Chapter 6: Accidental Bathroom Intrusion
The setting sun slanted across the street corner, bathing the entrance of the Rayne Clinic in a warm, orange glow.
Ethan locked the door and took a deep breath—the air was crisp, carrying a faint mix of ocean breeze and the unmistakable smell of weed.
He wrinkled his nose. "Is that... yeah, that's definitely marijuana. Ah, California."
He wasn't working late today, but he still felt weighed down by something.
John Kramer's haunting presence still lingered in his mind.
"Get well soon and please don't come back," he muttered, heading toward the corner.
The city's twilight was too beautiful, making him almost forget the darkness of his day. He decided to skip the cab and walk home.
Jazz music drifted from a roadside coffee shop, the breeze rustled old movie posters on a brick wall, and streetlights flickered on one by one.
Ethan bought a can of cold Budweiser, took a long sip, and let the coolness flow down his throat, tamping down his frayed nerves.
"That's enough, Ethan," he told himself. "Tonight, I just want to be a normal person."
He picked up his pace, crossing at the pedestrian signal.
A few minutes later, the door to the fourth-floor apartment swung open, and Ethan walked in to find Howard already there. Now, among the four guys from The Big Bang Theory, only Raj—the Indian guy—was missing.
The room was buzzing with activity—Howard was crouched in front of the TV fiddling with a VCR, Sheldon was scribbling frantically on his whiteboard, and Leonard was in the kitchen preparing popcorn and snacks.
"Hey, Ethan, you're back!" Leonard called out. "How was the clinic today?"
"Pretty good." Ethan shrugged off his jacket and rolled his shoulders. "Just had a... particularly intense patient. Old guy."
He loosened his tie and sighed, the old man's face and the word "Jigsaw" still spinning in his head.
Not particularly interested in whatever the science nerds were up to, Ethan headed straight for his bedroom.
He stripped off his clothes piece by piece, leaving only his undershirt and boxers. He stretched, planning to take a hot shower and cleanse his mind, body, and soul.
Walking into the bathroom, he noticed the shower curtain was drawn and heard the sound of running water.
Must be Raj.
"Raj, why are you showering at our place?"
Ethan pushed open the bathroom door and yanked back the shower curtain—then froze completely.
It wasn't Raj in the shower, but a blonde woman washing her hair.
The moment she looked up, water droplets slid down her neck—
"AHHH—!!!"
"Whoa?!"
"SORRY!" Ethan reacted with lightning speed, yanking the curtain shut and spinning around. "I thought you were Raj!"
Footsteps thundered from outside. Leonard was first through the door, followed immediately by Sheldon and Howard.
"What happened?!"
"Who screamed?!"
The three burst in to find Ethan standing by the door in nothing but his half-unbuttoned shirt and boxers, hair disheveled, while behind the shower curtain a woman clutched desperately at a towel.
"I—I thought it was Raj!" Ethan stammered.
"Raj?" Leonard blinked. "He's not even here yet."
"Then I clearly... made a mistake!"
"A mistake?" Howard muttered under his breath. "I wish I could make that kind of mistake."
Sheldon frowned. "I've always maintained that unfamiliar females shouldn't be permitted bathroom access. This violates Section 12 of the Apartment Sanitation Protocol."
"I'm not unfamiliar!" Penny's voice rang out from behind the curtain. "I said hi to all of you this afternoon!"
"This is just a misunderstanding, everyone stay calm." Leonard tried to mediate while sneaking a peek through the gap in the curtain. "Penny's bathroom isn't working yet..."
"I am calm." Ethan held up his hands. "And I just got off work, so I was spaced out. I didn't see anything."
"Gentlemen, I'm still showering here!" Penny poked her head around the curtain. "Get out! All of you, OUT!"
The four exchanged glances, then scrambled out of the bathroom.
"And close the damn door!"
Fifteen minutes later, the apartment had returned to normal.
The living room TV hummed to life.
"This is Stephen Hawking's 1974 lecture at MIT, before he got the voice synthesizer," Howard said in a robotic monotone, inserting the VHS tape.
Sheldon leaned forward. "Silence! We are about to witness the echoes of a brilliant mind."
Ethan sat on the couch, watching them reverently guard an ancient VCR. The shock from earlier was somewhat diluted by their scientific devotion.
Just then, the bathroom door opened.
Penny emerged, her hair still damp, her cheeks flushed from the hot water.
Leonard immediately jumped to his feet, nervous as a freshman at prom. "H-hi, Penny! How was the, uh, the bathroom?"
"It was great, except for the part where four guys suddenly barged in. That was less great."
Ethan cleared his throat. "Penny, I sincerely apologize. I went straight to my room after work and had no idea it was you. And I swear I didn't see anything."
"That's a shame. I've got a pretty good body." She raised an eyebrow with a playful smirk.
Howard immediately sidled closer. "Hey, Penny, I'm Howard Wolowitz, MIT Engineering, Caltech Applied Physics. You might already be familiar with some of my work—it's currently orbiting Europa taking high-resolution digital photographs."
Penny nodded vaguely. "I'm Penny. I work at The Cheesecake Factory."
The air crystallized in awkward silence for three full seconds as Howard's attempted flirtation crashed and burned.
"I'm gonna go change." She beat a hasty retreat.
When Penny came back out fully dressed, Raj had arrived and was huddled in the corner clutching a beer, his eyes darting between Penny and the carpet. He wanted to say hello but couldn't produce a sound, managing only an awkward "selective mutism smile."
The apartment's atmosphere returned to its peculiar equilibrium.
Hawking's synthesized voice droned from the TV, mechanical and solemn. Sheldon and Leonard sat at attention like students in lecture hall. Howard gripped the remote.
Ethan sprawled on the opposite end of the couch, his posture completely relaxed—like a construction worker collapsing after a twelve-hour shift. An empty beer can sat by his feet, his expression somewhere between exhausted and contemplative.
He glanced at Hawking's image on the screen. "What's supposed to be so fascinating about this?"
Penny walked over. Her hair had dried, and she'd changed into a loose vintage band T-shirt and faded jeans. Her casual, natural presence seemed to brighten the entire living room.
"Sorry," she said with a smile as she sat down beside Ethan. "I think I interrupted your science party."
"Not at all," Leonard responded immediately, his voice jumping up an octave. "We were just getting to the good part!"
"The section about 'black holes not completely destroying information,'" Sheldon elaborated.
Penny nodded thoughtfully, then said with complete sincerity, "Sounds... sexy."
Howard nearly did a spit-take with his drink.
Ethan couldn't help but laugh. "That's the first time I've ever heard someone use that word to describe Hawking."
Author's Note ✍️
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