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Translator: penny
Chapter: 3
Chapter Title: Unexpected Awakening
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How did things end up like this?
Right, it all started with Kim Tae-yang.
My boyfriend hadn't just cheated on me with this guy's girlfriend—he'd gone and sent a video of it, too.
'Why?'
Just yesterday, he was my precious boyfriend. But now? Honestly, I didn't feel a shred of that affection anymore. I even thought that if he got some payback, it might be no more than he deserved.
Anyone in my shoes would feel the same way.
Of course, I had my own part to play in Kim Tae-yang pulling something like that.
Congenital hyposensitivity.
I was seventeen.
At an age that felt both too soon and too late, I had my first relationship—and my first intimate contact. And from that, I realized one harsh truth.
I might just be the type who couldn't feel sexual pleasure properly.
It wasn't that I felt nothing at all, but it was way weaker than what others seemed to experience.
So after that, we barely had any physical intimacy.
Because of my hyposensitivity, I showed no real reaction during it, which ended up hurting my partner's feelings.
I figured it was better not to bother with it at all.
I threw myself into exercise to overcome it, too.
They said working out could help treat hyposensitivity.
Looking back now, that was the root cause of everything.
I got so obsessed with training that I neglected my boyfriend—not just that, but I refused any intimacy, and eventually, Kim Tae-yang snapped.
I could forgive the cheating since I was at fault, but filming a video and sending it to someone else? What the hell was he thinking?
All those times I'd defended him fiercely on social media felt like a massive black mark on my history now.
And at the same time, I felt a pang of guilt toward the man sitting in front of me.
'It's because of me...'
Before Kim Tae-yang wormed his way in, this couple must have been really close.
I could tell the moment I stepped into the apartment.
A hair straightener, comb, stockings—all sorts of things a woman would use were scattered around his place.
Those traces squeezed at my heart.
So even when the guy said he was going to post the video on social media to get revenge on Kim Tae-yang, I wondered if I even had the right to stop him.
And yet, I'd brazenly opened my mouth anyway.
'Please... hold off on that...'
Even I thought it was the lamest response possible.
I wasn't really trying to stop him from getting revenge on Kim Tae-yang.
I was just scared that this whole mess—the root of which was me—would jeopardize my social media income.
But the guy accepted it readily.
Instead, he came up with another idea.
He said he'd give me exactly what I'd done to him.
I'd already blocked one round of his revenge, so I couldn't refuse this one, too.
'Better than it going public on social media...'
For someone like me with hyposensitivity, physical intimacy didn't mean all that much anyway.
It wasn't like it'd wear my body down or anything. If anything, it felt like paying my dues, and that eased the guilt buried somewhere deep inside.
Plus, he promised no full penetration unless I wanted it.
So I agreed to go along with his revenge plan.
'As if I'd ever want that.'
Someone with my condition would never ask for it.
"Looks like it's filming well."
"..."
I swallowed hard and stared straight ahead.
I posted photos and videos on social media every day, but this time, knowing I was being recorded felt so awkward.
This was all for sending to Kim Tae-yang, right?
I wondered what his reaction would be.
No matter what, he'd always hidden his true self around me, pretending to be such a nice guy.
Would he get furious? Or, seeing my blank expression from the hyposensitivity, would he feel relieved?
The guy finished setting up his phone and sat down next to me.
The sofa was narrow, but even accounting for that, our shoulders were close enough to brush. I flinched in surprise and started to pull away for a moment, then stopped myself.
We were about to do way more intimate things anyway—freaking out over this would just be weird.
"Shall we get started, then?"
"...Yeah."
My mouth went dry from the tension, and my body felt stiff as a board.
He seemed nervous too, hesitating for a long while before placing his hand on my thigh.
This level of contact didn't faze me.
His hand trailed up my thigh, my waist, and to the nape of my neck.
Then, boldly, it ventured toward the edge of my chest.
And I felt relieved.
'Ah, just as I thought.'
No sensation at all.
Just the rough texture of his large, calloused hand.
Honestly, I'd been a little anxious.
What if being touched by a guy who wasn't my boyfriend made me feel something?
What if... I ended up wanting him to go all the way?
But no, it was nothing like that.
My hyposensitivity was as strong as ever.
That's when the hand that had been caressing the back of my neck shifted to support my head.
And he turned my body to face him.
No one that sharp would miss what he was about to do.
Maybe that's why my face involuntarily scrunched up for a second.
'A kiss... I hate that...'
It wasn't some pure maiden talk about saving kisses for my boyfriend.
I just hated it.
It felt suffocating, stuffy, and sometimes there'd be cigarette breath or some other gross smell from the guy.
Other kinds of intimacy at least let you enjoy seeing your partner's excited reactions, but kisses? No fun there.
I had no choice but to close my eyes and endure it.
Hoping it wouldn't last long.
I'd barely shut my eyes when darkness fell over my vision.
His face must be close now.
Then our lips touched.
As expected, no feeling at all.
That is, until then.
Something hot and thick slipped gently between my lips.
And in that instant, I opened my eyes wide and shoved him away.
"Wh-what was that just now?"
"Huh?"
I was so flustered I could barely get the words out.
It was just a kiss, nothing more.
But something... I felt something.
A strange sensation.
My head went blank, my waist trembled.
For a brief moment, it felt good.
So I was shocked.
This couldn't happen.
"No... it's nothing."
"Should I keep going?"
"Yeah...."
When he leaned in again, I was the one shoving my face forward first.
Not because I was being proactive.
I was just curious.
I needed to know, as quickly as possible, if that feeling really came from the kiss.
This time, both our mouths were already half-open, so the moment our lips met, our tongues intertwined.
"Mmgh... haah... nngh."
I couldn't tell whose mouth those wet, slurping sounds were coming from.
One moment I'd be swirling my tongue around his mouth, the next sucking on his like it was candy.
Without realizing it, I'd tilt my head for a deeper kiss or press my body closer.
And once again—no, even more than before—my head grew hazy, my heart pounded wildly.
Not only that, but everywhere his rough hands touched felt scorching hot, and his normal male scent and movements started feeling... erotic.
Even as my breath ran short, I didn't want to pull away. We devoured each other's air, then exhaled it back.
At first, he'd been holding my head, but now I was gripping his with my own hands.
Not just gripping, really—if anyone saw us, it'd look like we were embracing.
This sensation meant so much to me.
"Ah..."
So when he gently pushed me back to end the kiss, a regretful sigh slipped from my lips unbidden.
I wanted to dive right back in.
"We can't just film kissing the whole time."
"..."
With that, he started caressing my thigh again.
Just like at the beginning.
But my reaction was completely different.
"Hngh..."
The sound that escaped me caught me off guard, and I clamped my hand over my mouth.
'What? Why?'
It was just my thigh, nothing more, but every touch made my body twitch, and when he squeezed my toned muscles from all that exercise, my mouth fell open on its own.
Next came my shoulder and neck.
Not even particularly stimulating touches, but hot breaths escaped me anyway.
By the time his hand neared my chest, my eyes were glazing over, and my previously tense body was shifting into a more open posture, as if begging for more.
Responding to that, the teasing hand finally cupped my breast.
"W-wait, hold on a sec... ah... mmh... "
"You okay?"
"Ah..."
"If it's too much, we can stop here?"
"No, that's not it..."
Something was changing in my body.
I was getting wet.
Sitting down like this, I could feel it clearly.
Touched by a stranger—not my boyfriend—and despite my hyposensitivity, I was soaking.
That inexplicable guilt mixed with an explosive pleasure I'd never felt before, creating a bizarre feeling.
'Is this why Tae-yang cheated?'
The thought slipped out, one I shouldn't have had.
'What am I even thinking...'
'No, this is just helping with his revenge... I'm a victim here too.'
Revenge for ruining their happy relationship.
Revenge for him cheating on me.
And just a tiny bit of curiosity.
All of it combined, and I ended up making the suggestion to him a little early.
"Um... could you maybe... go all the way?"
The next day, Kim Tae-yang had one video waiting from his girlfriend.