*****
Finally, he flicked the screen to bring up the main chat. Rows of usernames and blinking messages appeared like a carnival of noise.
[shut-in NEET]: Oh, you're finally online, admin! The system said the change-nickname function can only be turned on by you. Can you turn it on now, at least before you log off again after saying a few sentences?
[Sleeping Ruler]: Yeah, no.
Deeno smirked at his own bluntness, almost hearing the indignant squawk that would follow.
[shut-in NEET]: You're inhuman! In the first place, what's with these nicknames? How come everyone else got cool-looking or cool-sounding ones, but look at mine!
The message practically radiated wounded pride. Deeno pictured him jabbing at his keyboard with teary anime eyes.
[Sleeping Ruler]: Wow! So Saitama's nickname is also cool by your words, right?
[shut-in NEET]: Huh—well, that's his hero title, so it doesn't really matter if it's also his nickname here.
[Sleeping Ruler]: By that logic then, your title is true, so why would it matter?
[shut-in NEET]: It matters! I—I'm not a NEET, I'm a gamer! And also, I'm not a shut-in… if my guess is right, I also have works that you've watched or read. I died outside and reincarnated in another world!
Deeno's lips twitched.
[Sleeping Ruler]: Ah, you mean that—pffft… ha-ha-ha! That's a unique way to die. I rolled on the ground laughing when I watched that scene. Just recalling it makes me want to laugh again!
He wiped at his eyes, shoulders shaking, remembering the absurdity of it.
[Elven Sniper]: I'm not trying to sound rude, admin-san, but I don't think you should make fun of someone's death.
Her message felt polite but stiff, like someone awkwardly raising a hand in class.
[The Witch of the Void]: Agreed. Even though he's alive right now and reincarnated, it still feels insensitive.
[Geo Archon]: Indeed. The death of someone is not something to be enjoyed.
His words were heavy, dignified—Deeno could almost picture him sipping tea with furrowed brows.
[Caped Baldy]: Yeah yeah, and also, turn on the nickname change.
[Sleeping Ruler]: Hmm… oh! Is this that—bullying? Wow, to think you're all close enough already to target me.
[shut-in NEET]: Heh. That's what you get! You shouldn't have made fun of my death. 'Cause no matter who it is, no one deserves to get laughed at as they die!
[Sleeping Ruler]: Wow! To think there's someone more shameless than me. You really meet all kinds of people in life, huh? And stop stealing someone else's line to look cool!
[Elven Sniper]: We're not exactly trying to be mean… sorry if it came out that way.
Her text carried a nervous kindness, like she was bowing apologetically on the other side of the screen.
[Sleeping Ruler]: Oh, you don't have to worry 'bout it. I don't really mind. You're all correct after all. I shouldn't make fun of him even though his death was from shock because—
[shut-in NEET]: AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! Don't—don't say it! I apologize!
The frantic text almost had Deeno snorting out loud.
[Sleeping Ruler]: Ehem… because he thought he got run over by a tractor moving slowly. He thought it was a truck—HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Just thinking about it makes me feel like I'll explode!
[Caped Baldy]: HAHAHAHAHA! I've never heard anything like that before!
[Geo Archon]: …Looks like I'm lacking context here.
[Elven Sniper]: Kazuma-kun, I know I shouldn't laugh at someone's death but—pfft… sorry, I can't help it!
[shut-in NEET]: You already laughed, what do you mean "in advance"! Damn admin!
[The Witch of the Void]: Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! That's a good laugh. I haven't laughed this much in a while. That's such a unique way to go, I can't help it!
[Sleeping Ruler]: See? Who said about not laughing at someone's death? Well, I had my fun already. Now, let's talk about serious business.
["......"]
The silence in chat was almost deafening. Deeno could imagine them all staring blankly at their screens.
[Sleeping Ruler]: So, what should we talk about?
THUD—
[The Witch of the Void]: You're the one who said we should talk about it!
It felt like she'd fallen off her chair in frustration.
[Caped Baldy]: …It's not the nickname?
[The Witch of the Void]: Of course it's not! …Right?
[shut-in NEET]: Eh, it's not?
[Sleeping Ruler]: Yeah, I thought it was about that. Guess not. Anyway, joking aside, I'll give the honors to Miss Mayumi and Mister Zhongli.
[Elven Sniper]: Eh… me? Ehem—Is it about the system functions?
Her hesitant message felt like she was adjusting her glasses, caught off guard by being suddenly called on in front of the class.
[Sleeping Ruler]: Yeah. Have you all already checked the functions?
[Geo Archon]: I have looked into it. The current system functions are the shop, daily check-in, and missions.
Deeno could almost see him speaking calmly with closed eyes, one hand behind his back like a dignified old scholar.
[Elven Sniper]: In the shop, you can upload an item, magic, abilities, and other things. It's the system that puts the price if you're trying to sell it. Of course, you can also set your own prices, and if someone buys it, the points go to you. You can also sell directly to the system. But… there's a limit, so you can't just upload the same item to exploit loopholes.
Her words read like a teacher explaining homework, carefully typed, no typos. Deeno pictured her sitting perfectly straight, hands folded on her lap while typing.
[Sleeping Ruler]: That's a shame then. And here I thought it would be an easy way to farm points.
He sighed dramatically, tilting his head back against the rooftop floor.
[Geo Archon]: The missions are given by the system itself. After completion, rewards are distributed according to contribution. We can also commission our own quests for members, but the reward must come from the commissioner, not the system.
[Caped Baldy]: And also, the nickname change function.
Even through text, his tone felt flat and stubborn, like he was scratching the back of his bald head while staring blankly at the screen.
[shut-in NEET]: Question, Admin.
[Sleeping Ruler]: What is it? If you're asking me whether I'll give you free stuff by selling it at 0 points, then no.
[shut-in NEET]: Tch! Cheapskate! That's not what I wanted to ask! …Though if there's even a little kindness in your heart, maybe—
[Sleeping Ruler]: Sorry to tell you, but there's nothing. Well, it'd be a different story if the one asking was a beautiful woman that's my type.
[shut-in NEET]: You're a demon! To think you'd choose hoes before bros… well, I guess it's impressive you've got your priorities straight.
Deeno smirked, stretching one arm over his eyes.
[Sleeping Ruler]: I'm no demon. I'm an Angel—a fallen one. And of course, I'd rather be surrounded by beauties than men.
[The Witch of the Void]: The flow just goes off-track… what are you two even talking about? If you want to chat about those kinds of things, then do it in private.
Her message radiated exasperation. Deeno imagined her pressing fingers to her temple, trying to stop herself from sighing.
[Sleeping Ruler]: Oh, but if it's Natsuki-chan asking, I might give her a weapon—albeit reluctantly. Well, even if you're not exactly my type, you're still cute, so it's fine.
[The Witch of the Void]: …Not your type, huh? He-he-he. Are you talking about my figure? You've got guts. I don't care if you're an angel or a fallen one—just wait until we meet. He-he-he. And don't add "chan" to my name.
Her words carried that dangerous sweetness of someone smiling while plotting your death. Deeno chuckled, nervously adjusting his posture.
[Elven Sniper]: What about me, Admin-kun? I think being in your strike zone is a matter of course.
The text came with a teasing flourish. Deeno pictured her batting her eyelashes like an anime heroine.
[Sleeping Ruler]: Sure! What kind of item do you want?
[Elven Sniper]: I'll let you decide. I'm just curious about the things in other worlds.
[shut-in NEET]: This is discrimination! I'm calling the gender equality enforcers!
[Sleeping Ruler]: Unfortunately, there's traffic on the dimensional road, so they can't come here.
[shut-in NEET]: …Wait, don't just brush me off! Anyway, what I wanted to ask is—you. You're the demon lord from Tensura, right? Seeing as you know many cultured works, have you transmigrated? Or do you have an ability to travel from your world to Earth or vice versa?
[Sleeping Ruler]: Oh, it's kind of complicated… you can just think of it as me being a transmigrator and not at the same time.
He typed with a with a bored but amused expression, purposely leaving it vague.
[shut-in NEET]: The mysterious vibe, huh…
[Sleeping Ruler]: Shut it! It's cooler this way.
[Caped Baldy is Offline]
[Sleeping Ruler]: Hmm? …Pfft! Ha-ha-ha, rage quit!
He laughed, covering his mouth.
[shut-in NEET]: You're something else… You should be careful not to get punched when you meet him. No—better yet, go far away from me so I don't get caught in the crossfire.
[The Witch of the Void]: I have classes now, so I'll log off.
[The Witch of the Void is Offline]
[Geo Archon]: I must also go to my next appointment.
[Geo Archon is Offline]
[Elven Sniper]: I need to head to school now too, so later.
[Elven Sniper is Offline]
[shut-in NEET]: I'll go do a quest then—
[Sleeping Ruler (Admin) is Offline]
[shut-in NEET]: Whoa… really…
[shut-in NEET is Offline]
—
As I walked to the campus gate I spotted Nonoa leaning casually on the side, arms crossed, her bag slung loosely over her shoulder. She looked like she'd been waiting forever.
"Yo! What's up?" I raised a hand, trying to act cool.
Nonoa's eyes narrowed. "Dinocchi, you're late. I was legit waiting here for almost an hour."
"Eh? Seriously? My bad, my bad." I scratched my cheek awkwardly. "I accidentally fell asleep in the classroom. Alya and Kuze probably gave up on waking me… I was the only one left in there, hehe."
Her gaze sharpened into a deadpan glare that could kill a lesser man. "…So, let me get this straight. You slept, drooled on your desk probably, and I stood here like an idiot waiting for you. For an hour."
"Oi, oi, I didn't drool!" I waved my hands defensively. "At least, I don't think I did…"
"Suspicious." Nonoa tilted her head with mock seriousness. "If I check your uniform pocket right now, will I find a tissue with evidence on it?"
"Wha—No! What kind of detective are you?!"
"The kind that solves the Case of the Missing Boyfriend Who Can't Arrive on Time," she replied, smirking like she'd just cracked the code of the century.
I groaned. "Come on, give me a break. You make it sound like I'm a criminal on trial."
"You are guilty of being late." She pointed at me dramatically like some prosecutor in a courtroom drama. "The evidence is overwhelming."
"…Objection." I raised a finger.
"Overruled," she shot back instantly, lips twitching into a grin.
I sighed, defeated. "So what's the punishment then, Judge Nonoa?"
"Hmm…" She tapped her chin like she was pondering something truly profound. "Punishment shall be… buying me ice cream."
"That's not a punishment, that's extortion."
"That's called justice, Dinocchi."
"More like daylight robbery," I muttered under my breath.
"What was that?" Her sharp ears picked it up immediately.
"Ah—nothing! I said 'light tastes hobby'! Like… eating ice cream as a hobby, y'know?" I laughed nervously, rubbing the back of my neck.
She gave me another long, blank stare. "You're lucky you're cute when you're panicking."
My heart skipped. "…Wait, did you just—"
"Don't overthink it." She cut me off, walking ahead with a smug smile. "Now hurry up, slowpoke, or we'll reach the apartment at midnight."
I hurried after her. "Oi, wait for me! You're the one who said I was late, now you're running off ahead?"
"Consider it interest on the time you wasted."
"You charge interest now?! What am I, your loan?"
She glanced back at me with mischievous eyes. "A loan with terrible returns."
"…That's just hurtful."
"Then be on time next time."
We fell into step together, weaving through the familiar streets. The evening breeze carried the scent of grilled food from a nearby stall, and for a moment I wondered if bribing her with takoyaki would lessen my crime.
"Say, Nonoa…" I started carefully.
"Hmm?"
"What if I said I overslept because I was dreaming about you?" I grinned, testing the waters.
Her steps faltered slightly. She shot me a side-eye, cheeks puffing faintly. "Haaah? That's the lamest excuse I've ever heard."
"Oi, oi, you're supposed to swoon, not insult me!"
"Sorry, I don't swoon for liars."
"But it's true! I think it was about you dragging me to karaoke again."
She blinked. "…Eh? Really?"
"Yeah. You forced me to sing, and the mic exploded."
"Pffft—" She covered her mouth, trying not to laugh. "That does sound like me. But also, wow, rude! Are you saying my singing is so bad it blows up electronics?"
I smirked. "No, I'm saying my singing is so bad the mic couldn't handle it."
She stared at me for a second, then burst out laughing. "You know what, I believe that. Dinocchi the Mic Destroyer."
"Oi! At least defend my honor a little!"
"Your honor died when you left me waiting for an hour."
"…You're never letting that go, are you?"
"Nope." She stuck her tongue out playfully.
I sighed, but seeing her so cheerful made my chest feel lighter. "Alright, alright. I'll make it up to you."
"You'd better."
We continued down the road, bantering about random things—like whether pineapple belonged on pizza (she was firmly against, I was neutral) and which anime protagonist we'd be if life were a shounen.
Finally, as we turned the corner, our apartment building came into view.
"There it is." Nonoa stretched her arms above her head, yawning lightly. "Home sweet home."
"About time," I muttered, exaggerating my exhaustion. "Walking with you is more draining than PE class."
"Oh? And here I thought spending time with your girlfriend was the highlight of your day."
I froze. "…Tch. You win this round."
Nonoa grinned triumphantly as we stopped at the apartment door. "Of course I do. I always do, Dinocchi."
I shook my head with a helpless smile, reaching for the handle. "Yeah, yeah. Let's head inside.