Chapter 19 -----------------------------------------------------------------
Translator: uly
Chapter: 19
Chapter Title: Feeling Defeated
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Clang!
The moment sword met spear, Anna's eyes widened.
'Again.'
The same feeling she'd experienced time and again during their exchanges. The first couple of times, she'd chalked it up to coincidence.
But after it kept happening, Anna had no choice but to accept the truth.
'He's reading everything.'
Isaac was predicting the trajectory of her spear, matching the speed of her swings almost perfectly.
The spear techniques she'd honed over years of training to serve her young lady had been seen through in just a few clashes.
At first, it sparked her competitive spirit and a touch of annoyance, but at some point, it turned into awe.
"Hah!"
But on the contrary...
"...!"
Isaac had already anticipated the trajectory and moved to parry, but the faint ripple at the tip of Anna's spear pushed him back, sending him tumbling to the ground.
Not missing a beat, Anna spun once, twirling her spear cleanly and pressing the blade against Isaac's throat.
"I win."
Isaac raised his hands in surrender, and Anna slowly withdrew her spear.
"...Can you really call this a win for me?"
Even though she'd come out on top, she asked timidly.
In truth, Anna felt like she'd lost.
"You read my spear completely. At some point, your sword was faster than my judgment."
"... "
"It was just my basic strength and stamina holding me back. That's the only reason."
"... "
"If you trained for a month, you'd beat someone like me easily."
Being overtaken by a latecomer was immense pressure.
Honestly, Anna was starting to doubt herself.
Even though she'd gone from an ordinary maid to a soldier through spear training.
She'd had some confidence, too.
"You're not asking the guy you just beat for comfort, are you?"
Isaac grinned sheepishly.
He was already flipping open his notebook.
Not a textbook, but a "Sparring Log" where he reviewed his matches, noting shortcomings and such.
Seeing that, Anna asked awkwardly,
"You really are amazing, Sir Isaac."
"What is?"
Isaac was jotting down the reason for defeat as a poor response to the final clash.
He even sketched Anna's stance in that last strike and his own counter simply.
"Even when you lose, you seem confident. Like you know you'll win in the end."
"No way that's true."
Anna was slightly flustered by his rare firm denial.
"The reason I don't fear defeat is because I'm grateful even for the chance to lose."
His eyes stayed on the log as he continued.
"I know how agonizing it is to not even get that opportunity. So losing doesn't matter."
"... "
"I don't have time to dwell on defeat. I want to keep swinging my sword."
Looking at Isaac's faint smile, Anna felt her heart skip a beat for a moment.
"Did you charm Lady Rianna like this?"
"Out of nowhere?"
Isaac looked embarrassed.
Under Anna's insistent gaze demanding an answer, he scratched his cheek and replied,
"I wasn't this subtle when I wooed her. I was more direct."
"Wow."
With the topic shifting to romance anyway, Anna brought up Silberna, who was still watching from the corner.
"What do you think of the young lady?"
"Silberna? She's a good friend. She's helped me solidify the direction of my swordsmanship a lot."
"That's it? Really?"
"Why?"
"Sigh, Sir Isaac. As someone who's been with the young lady since we were kids, let me be frank."
Anna crouched down in front of the squatting Isaac.
In the corner of the wide training ground, the two whispered face-to-face.
"To the young lady, people are in just two categories: enemies or comrades."
"Harsh classification."
"Anyway, just those two."
Anna held up her index and middle fingers.
"But lately, the young lady's been acting strange."
Then her ring finger slyly rose.
"It feels like a third category is emerging. And that's you, Sir Isaac."
"... "
"You're a married man, so you get it, right? I don't need to spell out my lady's embarrassment any further?"
Anna glared sharply.
Isaac nodded awkwardly.
"I get the gist."
"The gist?"
"Got it. I understand. I know what you mean. Helmunt and Caldias. Keep a proper distance, right?"
Anna burst into a grin at Isaac's roundabout phrasing.
"As expected of you, Sir Isaac. They say handsome men read women well, and you nailed it."
"... "
"Be honest. This has happened a lot, hasn't it? You said you worked as a ferryman. Famous as the handsome boatman, right?"
"You don't need to know."
Isaac had run a tiny ferry boat.
It was true women customers flocked because of his striking looks.
"Anyway, you're married, Sir Isaac. I trust you'll keep clear boundaries?"
"Got it."
At that moment.
The sky darkened.
The two, still crouched, peeked up to find Silberna looking down at them, arms crossed.
Did she hear?
The question flashed through both their minds simultaneously.
But,
"Anna, you're on duty."
She apparently hadn't caught the conversation, delivering the news flatly.
"Pardon? Duty? I have two hours left."
"Bolten's sick today and had to take off. He looked pretty rough. So you're filling in as the next on shift."
"... "
Anna clamped her mouth shut and looked up at Silberna.
The big guy who scarfed two bowls at lunch was sick?
'She was talking to Bolten.'
She'd wondered what they were chatting about while holding up the others heading to duty.
Anna sighed and stood.
"Can't be helped. I'll head out then."
She bowed and left.
Behind her back came Silberna's faintly lowered voice.
"What now? Anna's gone, and she was helping."
"Mm, yeah."
"If you really need it, I could, uh, help? I have time. Lots of it."
"...Sure."
Isaac pondered briefly and accepted Silberna's help.
"Great! Let's go right now!"
Silberna snatched up a spear, her voice instantly bright and bubbly.
Anna, trudging away, slapped her forehead and let her shoulders slump.
'Idiot young lady.'
Saying he's just a friend like that.
Having gripped only spears and fought only beasts in the north, Anna fully realized her young lady sorely lacked romantic skills.
She hadn't realized her own feelings yet, but it was probably just a matter of time.
'Still, Sir Isaac will handle it well.'
Being married, he'd keep proper boundaries.
He'd fend her off if she crossed the line.
It'd be a beautiful but cold memory, like an ice crystal.
What could be done?
'He already belongs to someone.'
If only he weren't married.
Anna regretted it a bit, thinking she'd have supported Silberna wholeheartedly then.
She headed to the wall for her forced duty shift.
[The reason I don't fear defeat is because I'm grateful even for the chance to lose.]
[I don't have time to dwell on defeat. I want to keep swinging my sword.]
On the way, Isaac's words from moments ago suddenly resurfaced.
'No time to be bound by defeat.'
Textbook-perfect advice, but seeing someone live it made it hit different.
Feeling her motivation surging in various ways, Anna gripped her spear tighter and quickened her pace.
◇◇◇◆◇◇◇ The Helmunt estate was unusually lively.
And the reason was one person.
"Sniff!"
In Rianna's room.
Alois, tears streaming, felt like his chest was ripping apart in agony.
Ten whole days.
He hadn't seen Rianna for ten days.
It was exactly like the day Sharen left for the Mallidan Wall.
Naturally, Rianna would face severe punishment for defying the family head's orders.
Arandel showed no mercy, even to his daughter, if she disobeyed him.
That fear was why.
Alois had forcibly suppressed his urge to follow and stayed here, missing Rianna.
"Sis!"
Lying on Rianna's bed, face buried in her pillow, Alois soaked it with his tears.
◇◇◇◆◇◇◇ The well-maintained carriage road.
The long line of Helmunt carriages halted before the Mallidan Wall.
They were later than other nobles, but for a simple reason.
"Gotta show some pride."
Arriving early would feel like waiting on the others.
And rushing over just because Caldias called? No thanks.
"Sigh, all this hassle because of that Isaac guy."
Sharen grumbled, popping a snack into her mouth.
She didn't actually seem too upset.
Isaac was just an excuse; the tomboy was thrilled like it was an adventure.
The carriage stopped for inspection.
Kelsi, Sharen's maid, slipped out quietly.
The baggage wagons arrived, and she lightly bowed to the Helmunt knights already outside.
Inside, Kelsi called softly,
"Lady Rianna?"
A white cloth rustled, and Rianna poked her head out from hiding beneath it.
"We've arrived. Mallidan Wall. With all the carriages, inspections will take about two hours."
"...Right."
Rianna nodded and pulled out pre-prepared clothes from under the cloth.
A maid uniform, no less.
Only Sharen Helmunt was scheduled to come; if word got out Rianna was here too, Caldias might make an issue of it.
Rianna planned to hide her identity as much as possible.
Kelsi couldn't hide her worry upon seeing it.
"I don't know why you've come all this way, but there must be a good reason."
"... "
"I'll do everything I can to help."
Kelsi handed over a hairnet and mask.
While waiting outside briefly, Rianna emerged in the maid outfit.
Her hair was fully pinned up in the net, exposing her forehead—embarrassing, but...
A headband covered it further, hiding as much red hair as possible, and the mask concealed her face.
"This should be enough."
Kelsi grinned and gave a thumbs-up.
Rianna nodded in satisfaction and slowly looked up at the Mallidan Wall.
A striking woman was boldly gazing down at the Helmunt carriages and knights from atop it.
'Silberna Caldias.'
Rianna remembered her.
A spear master with exceptional skill beyond her years.
A woman more than capable of shouldering Caldias's future.
She recalled sparring once.
'She's gotten stronger.'
She could tell just by looking.
Silberna was stronger than when they'd fought.
'It was a good spar. Not just about winning or losing, but learning from each other—'
Then.
A black-haired man appeared behind Silberna.
Rianna's eyes widened.
Relief washed over her seeing Isaac safe on the front lines, but...
Silberna and Isaac smiled at each other, chatting about something.
The moment she saw them casually sharing snacks Isaac had brought.
'...'
Her fist clenched unwittingly.
Rianna tilted her head puzzled and muttered,
"I clearly won that spar."
Why?
Did she feel like she'd lost?
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