"Whoa, easy there!" Julien said, raising his hands, one good, one in a bandage.
He made sure to widen his eyes to the perfect expression of 'terror' and 'cowardice'.
"Please! Don't stab the owner, which I mean, me!"
Chris growled, his muscles twitching as he prepared to jump.
Alice's single visible eye glowed with green fire, and the temperature in the room dropped ten degrees.
"Stay back!" Julien shouted at them.
"Don't try to be heroes. He has a rusty piece of a knife, and we can't compete with a weapon of that quality!"
The hunter, Viper, grinned at his fear.
His yellow teeth looked like a graveyard for hygiene.
"Smart kid," Viper sneered, pressing the blade closer to Julien's nose.
"You know your place, so now, give me the entirety of the potion, also the money, and whatever is in that vault."
"Look," Julien whimpered, leaning away from the blade.
"We can work this out so you don't have to rob us. I can even give you a discount and even Five credits off! That's... that's like, half a sandwich in this district!"
"Five credits?" Viper spat.
"Do I look like a beggar?"
He swung his sword to the side and smashed a glass jar filled with Alice's decorative rocks from trash.
CRASH.
"My Grave Dirt!" Alice hissed from the shadows.
"Do you know how hard it is to import dirt?"
"Shut up, witch!" Viper yelled, swinging the sword wildly.
"Next one is your head if you don't open the vault! Now!"
"I can't!" Julien pleaded.
"My arm is already broken, as you can see, and I can't carry the heavy boxes from the back because the inventory is... very packed."
"Then make him do it!" Viper pointed his sword at Chris.
"Hey, Big Foot! Go and get the loot for me!"
"He can't!" Julien interjected quickly.
"Look at him. He has +20 Strength but -50 in Dexterity, so he breaks everything he touches. Last week, he tried to pet a cat and accidentally shaved its head!"
Chris blinked. "I did?"
"Yes!" Julien insisted.
"If he goes into the vault, he'll crush the delicate, expensive potions! It has to be someone with a gentle touch!"
Viper looked around, frustrated.
His eyes landed on the corner where Alice was sitting.
"Then her!" Viper roared. "The creepy girl! Hey! You get up and bring me the box!"
Julien looked at the corner.
He tilted his head, looking confused.
"Who?" Julien asked.
"Her!" Viper pointed with his sword. "The girl in the blanket who looks like she hasn't showered in a decade!"
Julien looked at the empty rocking chair.
"Sir," Julien whispered, his voice trembling. "There's nobody there."
Viper froze.
He looked back at the chair.
It was empty.
The blanket was gone.
The skull was gone.
Even the girl was gone.
"What..." Viper rubbed his eyes with his free hand. "She was just there and she even hissed at me!"
"Sir, are you feeling okay?" Julien asked concernedly.
"The gases in District 9 can cause hallucinations. Maybe you should sit down? I can sell you a [Potion of Clarity] for cheap 40 credits."
"I'm not crazy!" Viper screamed.
He spun in a circle, slashing at the empty air.
"Where did she go? Is she invisible? Is this a trick?"
"There is no girl," Chris added helpfully, reading the room. "Just us bros running a business."
"This place..." Viper backed away, sweat pouring down his face.
"This place is wrong. Whatever. I'll get the loot myself!"
He shoved Julien aside and stormed toward the curtain.
"No! Don't!" Julien cried out very unconvincingly.
"The vault is... as light as a feather!"
Viper tore the curtain aside.
He expected a steel door and gold bars.
He expected stacks of magical items lined up in front of the heavy box.
But all he could see was a hallway, a closet door, and a pile of chicken bones on the floor.
"Where is it?" Viper roared, turning back to Julien.
"Where's the vault?"
"It's... metaphysical?" Julien offered.
"You lied to me!" Viper screamed.
He raised his sword to charge.
But then, he felt something.
Something small and furry. He felt something was running up the inside of his pant leg.
"AH!" Viper yelped, slapping his thigh.
"What is that? What is touching me?"
"Stuart!" Alice's voice echoed from the ceiling vents.
"Go for the ankles!"
"Get it off! Get it off!" Viper started jumping up and down, doing a frantic dance that looked like a mix of tap dancing and a seizure.
He dropped his sword and started clawing his pants.
A skeletal rat, Stuart, popped its head out of Viper's waistband, squeaked menacingly, and then dove back in.
"IT'S INSIDE ME! IT'S COLD!" Viper shrieked.
"IT'S TOUCHING PLACES NO RAT SHOULD TOUCH!"
He tripped over his own feet, spinning in a circle, slapping his butt.
"Chris," Julien sighed, dropping the 'scared merchant' act.
"He's disturbing the ambience."
"On it," Chris grinned.
He walked up to the dancing thief and waited for Viper to spin around, and then delivered a casual, open-palm slap to the back of the head.
THWACK.
Viper's eyes rolled back into his skull.
He crumbled to the floor like a sack of wet flour.
The skeletal rat scurried out of his pants, looked at Julien, gave a tiny salute, and ran back to the closet.
"Clean up on Aisle One," Chris said, nudging the unconscious body with his boot.
"What do we do with him? Throw him in the street?"
"No," Julien said, looking at the sleeping thief. "We can't just throw him out. He saw... well, he didn't see much, but he knows we have potions."
"We could feed him to the basement," Alice suggested, dropping down from the ceiling rafters like a spider.
"The new slime is forming. It's already hungry."
"No feeding people to the slime," Julien scolded. "We are a legitimate business."
Ding-Dong.
The funeral bell chimed again.
Julien, Chris, and Alice froze.
They looked at the unconscious body on the floor.
"Hide him!" Julien hissed.
"Where?" Chris panicked. He looked around. "The closet is full of bones!"
"Just... chair!" Julien pointed.
Chris grabbed Viper by the collar, dragged him behind the counter, and propped him up in a wooden chair.
He grabbed a pair of sunglasses from where? Who knows and shoved them onto Viper's face.
He crossed Viper's arms.
"Natural," Chris whispered. "Very natural."
The door opened.
A woman walked in.
She wasn't a poor scavenger, her outfit was sleek, fitted leather armour dyed a deep red.
A longbow was strapped to her back, and her blonde hair was tied in a practical ponytail.
Julien recognised her immediately.
It was Milana.
The A-Rank Archer from the 'Azure Knights'.
The one who had saved him from the beast on the day of his Awakening.
'Well, not saved but still.'
[Streetwise Analysis]
[Target: Milana(Rank: A - Ranger).]
[Status: Exhausted.]
[Intent: Curiosity / Resupply.]
"Hello?" Milana called out, stepping into the shop.
She looked around at the dusty shelves, the broken jar on the floor, and the general eeriness.
"Julien?" she asked, spotting him behind the counter. Her eyes widened in recognition.
"The kid from the apartment block? You're still alive?"
"Milana!" Julien smiled, genuinely happy to see someone who wasn't trying to rob him.
"I am. Thanks to you. Welcome to... my humble establishment."
"You opened a shop?" Milana walked closer, looking impressed but confused.
"Here? In the Hover? It's... cosy."
"It has its benefits," Julien said.
"Can I interest you in anything? We have... rocks. And... more rocks."
Milana laughed. "I'm actually looking for supplies. My team is heading into a raid, and the Guild store is out of Iron Skin Potions. I heard a rumour in the Hoven that a new place opened up."
"Rumours travel fast," Julien said. "We do have Iron Skin. In fact, we specialise in it."
He placed the grey bottle on the counter.
Milana picked it up.
"This looks... potent. Better than the Guild standard. Does it really work?"
"It works perfectly," Julien promised.
"Is it safe?" Milana asked, eyeing the grey sludge.
"No offence, but this is a creepy basement shop. I don't want to turn into a statue after taking it."
"A valid concern," Julien nodded. "That's why we conduct rigorous live testing."
"Live testing?"
"Yes," Julien gestured to the corner behind the counter.
"In fact, we were just concluding a demonstration."
He pointed to Viper, who was slumped in the chair, wearing sunglasses, completely unconscious.
"This is... Mr. Tester," Julien introduced. "He volunteered to demonstrate the durability of our product."
Milana looked at Viper. "Is he... asleep?"
"He's meditating," Chris interjected quickly. "Focusing on his skin."
"Watch this," Julien said.
He looked at Chris. "Assistant? The durability test, please."
Chris nodded.
He reached into his belt and pulled out a dagger, the one he had confiscated from a previous thug.
Milana's eyes went wide. "Wait, what are you-"
Stab.
Chris plunged the dagger straight into Viper's chest.