"Hokage-sama, members of the Nara and Yamanaka clans are in a standoff over agricultural boundaries. Neither side will yield."
"They are requesting your mediation."
Hokage Office.
Sarutobi Hiruzen sat with his back to the desk, gazing out the window at the village he built. An ANBU operative knelt behind him, delivering the headache of the day.
"Is it that new plot by the Nakano River?"
"Yes, sir."
Hiruzen sighed, rubbing his temples. That fertile land was supposed to be a joint venture to strengthen the Ino-Shika-Cho alliance. Instead, it had become a muddy wrestling pit for petty grievances.
"Tell the clan heads to prioritize harmony. They must sit down and negotiate a solution themselves."
The ANBU paused. They came to you because they couldn't agree. Sending them back to argue more seems... counterproductive.
But he was a soldier. "Yes, sir." He vanished.
Hiruzen took a long drag from his pipe, exhaling a plume of smoke that obscured his tired face.
Every day. Every single day.
Being Hokage wasn't about glorious battles. It was about zoning laws, budget disputes, and clan egos. The "Professor" felt more like a glorified kindergarten teacher.
He thought of his teacher, Tobirama Senju. If you hadn't sacrificed yourself as a decoy... would you be dealing with this headache instead of me?
Bang!
The heavy oak doors were thrown open without a knock.
A cold voice cut through the smoke.
"Hiruzen. My spies in the Earth Kingdom have been decimated. I need replacements."
A man walked in. Half his face bandaged, leaning on a cane, radiating an aura of gloomy entitlement.
Shimura Danzo.
The Darkness of Shinobi. The 5.5th Hokage (in his own mind). The Collector of Eyes.
Hiruzen swiveled his chair. "Didn't I just assign the latest batch of orphanage graduates to Root?"
"Not enough. I need quality, not just fodder."
Hiruzen frowned. "ANBU is stretched thin. I have no one to spare."
"Then I'll take Academy students."
"Academy students are the future leaves of Konoha. Root is..."
"Hiruzen!"
Danzo slammed his cane on the floor. "Root is the foundation! The great tree of Konoha cannot grow without deep roots to drink the dark water underground. Everything I do is for the village."
Hiruzen puffed on his pipe, silencing the rhetoric with a wall of smoke. "Who do you want?"
"Hatake Kakashi."
"No," Hiruzen said instantly. "Kakashi just lost his father. Root's environment is too oppressive for him right now."
"Pain breeds strength! A weapon without emotion is a weapon without weakness!" Danzo argued. "He is perfect for Root."
"No. I have other plans for Kakashi."
Danzo scowled. "Aburame Shibi."
"I already gave you Aburame Tatsuma. The Aburame clan is loyal, but asking for their heir requires negotiation. You can't just pluck people like flowers."
"You are the Hokage! Order it!"
"Being Hokage isn't absolute tyranny, Danzo!" Hiruzen snapped, enjoying Danzo's frustration. "Besides, Shibi embodies the Will of Fire. He belongs in the light. I have plans for him."
Danzo's eye twitched.
"Then give me Yamashiro Aoba."
"I have plans for him."
"HIRUZEN!"
Danzo's voice cracked. "Plans, plans, plans! You have plans for everyone except me!"
Hiruzen considered. He needed to offer someone or Danzo wouldn't leave.
"I can transfer Might Duy to you. His taijutsu is... persistent. Or his son, Might Guy. They have spirit. They might brighten up your gloomy base."
Danzo looked like he had swallowed a lemon. "Root does not need 'youth.' We do not need untalented civilians who run laps on their hands."
"Too picky," Hiruzen grumbled. "What about Uchiha Obito? He's from a prestigious clan."
"The dead-last? The clown who chokes on fireballs and doesn't have a Sharingan?" Danzo sneered. "He is trash."
Hiruzen sighed. "There is one more. Yuhi Shinku filed a report on a Hyuga boy. Hyuga Aokawa. Shinku says he has a strong will, bravery, and resourcefulness. He survived a wipeout mission."
"Since he's Branch House, the Hyuga might let him go..."
"HIRUZEN!"
Danzo roared, cutting him off.
He stared at his old friend in disbelief. When did you become so shameless?
"First the Green Beasts. Then the Uchiha failure. Now this?"
"Aokawa is a repeater! He failed his finals! He's supposed to be held back a year! 'Brave and resourceful'? Shinku must have hit his head!"
"I don't collect garbage!" Danzo spat. "Is it really so hard to give me one decent tool?"
Hiruzen shrugged helplessly.
Danzo's gloom vanished. He straightened his back, a dangerous glint in his eye.
"Fine. If you want to play games."
He pointed a finger at the Hokage.
"Hiruzen. I want Asuma."