Breakfast stretched longer than it should have, mostly because no one seemed in any hurry to let Jay and Keifer escape.
Plates were refilled, tea was poured again, and just when Jay thought they might finally be free—
Keifer's mother cleared her throat.
"So," she said sweetly, folding her hands. "Now that you're married, there are a few important things you should remember."
Jay froze mid-sip. Keifer sighed quietly. "Here we go."
Jay's mother leaned in immediately. "First—never go to bed angry."
Keifer's father shook his head. "No, no. Sometimes going to bed angry is fine. Silence cools tempers."
Jay blinked. "Which one is it?"
"Both," both mothers said together.
Keifer muttered, "That clears everything up."
Jay's father pointed his spoon at Keifer. "Listen carefully. When she says 'do whatever you want,' it does not mean do whatever you want."
Jay nodded solemnly. "Correct."
Keifer's mother added, smiling innocently, "And when she says 'I'm fine,' she is absolutely not."
Keifer glanced at Jay. "You're all conspiring against me."
"Oh, it gets better," Jay's mother said cheerfully. "Always apologize first. Even if you're right."
Keifer's father raised an eyebrow. "Or—hear me out—learn when to pretend you're wrong."
Jay laughed, covering her mouth. "I like his advice."
Keifer groaned. "Traitors. All of you."
Keifer's mother placed a gentle hand on Jay's shoulder. "Feed him properly. A hungry man is an unreasonable man."
Keifer grinned. "Finally, something useful."
Jay's father shot back, "And remember—love isn't about winning arguments. It's about choosing each other on ordinary days."
The room softened for a moment.
Then Keifer's father ruined it by adding, "Also, don't involve parents in your fights."
Jay and Keifer answered together, "Too late."
Laughter burst out again, loud and genuine.
Keifer leaned closer to Jay, whispering, "If we survive this advice, we can survive anything."
She smiled back, eyes shining. "Agreed."
As breakfast ended and the parents drifted into their own conversations, Jay reached for Keifer's hand under the table, squeezing it gently.
Married life, it seemed, came with love, patience, and a lifetime supply of unsolicited advice.