Othala. Capital of Asgard.
"Okay, I'm asking for the Stargate because it's a ready-made technology, and any engineering work the Asgard does to me is like an Italian strike. Take my Staff of Light, for example. No, I'm completely satisfied with it, but the Asgard who made it simply fulfilled my request without offering any improvements beyond my requests. That's what an Italian strike is. True, you're better than the Italians: those workers wouldn't care if the result of their labor exploded and killed someone. After all, they follow their superiors' orders to the letter, turning from people with imagination and a vested interest in the end product into mere automatons.
I, on the other hand, divide my time between scientist, warrior, and manager. The Asgard assigned to me as scientists won't be interested in the result. In the end, I'll have high-tech crap, but it won't be effective." "I've explained the principles of the Italian strike to the Asgard for the umpteenth time, and how I need the finished technology with a breakdown of all the technological processes, and nothing more. Oh yeah, they led me to Othala. Brunnhilde did it, and for a couple of hours now I've been arguing with some Asgardian official, definitely not from the High Council—they have their own business—and this gray bureaucrat is sucking my blood, telling me that handing over Stargate technology to the Goa'uld isn't a fun scenario either. Maybe I should have taken Isara? Let her fuck with that gray vampire's brains."
"Our scientists are highly qualified and are capable of creating amazing things using Goa'uld technology," the Asgardian persisted.
"Goa'uld technology is a flexible concept. I've already mastered carbon nanotubes quite comfortably, which isn't the technology of most Goa'uld. So, how do I calculate it? Let's say we need an orbital shipyard capable of building six Huttaks simultaneously. My understanding is that it would be an orbital station with a central module housing the factories, the core of the transport system, the control room that controls it all, along with a reactor capable of powering all the systems. Six beams would radiate from the central module, the ones that lead to specific shipyards where the modules would be assembled. My goal is to increase the efficiency of ship production, but I'm not sure that's your goal either. That's why I suspect Asgardian scientists will become dumb automatons who won't invent a tractor beam crane until I tell them to. And until then, they'll pray that some stupid Goa'uld doesn't come up with something revolutionary."
– The Asgardians do not pray to the gods.
"If we keep arguing, I'll need a bed somewhere on Othala. Eventually, the Asgard will start praying to the gods for that vile Goa'uld to finally get off their planet," I retort reasonably.
"They'd rather send a petition to the Supreme Council," Gna persisted, the pettifogger. And yes, it was a woman. A long time ago, but she'd been developing the skill of scooping out brains with a small dessert spoon for tens of thousands of years.
"Here's a trivial example. I have a group of scientists working on this idea: a shielded ship or station should dive into a star and collect energy in naquadah batteries, then use these naquadah batteries for industrial use. They have free rein to invent whatever they want within the framework of this goal. An Asgardian, however, will constantly wonder if they're giving the Goa'uld some key to future conquests, especially one with such an unconventional mind. A trivial example: I'm currently working on the design of multiple manipulators that could be assembled from prefabricated parts into a glider, a teltak, or an alkesh.
The latter is the most difficult. In theory, I could produce an alkesh in a few days, given the prefabricated modules, which would greatly enhance my military command. So, let's say I task one of your scientists with creating a manipulator according to the specifications, but they discover that due to imperfect energy programming, the manipulator will malfunction or even burn out. I don't think he'll tell me anything, since he was assigned to work on the manipulator, not the power system. That's what an Italian strike is—do as you're told and turn off your brain. I'd rather wait for the 30,000 scientists that Egeria spawned. It's safer that way. And there are only nine years left to wait.
"But they will have to rely on scientific intuition, when the Asgard already has ready-made solutions in many areas.
"That's also true," I agree with the bureaucrat. "But isn't scientific activity a good thing that advances civilization? And ready-made solutions become worthless."
– If you think so, then you yourself can unravel the secret of the Stargate.
"In a thousand years," I retort. "Just like you can't transport yourself to another reality to ask other Asgardians for help. You need a quantum mirror, and I need a Stargate."
"If you don't need Asgard scientists, then perhaps ship production will satisfy your needs," Gna suggested.
"Thanks, but no longer necessary," I tell her. "But at what rate will we determine the value of my find and your offer? At least my solution makes sense—one portal for another."
"A portal for portal technology," the Asgardian pointed out. "They're different things."
"A portal to another universe in exchange for technology for traveling through ours," I answered.
– Perhaps we have some artifacts of equal value?
"What could be as valuable as a portal to other universes?" I ask, reasonably. "Perhaps technology to create solar protection for one of my planets? But then again, I can do that. There would be energy losses, of course, but I don't have those problems. Or a teleportation system..."
- No!
"Then make your offers. I've already agreed to a personal ribbon device capable of opening gates to other galaxies—it was worth a try."
- No.
- And why is that? - I was genuinely curious.
"This technology is Asgardian, not a modified Goa'uld like your staff, and has a hidden potential for abuse, unlike, say, hologram technology. We fear you could transfer vast forces to another galaxy and establish a Goa'uld regime there."
"Indeed, such a threat could indeed exist. But I'm telling you, in nine years I'll have 75,000 Goa'uld, 30,000 of whom will be scientists. Even the most powerful System Lords don't have such resources. So it's entirely possible that my domain's entry into a technological singularity, which is now a threat to the future world order, will become a prop for my table in nine years. Give me the gate already."
"Such a transfer requires a comprehensive analysis," the Asgardian pointed out.
"Yes, I'll make a weapon out of it. I can make it out of any galactic gateway by placing it at the bottom of the alkesh. Once connected through the gateway, I'll fire a 600-gigawatt laser through it. What's there to discuss? I'm pretty good at weapon design."
Gna looks at me with that signature Asgardian stare that means, "Are you stupid?" I didn't even ask for cloning for the simple reason that a Goa'uld's consciousness is imprinted within its genetic makeup, so if I had cloning technology, I could create something like the "Baal Delirium" with the clones, and the Asgard definitely can't allow that. Another upgrade to shields and hyperdrives might make the Asgard wonder: what are they even growing? My ships already travel at 7.2 light-years per hour, and this would make it 14.4. Isn't that dangerous? I already have the technology to produce various sugars and proteins; thank you, it's delicious. Ultimately, we're actively balancing the fine lines between what's proportionate and safe. I insist that the sweetest and safest gift I could receive is the Stargate; the Asgard refuse to accept that.
"Are you sure you don't have a planet-wide shield?" I asked. "That would be a reasonable compromise. The science behind it would be magic to me. It would be very difficult to replicate, and ultimately, it could be classified as an artifact on top of an artifact."
– A shield for the entire planet would require a huge consumption of energy and, of course, could not be turned on constantly.
"Neutronium reactors with a supply of this neutronium?" I asked.
"You, Lord Szarekh, need it in emergency situations, so the amount of neutronium will be limited, but at the same time you have colossal energy independence.
"As if there's ever a shortage of energy? And a weather monitoring device for change. You've already fleeced me worse than the Odessites at Odesa Privoz. I know the Israeli Prime Minister, and even there I haven't been fleeced like that. You're better at this than the Jews."
"Is that a compliment?" Gna asked.
"It depends on the situation. When the technology is ready, simply unload it on a planet outside of Khasar Station's sensor range, then I'll fly in with the fleet and pick it up. Although, once I pick it up, you can set everything up using the holograms."
"Okay, the deal is made," said the Asgardian.
- In which I was cheated.