The morning was unnervingly quiet. The kind of quiet that presses against your chest and makes every heartbeat loud.
Cassian and I arrived at the clearing by the pier just after sunrise. The mist clung low to the water, making the world feel smaller, tighter, like it had folded in on itself. Jude was already there, standing on the edge of the pier, hands in his pockets, shoulders squared, watching the waves.
He didn't look at us immediately. He let us approach, letting the tension stretch between us like a taut wire.
"Rowan," he said finally, voice low, careful. "I've been thinking since yesterday. About what I want. About what we… are."
I kept my expression neutral. The truth was, my pulse was fast, my stomach tight, and my chest a storm of nerves and desire. I could feel Cassian behind me, a solid presence, and Jude in front of me, magnetic as ever.
"You don't get to dictate that," I said finally. "Not now. Not ever. You can state what you want, but it doesn't mean I'll give it. And it certainly doesn't mean Cassian will step aside."
Jude's gaze softened for just a moment. A flicker of something human beneath the intensity. Then it hardened again. "I'm not asking him to. I'm asking you to listen to me. To see what I feel."
Cassian stepped closer, hand brushing the small of my back. His warmth and steady confidence were a tether I didn't realize I needed until it was there. "And you're going to say it?" he asked, voice low. "Here? Now?"
"I don't want an audience," I said. My words weren't sharp—they were deliberate. Controlled. But my pulse betrayed me.
The mist curled around our legs as I walked a step closer to Jude, closing the gap slowly, deliberately. "You've come back. Fine. You're here. But understand this: this isn't about who can chase me harder. It's about honesty. And if either of you crosses a line—whether with words or actions—you leave."
Jude's eyes flickered. "I… understand."
Cassian's hand slid from my back to my hip, pressing lightly. "Rowan…" His voice was almost a warning.
I didn't flinch. "I'm not stepping back."
The silence stretched. The air between us thickened until it felt almost impossible to breathe. Jude stepped forward, closer this time. Not threatening, not demanding, but close enough that I could feel the subtle heat from him. "Rowan, I—"
I cut him off, holding up my hand. "I'm listening. But you speak one truth at a time. No manipulation, no excuses. You say what you feel, I respond, and that's it."
He nodded slowly. "Fair."
And then he spoke.
"I can't stop thinking about you. About both of you. I left because I was losing myself, but staying away… made me realize what I actually feel. I don't want to control you. I don't want to take from him. I just… want a chance to be honest, without expectation, without demand."
Cassian's jaw clenched, subtle, almost invisible. But I felt it. Felt the tension coil like a spring ready to snap.
I took a deep breath. The tide lapped at the pier, soft and insistent, almost like it was echoing my heartbeat. I moved closer to Cassian, letting him know, without words, that he mattered. That he was not expendable.
Then I faced Jude. "I hear you. But hearing doesn't mean agreeing. And it doesn't mean forgiving. I'm not yours to claim again, not without effort, not without honesty, not without… proof."
His gaze hardened. "I'll show you. I'll prove it. Whatever it takes."
I stepped back, letting the space settle. My chest burned, my stomach twisted, my pulse roared. I was standing between two men who both wanted me in different ways. And this time, I wouldn't be passive. I wouldn't shrink.
The wind picked up, and a gull cried overhead. The mist thickened, wrapping us in a bubble that made the world outside seem distant, unimportant.
I knew one thing. Whatever happened next, it would change everything.
And for the first time in a long time, I felt alive.
Because tomorrow, I would have to make a decision.
Or let the storm decide for me.