Chapter 172: Online Dreaming! Part 1!
Because he had only gone to see a single movie, he had already run into Ibuki and Horikita. Hachiman felt that if they kept wandering around, they would likely encounter even more people. It wasn't that he was being paranoid; it was simply that the school was only so large, the number of people out during the holidays was high, and his face had become quite conspicuous.
Especially since Karuizawa was also cute.
Walking together, even under the pretense of being Student Council members working together, if they continued, there was no telling who might pop out from the next corner.
"Let's call it a day here," he said, coming to a halt.
Karuizawa glanced at him. Although she found the sudden stop a bit unexpected, she nonetheless nodded. "Okay."
This was because, just as she had mentioned Horikita earlier, she was also worried that encountering Matsushita would be very troublesome.
And so, the two began walking back the way they came. The sunlight was softer than before, casting long shadows across the walkway. Karuizawa walked beside him, her pace slightly slower than on the way there, her backpack strap swaying gently on her shoulder with every step. However, when they were less than 400 meters from the dorms, both of them stopped.
Hachiman looked at the path leading to the dorms and suddenly remembered something.
"By the way," he turned his head, "Shouldn't we change how we address each other?"
Karuizawa blinked. "Change how we address each other?"
"Yeah," Hachiman said earnestly. "Since we're dating, we can't keep calling each other 'Hikigaya' and 'Karuizawa' forever."
Karuizawa looked at his deadpan, serious face, and the corner of her mouth twitched slightly. "Then what do you want to call me?"
Hachiman thought about it. He had actually considered this question. Calling her by her full name was too formal; calling her "classmate" was too distant. Calling her "Kei"—he ran the word through his mind and decided there was nothing wrong with it.
"Kei," he said.
Karuizawa's fingers pinched the strap of her bag. She was long used to hearing her name from others. Everyone in the "gyaru" group called her that. Even Matsushita had switched from Karuizawa to Kei. So, she was actually accustomed to the name.
But hearing those two syllables come from Hachiman's mouth felt different. It wasn't uncomfortable; rather, it was too comfortable—so comfortable that the tips of her ears began to burn.
She lowered her eyes, staring at the tips of her shoes for two seconds, then looked back up. "Then what about you? How do you want me to call you?"
Hachiman's eyebrow twitched slightly. How did he want to be called?
Back at Sobu High, Yuigahama called him "Hikki." Though Yukinoshita would use his name, more often than not she didn't use it at all, rotating through various nicknames instead. His classmates frequently got his surname wrong—"Hikigaya," "Hiki-penguin," "Hachiman-kun"—there were all sorts of versions. Since coming to this school, he had heard "Hikigaya-kun" or "Hikigaya-san" so much that he thought he was used to it.
But now that Karuizawa asked, he realized he actually did want to be called by his given name. Just like during the island exam, he truly wished someone would address him by his name.
Thus, he looked up and met Karuizawa's slightly nervous eyes.
"Hachiman," he said, his tone as serious as before.
Karuizawa looked at those half-lidded eyes and suddenly found it a bit funny. This man had the exact same expression while saying this as he did when formulating exam strategies, as if "being called by his name" was an important matter that required serious handling.
She opened her mouth, gathering her courage, and was just about to speak—
"Hikigaya-kun."
At that moment, however, a voice cut in from the side. Both of them turned their heads simultaneously.
They found Kanzaki Ryuji walking over from the other side of the intersection, carrying a paper bag from the shopping district, looking as though he had just finished shopping. Seeing Hachiman, he instinctively gave a greeting, then his gaze moved to Karuizawa beside him, then back to Hachiman's face.
Though his personality was somewhat introverted, he wasn't a blockhead. He almost instantly sensed that the atmosphere between Hikigaya-kun and Class D's Karuizawa was a bit subtle. Consequently, Kanzaki's eyes immediately took on a delicate look that said, "Maybe I shouldn't be here."
"Kanzaki," Hachiman nodded, his expression no different from usual.
"Oh." Kanzaki glanced at him, then at Karuizawa, and very tactfully took half a step back.
"I'll be going first. You guys carry on." After saying that, Kanzaki walked quickly toward the dorms, his pace much faster than before, without even looking back.
Karuizawa watched Kanzaki's back disappear around the corner and let out a soft sigh. "A classmate from your class?"
"Yeah. Kanzaki Ryuji," Hachiman withdrew his gaze. "If I weren't here, he would likely be the class vice-representative."
"Oh," Karuizawa responded, saying nothing more.
However, she lowered her head and stared at her shoes. The courage she had managed to muster was mostly scattered by Kanzaki's interruption. To call him by his name in public might just be a "change of address" to Hachiman, but to her, it felt like crossing an invisible line.
Hachiman looked at her and didn't rush her. He could roughly understand the feeling—just as his throat had caught a bit when he said the name "Kei." It wasn't because he didn't like it, but because he wasn't used to it. When you're used to using surnames and maintaining distance, it takes time to switch. Of course, it could also mean something else—treating the other person as someone special. It was a grave matter.
'I did it so quickly, yet Karuizawa stalled?'
"Let's head back for now, then," he said. After all, Hikigaya Hachiman was actually quite perceptive of the atmosphere and a considerate person.
Karuizawa nodded.
The two split up at the intersection. After walking a few paces, Hachiman suddenly stopped and looked back. Karuizawa had already walked a distance away, her blonde ponytail swaying gently on her shoulder; she didn't look back. He watched for a second, then turned and continued walking.
.
.
.
Upon returning to his room, Hachiman placed his bag on the chair and sat on the edge of the bed. He pulled out his phone; the screen showed his chat with Karuizawa, still stuck on those few messages from yesterday. He stared at the blank input box for a few seconds and was about to lock the screen when it suddenly lit up.
A new message.
[Hachiman]
Just two words. No context, no follow-up, just sitting there quietly in the chat box. Hachiman stared at those two characters for several seconds, suddenly feeling that they carried more weight than any long-winded speech. He didn't hear them from someone's mouth; they were typed on a screen, but—this counted as the first time she had called him by his name.
However, before he could reply, another message popped up. This time it was a voice message, very short, only about a second long. He tapped it and held the phone to his ear.
"Hachiman—"
Karuizawa's voice came through the receiver, lower than her usual speaking tone, the end trailing off slightly as if it had been cut off before she finished. It wasn't the tone used for shouting to someone in a crowd, nor the tone for answering a question in class; it was a more private intonation used only for a specific person.
Hachiman put his phone down and leaned against the headboard. Since it was still afternoon, the sunlight outside squeezed through the gaps in the curtains, casting a thin white line across the ceiling. He stared at that line for a few seconds, his heart beating slightly faster than usual.
To his surprise, it wasn't shame. It was—not bad.
He picked up his phone, his finger pausing over the input box, and typed a line.
[I heard it. Kei.]
After sending it, he placed his phone next to his pillow and rested his head on his hands. The chat box on the screen remained lit, the two messages sitting one above the other, sent less than half a minute apart. Above was the voice clip, below were the two characters of her name. He looked at those messages, the corner of his mouth twitching slightly.
The sunlight outside was just right, and the room was quiet. The phone didn't vibrate again, and the screen slowly dimmed. But that dialogue remained lit in his mind—Hachiman, Kei. Two names, back and forth, as if something had finally clicked into place.
He pulled the blanket over his shoulders and closed his eyes. The sky outside was still bright, but he felt he could go to sleep early today.
-
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And so, a few more days of the holiday passed. Considering the situation with Matsushita on Karuizawa's end, Hachiman and Karuizawa did not go public, nor did they continue their dates. Karuizawa said that if they went public, it might end her friendships. He didn't quite understand why female friendships were so fragile, but he chose to respect her judgment.
So, during these few days, he did nothing. He didn't ask her out, though they did send "Good morning" and "Good night" texts to each other. Although it was just "Good morning" and "Good night," having someone message you every day and someone waiting for your message was a novel feeling for Hachiman.
But this couldn't go on forever.
Hachiman picked up his phone again, unlocked it, and opened his contacts. His finger hovered over Kushida's name for two seconds, then he tapped it. He figured that since Kushida likely knew he had chosen Karuizawa to date for the sake of "learning experience," and since she hadn't made a scene, she wasn't angry. Thus, he could ask her some questions.
[Kushida-san, I have something to ask you.]
After sending the message, he waited a while. The reply wasn't fast, but it wasn't slow either—about 30 seconds.
[What is it?]
Hachiman stared at those three words, feeling that his opening was a bit too stiff. But since he wasn't one to beat around the bush, he just typed it out directly.
[How do you get along with girls?]
The other side went silent. The screen kept showing "Typing...", flashing a few times, stopping, flashing again, then stopping. Hachiman waited patiently. After about a minute, the reply popped up.
[...Are you serious?]
[Yes. I really don't understand it well.]
This time, "Typing..." flashed for even longer. Hachiman could almost imagine Kushida on the other side, staring at the screen with her finger hovering over the keyboard, repeatedly debating what to say.
[Aren't you guys dating? You shouldn't be asking me about this.]
Hachiman looked at the line, thought for a bit, and typed another.
[It's because we're dating that I realized I don't understand anything. That's why I'm asking you.]
"Typing..." flashed again.
[What specifically do you want to ask?]
Hachiman breathed a sigh of relief. He thought for a moment and typed out the questions that had been bottled up in his heart over the last few days.
[For dates, are there any recommended choices? We saw a movie last time, and she said it was fine, but I felt she didn't like it that much.]
[Also, how do I know if she's truly happy? When she speaks, I can't tell if she's being polite or if she's genuinely glad.]
[As you know, she actually looks out for my feelings. But I feel her attitude toward me isn't that intimate. Usually, I'm the one who initiates contact.]
After the messages were sent, the other side remained silent for a long time. Hachiman stared at the screen, thinking he had asked too much. He was about to type "Never mind" to smooth things over when a message suddenly popped up.
[Hikigaya-kun, do you know what I'm feeling right now?]
Hachiman blinked and typed a question mark.
[At first, you came to me and said you'd pay 20 million points for me to teach you. I refused. Then you found Karuizawa. Now that you're dating, you come to ask me how to be in a relationship.]
[What kind of mood do you think I should be in?]
Hachiman stared at those lines, his finger hovering over the screen. He truly hadn't considered this. In his cognition, Kushida was "someone skilled in social interaction," a "consultable object," and "someone who could help him solve problems." As for whether she herself was willing to be used this way, he seemed to have never seriously considered it.
He typed a line, then deleted it. Typed another, deleted it. Finally, he sent a sentence.
[Sorry. I shouldn't have asked you these things.]
The reply came quickly this time.
[Forget it. It's not like you did it on purpose anyway. I know you don't understand these things.]
Hachiman looked at the line, unsure of what to reply. Kushida was right; he really didn't understand. If he couldn't even realize that asking these questions would make the other person uncomfortable, how could he possibly understand how to get along with girls?
But immediately after, the next message popped up.
[While she does seem to rely on you, if she were angry, she would express it directly. So, she probably isn't forcing herself. You've just started dating; she's also feeling things out. If you don't initiate contact, she doesn't dare to initiate contact either, fearing you'll think she's too clingy.]
Hachiman stared at this line for several seconds.
[Really?]
[Why would I lie to you? Do you think everyone is like you, blurting out whatever they think? Girls think much more than you guys do. Her not contacting you isn't because she doesn't want to; she's waiting.]
[Waiting for what?]
[Waiting for you to take the initiative.]
Hachiman ran those words through his mind. He really didn't seem to understand.
[And dates? Any recommendations?]
The reply came faster than before.
[The library. Or the seaside. You don't need to go to those "dating holy lands" every time. Just find a quiet place to stay and talk. The important thing is being together, not where you go.]
Hachiman looked at the line and suddenly felt that Kushida was indeed impressive. Things he hadn't been able to figure out for days, she clarified in a few sentences.
[Thanks. You really are skilled at this.]
The other side went silent again. This time the silence lasted longer than any before. Hachiman thought she wouldn't reply again and was about to put his phone down when the screen lit up.
[...Do you know why I'm skilled at this?]
Hachiman looked at the line and didn't reply immediately.
[Because too many people come to me for advice. People from our class, other classes, even senpais. When they have relationship problems, they all come to me. That's why I know everything.]
[But I myself have never been in a relationship once.]
Hachiman stared at the screen, suddenly at a loss for words.
[So now you know why I refused you back then, right? It wasn't because I don't like points, nor because you're not good. It's because I didn't want to use "teaching someone how to date" to prove that I "understand love."]
[And the result? You found Karuizawa, then came back to ask me. I'm still teaching you. We went in a circle, and nothing changed.]
Hachiman read those lines twice. He remembered the scenes on the ship, occasionally seeing Kushida leaning alone against the deck railing, her orange blouse swaying gently in the sea breeze.
He remembered that while she wanted to gain everyone's favor and always wore a smile to listen to everyone's troubles—making everyone feel she was kind, considerate, and understanding—everyone came to vent to her, and everyone thought she was their best friend. But no one had ever asked her what she wanted.
He typed a long paragraph, then deleted it. He wasn't very good at comforting people; what he said would likely only make her angrier. In the end, he only sent two words.
[Sorry.]
The reply came quickly.
[No need to apologize. You didn't do anything wrong. I just feel a bit tired, that's all.]
[As for the questions you asked, I'll answer you one more time. Karuizawa still values you highly. However, the reason your date frequency has decreased is likely because of Matsushita. Matsushita also has feelings for you. Once you go public, their friendship might end. So for now, you can't go public, which means going to conspicuous places together is out.
Therefore, for your next date, go to the library or the lakeside on the artificial island—the place where I wanted to kick the railing before. It's very quiet, almost no one goes there. Just bring a book, bring a drink, sit together, look at the scenery, and talk. Also, as for whether she's happy, you'll know just by looking at her eyes. The way she looks at you is different from the way she looks at others.]
Hachiman read through these messages one by one and then typed a line.
[Okay. Thanks a lot.]
[No problem. Since I've already been dragged in by you, advising you on a date is whatever. It's all I can do now anyway.]
Hachiman looked at the line, sensing something he didn't quite understand hidden in that last sentence. But he didn't press further; he just sent another "Thank you" and placed his phone by his pillow.
By now, the night outside was deep, and the room was silent. Hachiman stared at the ceiling, replaying Kushida's words in his head.
'Library, seaside, talking. The way she looks at you is different from the way she looks at others.'
He closed his eyes and imagined the way Karuizawa looked at him, realizing he couldn't quite tell the difference. Because he felt quite a few people had eyes like that—sometimes Yuigahama did, occasionally Isshiki Iroha did, and in this world, Ichinose often did, and occasionally Horikita or Kushida did as well.
"..."
Thinking of this, Hachiman instantly felt that this piece of advice from Kushida wasn't quite reliable.
Thinking about it seriously felt terrifying—as if he were some kind of male incubus.
But he remembered Kushida's words—Karuizawa wasn't angry; she was waiting.
So he picked up his phone and opened the chat with Karuizawa.
[Are you free tomorrow?]
After sending it, he put his phone by his pillow and waited. This time, the reply came quickly.
[Yes. What's up?]
[Want to go to the library? I heard the scenery there is nice. We can bring a book and sit for the afternoon. It avoids the crowded shopping district and reduces the risk of running into acquaintances.]
The other side was silent for a few seconds.
[Okay. What time?]
[Two in the afternoon?]
[Okay.]
Hachiman looked at that "Okay," thought for a bit, and typed another line.
[You can also initiate contact with me. My not initiating isn't because I don't want to. It's because I don't know what to say. I'm afraid of saying the wrong thing.]
This time, the reply was a bit slower than before.
[I know.]
Just two words. But looking at them, Hachiman suddenly felt Kushida was right. She wasn't angry; she was just waiting.
He put down his phone, rolled over, and pulled the blanket over his shoulders. Tomorrow at 2 PM, the library. Not a cinema, not a place where he needed to carefully select a film—just the library. Bring a book, bring a drink, sit together, look at the scenery, and talk.
It didn't seem that hard.
He closed his eyes, the corner of his mouth twitching slightly.
Having done all this, Hachiman remembered another matter.
That was, he had never told Horikita. Since being caught by her at the cinema that day, he knew he had to tell her sooner or later. Not because she had any right to know, but because he felt she should hear it from him rather than from someone else.
But he had dragged it out for several days, never finding the right time. Asking her out specifically to say it was too deliberate, like announcing something momentous. Waiting until school started would be too late, making it look like he was hiding something.
He thought for a while and decided that sending a message would be the most appropriate. No need to be face-to-face, no awkwardness, and she would have time to process it.
And so, he picked up his phone and opened the chat with Horikita. His finger hovered over the screen for a few seconds, and then he began to type.
[Horikita, as you know, my goal is to become a househusband. However, while I have a target I want to conquer, I lack experience in dealing with girls, meaning my 'conquest ability' is basically zero. So, I wanted to find a girl to act as a dating partner for practice. The person I've chosen now is Karuizawa... No, we are actually dating to see how it goes.]
After typing it, he read it over, feeling the phrasing was too stiff, but he didn't know how to change it. Perhaps because it was near bedtime, he let out a yawn while pressing the send button.
However, surprisingly, the moment his finger touched the screen, the space before his eyes suddenly lit up.
It wasn't the light from the phone screen; it was a blindingly white light that surged in from all directions. Hachiman instinctively squinted, and the phone in his hand slipped onto the bed. He tried to raise his hand to block the light, only to find his arm felt as if it were being weighed down by something; he couldn't move.
The white light exploded before his eyes, then gradually receded. He blinked, adjusting to the light, and then froze.
He was still in his dorm room. The bed, the desk, the Beaucarnea recurvata on the windowsill—everything was exactly as it had been a moment ago. But there was someone else in front of him.
Long black hair, reddish eyes, standing by the bed, looking down at him.
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