Mr. Dummura glared at Hinata and Sabrina. His whole head looked like it might explode any second now.
Hinata and Sabrina tried very hard not to burst out laughing, struggling to keep their faces straight as he fumed before them.
Finally, he snapped. "STOP QUESTIONING ME AND JUST PICK UP THE DAMN DUST!!!"
Hinata tilted her head.
"Why are you yelling… Did you forget your meds again or something?"
Sabrina crossed her arms.
"Yeah, and why should we pick it up? That dust isn't ours."
"You delinquents make a mess and never clean up behind you!" he barked, spittle flying.
Elise—Raven Dementia Bloodrose—watched from behind and was sooooo done with this smelly old fossil bullying those poor magical girls. Sure, they were her rivals, but when faced with a common enemy… they stood united.
She narrowed her glowing eyes and thought,
"He said they never tidy up behind them? Meaning they don't wipe their bums after a number two? Urgh… the filthy old git, thinking of their bumbums."
And then her mind flashed back—because of course it did—to that cursed day in class, before her Adolescence Syndrome kicked in, when she was fully tactile and visible to the mortal realm of the academy. Mr. Dummura strolled past her desk and… farted discreetly. Or at least, that's what he thought.
It wasn't just a fart. Oh no… It was a wet, squelchy, eggy waffle of a fart, the kind that deserved its own slow-motion anime scene, complete with wind-blown hair and dramatic "shock lines" radiating across the classroom.
Elise swore, right then and there, that she would get her revenge on him one day—even if it took thirty series of a thousand episodes, three movies, a spinoff holiday special, a dozen light novels with naked anime girls on the cover, and an endless parade of OVAs... she will make it happen!
Meanwhile, the magical girls were stuck in his radius, unable to escape.
Hinata huffed, "Just because we're magical girls doesn't mean we go around sprinkling magical dust all over the floor for fun!"
Sabrina said, "Yeah, we have good aim, and our mana residue always goes directly in their faces and in their mouths."
"If this isn't magic… fairy, magi, magical, starlight, sparkles, pixie dust, astral essence, mana, stardust, cosmic particles, ethereal shimmer… and dust from you girls—then what the hell is it?!"
Mr. Dummura barked, veins throbbing (penis veins throbbing as well, probably) and eyes bulging.
Sabrina kicked the dust in a small circle, frowning.
"Well… dust is usually composed of tiny soil particles, dead skin cells—"
Hinata jumped in, tilting her head.
"—microscopic fibres and other detritus… basically the inevitable residue of life itself."
They both said together,
"Sir, if you paid attention in class, you would know this."
Mr. Dummura stomped his feet at the girls' response,
flailing manically as if he were in the middle of a Dance Dance Revolution frenzy, and said,
"This shows you weren't paying attention in my class! I taught you none of this! You should only learn the things I teach you, and you'll end up… like me."
Both girls physically vomited.
Elise—Raven Dementia Bloodrose—officially had enough. This dust wasn't going to vanish on its own, and the girls actually wanted to learn something, so it was high time to drag Mr. Dumbdumb into action and make him… marginally useful.
She slithered behind Mr. Dummura, moving with the predatory grace of a shadow-hungry vampire. In a single, fluid motion, she tore down his suit trousers, exposing his saggy, white Y-fronts, glaring like a beacon in the darkness.
Y-fronts! Why? Why would anyone wear such disgusting, gross undies? At least wear a thong or some lovely lace panties! I mean… He was ewww—gross and disgusting, so the Y-fronts were quite apropos, I suppose.
Always invisible, Elise's interactions with the physical world while at the academy caused glitches in the matrix, and it took a while for anything she did to register in reality.
It also took time for smells, sounds, and touches from the physical world to reach her, which meant she often acted awkwardly—especially considering all her senses as a vampire girl were cranked up tenfold.
Sight. Smell. Touch. Taste… and orgasmic feel.
Every brush of fabric, stray hair, whiff of sweat, accidental bump, or squeaky sound could send her straight into twitching, writhing chaos. Even the tiniest tickle or scratch could make her groan like a broken human sex toy.
Basically, the entire world was a giant, rude pleasure button—and she was vibrating full blast.
But bum-smoke was definitely not something she wanted to inhale—especially with Mr. Dummura's stench amplified tenfold, or however many folds his bloated belly and saggy ballsack had.
She pulled down his Y-fronts and instantly regretted it—there was an overgrown bush of hair everywhere, like a black hole into the abyss, with deadly dingleberries scattered all around.
Time to light this up before she could make him useful. Elise used her darkness vampire magic—a new Ignite spell she learnt from magic books—that involved using a lighter and rubbing her fingers over the flint wheel.
And poof!! The hair around his bum crack erupted into flames like a miniature volcanic disaster.
Elise sensed a poisonous, toxic gas trap barreling toward her—and she ignited it in a single, flickering motion.
She laughed, wild and gleeful.
"How does it feel to be gaslighted for a change!?"
Particles of burnt bum fluff slowly turned to dust, dropping behind him into the other pile on the floor.
None of the magical girls could see what was happening—his Y-fronts and trousers had just been yanked down from behind, and his flaming bum made him even more furious when he saw the dust below him.
"You've dropped even more of your pixie dust, you hopeless little guttersnipes!! Look at this pathetic mess!! Do you think this is funny?! you fumbling little imps!"
"Sir, we didn't drop it!" Hinata Kitsune said, a small, barely contained laugh slipping past her lips as she glanced at Sabrina.
"Yeah, it wasn't us," Sabrina Catsune added, suppressing a giggle while crossing her arms.
"The dust is dropping out of your ass… We are nowhere near that pile of dust!" Hinata said, stifling another laugh and pointing emphatically.
"Nor do we want to be anywhere near it," Sabrina said, snickering lightly.
Now it was time. Elise—Raven Dementia Bloodrose—glided on Mr. Dummura with the silent, lethal grace of a shadow, moving before it became too late.
The acrid stench of his burning bum threatened to leak through the matrix like a toxin in the night.
With a smooth, fluid motion, she plunged the sweeping bush deep into his now-bare, bushless ass-crack. It sank in with a revolting, wet squelch, wedging stubbornly as if resisting her supernatural touch.
She slipped back into the shadows, eyes glinting, as if she had just unleashed a firework—or something far more dangerous, waiting to erupt at any moment.