though he wasn't sure why the other was afraid, Jon shifted his approach and revealed a few fragments.
"Clatter... Thud..."
"W-what did you say?"
Upon hearing Jon's words, Tyrion's hand reflexively loosened, and the wooden ale cup in his hand fell to the floor.
"Drip..."
The poor-quality ale splashed high, soaking Tyrion's lower half. Although he looked as if he had wet his pants, Jon's words struck his mind like a thunderbolt.
"I... I... I... You're not joking, are you? No, joking with me wouldn't do any good. Tell me quickly..."
His interest fully piqued, Tyrion rushed right up to Jon. Despite the significant difference in their sizes, Tyrion's presence at that moment seemed no weaker than that of a full-grown man.
"I can tell you, but you must agree to one condition. And my time is running out; we must enter the Haunted Forest before this evening."
Out of Tyrion's sight, the timer below Jon's attribute panel was ticking away, and he wanted to complete another system quest before the time ran out.
"The Haunted Forest!? Seven Hells, that name sounds ominous. You're not planning to sacrifice me to the old gods, are you?"
Tyrion found Jon's request very strange, as the events of today made him feel like he was dreaming.
"So, do you want to hear it or not?"
Jon's question once again left the choice to Tyrion. After a moment's thought, the latter couldn't suppress his inner longing.
Tyrion let go of Jon's clothes and picked up the fallen cup from the ground.
After pouring another cup and taking a sip, Tyrion said fiercely:
"Speak, boy! While I've always believed there's magic in this world, I don't believe in 'divine revelations' one bit!"
But remembering the strange changes in the other, Tyrion felt conflicted. Though he wanted to know what his future held, he feared knowing some cruel outcome.
Thus, Tyrion was more conflicted than ever, even regretting coming to The Wall.
"Speak, boy!"
The joking Tyrion was gone, replaced by someone lost about the future.
In truth, he had always known what his future might hold, but his longing for family and trust in them had kept him hopeful.
"Finishing your piss on The Wall..."
... "Your sister and your brother..."
... "In the end, your good friend..."
... With his previous two experiences, Jon was getting better at storytelling. He retold the story of that poorly-ended TV show from Tyrion's perspective.
"Uh... well! Your story is truly shocking, but I have one question."
After hearing Jon's story, Tyrion was stunned for a long while. However, after sorting through the timeline, he had a different view.
"While using wildfire could solve everything at once, the other powerful nobles and the Faith wouldn't just stand by and watch my sister take the throne."
The well-read Tyrion pointed out the flaw in Cersei's ascension. Though that style of doing things was very much like his sister...
Tyrion knew that the male nobles of Westeros would never allow a woman on the iron throne.
The last woman to try was Rhaenyra Targaryen, which led to the Dance of the Dragons across the Seven Kingdoms. The mighty Targaryen Family declined from then on, their sky-conquering dragons dying one by one, until House Baratheon eventually usurped the throne.
"I'm just telling you what I saw. I never said it would definitely happen!"
"Uh... the matter with Cersei and Jaime is indeed troublesome. If Joffrey truly takes the iron throne, it will be a disaster for the entire Seven Kingdoms."
Hearing Jon's words, Tyrion felt an urge to beat him up. But with his mind in chaos, he didn't know what to do for a moment.
Tyrion truly regretted it. He loathed his own cursed curiosity. If he hadn't invited Jon for a drink, perhaps he could have continued his journey back to King's Landing in peace.
"My dear Lord Tyrion, what I want to tell you is that our deal isn't finished. So, what you should be considering now is how to persuade Lord Commander Jeor Mormont to let us out."
Looking at the dazed Tyrion, Jon couldn't help but remind him.
"Seven Hells! I really shouldn't have come here, let alone been interested in your words. Fine, I think I know what to do!"
Jon's words were like boiling water poured over him, making Tyrion hop around in agitation.
"As expected of the future Hand of the Queen. Have you thought of a way so quickly?"
"Can you stop using that title?"
Looking at Jon's half-smile, Tyrion wanted to rip his mouth open, but remembering he probably couldn't beat him, he could only say this helplessly.
"By the way, why are you so obsessed with going to that Haunted Forest? Or is it..."
"Because within the Haunted Forest lies a treasure left by a sage of old!"
Hearing Jon's words, Tyrion instantly perked up. He hurriedly said:
"Then what are we waiting for? Let's go at once!"
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