we talked about you—
on a lazy thursday
over coffee and bad jokes.
my friend said your name
like it was candy.
sweet.
effortless.
admiring you the way
everyone does
once they've met you.
"she's so fucking talented," he said.
"like, she makes writing look easy."
i nodded.
smiled.
agreed too quickly.
"do you wanna date her?" i asked.
tried to sound casual.
tried to pretend
my heart wasn't beating like a fucking warning bell.
he paused.
shrugged.
"i would.
but i think she was into you."
i froze.
but smiled.
because i'm a goddamn coward.
"really?"
"yeah," he said,
"i drove her home once.
she was quiet.
distant.
didn't even hold me.
like she was saving that part of her
for someone else."
i laughed.
but i wanted to scream.
because deep down,
i knew she was saving it
for me.
and i—
i fucking wasted it.