That was him in his previous life.
At first glance, his appearance in this life was quite different, but upon closer inspection, one could still discern many familiar traces.
"I wonder if Senior Yu Qintu is still alive..."
As for the young girl Clarice... she was a Short-Lived Species; under normal circumstances, it would be impossible for her to live until the future he was in.
Qi Zhimu did not dwell on it, nor did he ever have the thought of looking for them; he was merely feeling sentimental.
One must always look forward; whether the past was filled with regrets or beauty, let it remain in the past.
He took a small sachet out of the jade message's storage space, and the image of the young girl's smiling eyes appeared before him.
In his mind, the question Clarice once asked echoed.
"If I were about to die, would Mr. Qi be willing to remember me as much as possible?"
His answer then had been heartfelt, yet it wasn't a solemn promise, nor did it carry much weight.
Ultimately, the relationship between the two was bound only by the tie of friendship.
But... the pity and warmth Clarice had given him before her death were enough to be remembered for eternity.
"Once, there was a gentle girl named Clarice who gave me a hug. I will always remember that warmth, and I will remember her."
This was his belated, formal response after traversing a long span of time.
Putting away the sachet, a type of chinese lute appeared in Qi Zhimu's hand.
The wood was deep and lustrous, the craftsmanship exquisite.
Of all the things he had obtained in his previous life, he had no recollection of only this a type of chinese lute.
Perhaps it was related to an unpleasant experience, which was why that piece of Remembrance hadn't been carried over to this life.
"Forget it."
Recalling the past only added to his sorrow, and the sense of blurriness and missing pieces at the edges was equally unpleasant.
At the thought that the Mara-Struck state of the Xianzhou people was also inextricably linked to Remembrance, he felt even more displeased.
In the hundreds of years since his discharge, Qi Zhimu had never stopped his secret research into the Mara-Struck and the Power of Abundance.
Relying on the biological and Remembrance studies knowledge accumulated from his previous life, he had actually achieved some results.
This kind of behavior was sensitive in the Xianzhou after all; if the Ten Lords Tribunal found out, a Judge would surely come knocking to invite him for "tea."
The Healers of the Mara Department in the Alchemy Commission had a "death-exempt medal," allowing them to research the Mara-Struck and the Power of Abundance legitimately.
However, the Mara Department's primary research focus was on how to cure it, which differed from Qi Zhimu's direction.
Qi Zhimu had never had the thought of curing the mara affliction.
The reason?
A very realistic problem lay before him: if one day the Xianzhou could completely cure the mara affliction, how would life and death be defined for a person then?
The consequences of immortality were already written throughout the bloody lessons in the history of the Xianzhou Alliance.
Endless population expansion, resource struggles, social fragmentation, and the ensuing never-ending turmoil... discussing this topic in detail was more sensitive than anything else.
Therefore, even if the Xianzhou truly could overcome the mara affliction, it absolutely would not and could not be made available to the general public, nor could even a whisper of it be leaked.
People could tolerate certain facts existing in the shadows, but they could not accept them being brought into the light.
The Mara-Struck state was considered an implicit weight maintaining the Order of the Xianzhou; this was one of the unspoken consensuses.
Qi Zhimu only delayed the progression of his mother's mara affliction but did not seek a complete cure for this very reason.
There is always a trade-off; some Pandora's boxes must never be opened.
When he returned home, Qiu Zhiyan had not yet gone to sleep.
Seeing Qi Zhimu enter with his usual expression, her lips twitched slightly, but a moment of dazed vacancy flashed in her eyes.
Qi Zhimu saw this and sighed inwardly.
"It's almost past midnight. Why are you still awake, Mother? Do you have something to say to me?"
At Qi Zhimu's reminder, the vacancy on Qiu Zhiyan's face vanished, and she beckoned him to sit down.
"Lord Zhimu, while you were meeting General Teng Xiao, I thought a lot... You should go back."
"...Mother?"
Qi Zhimu froze; he naturally knew what "going back" referred to.
Qiu Zhiyan took her son's hand, her tone complex.
"I've been losing myself lately, easily forgetting what I was just thinking about... The time must be coming soon..."
"The Mara-Struck state is the fate of the Long-lived Species. I have lived to the ripe old age of 995, yet I've become a shackle that has bound you for most of your life..."
"You don't need to comfort me by saying it was voluntary. Whether I spoke up or not, I was the direct reason influencing your choice."
"Just imagine, if I had died in battle back then like your sister and that damned old man of yours, would you still have chosen to discharge?"
No one knows a son better than his mother, but how could Qi Zhimu not understand his mother's inner struggle?
They both knew the answer, but he didn't want his mother to live the rest of her life in guilt.
One's state of mind often changes slowly with the passage of time, especially for Xianzhou people who are about to fall into the mara affliction.
The closer that day comes, the more the negative emotions buried in the past are magnified several times over.
Qiu Zhiyan's appearance remained that of someone in her early twenties, yet her eyes were filled with the vicissitudes of having seen all the world's affairs.
"Your grandmother, grandfather, and uncle... they all died on the battlefield when I was very young..."
"When we were young, your father and I stood atop a mountain of Abominations' corpses and swore to spend our lives together, vowing to slay every Abomination of Abundance before us."
"At that time, your father was my whole world. Later, we had you children."
"People change. Since your sister's time, that seed was planted in my heart. Until you were born and I watched you grow up, I suddenly felt—"
"Whether it was me suddenly leaving you, or you joining the army in the future to fight Abominations and hover on the edge of death... it would all be unfair and cruel to you."
"On the night of your sixth birthday, I discussed it with your father, wanting you to choose your own path for the future rather than directly sending you to the Cloud Knights training camp and deciding your life for you."
"But your father was stubborn, always talking about ancestral teachings, and he resolutely disagreed... That was our first argument, and we even came to blows..."
Qiu Zhiyan let out a long sigh, her grip on Qi Zhimu's hand tightening unconsciously.
"I've lost so much since I was a child, and I'm truly afraid of suffering more loss..."
"But I still lost your sister and your father. Although your father was stubborn, old-fashioned, and knew nothing of the ways of the world—having nothing special about him besides his martial skills..."
"But... he was, after all, the beloved person I intended to spend my whole life with..."
"I am a cowardly person. After the battle of Yueque, I used the excuse that I couldn't lose you too to drag you into this cage, trapping you for hundreds of years..."
"I have failed the ancestors of the Qi Family, I have failed your father, and most of all, I have failed you."
"You are a descendant of the Qi Family, and the only one in over ten generations to have grasped a weapon during the Zhua Zhou custom."
"I didn't believe in such things originally, but the talent you showed since childhood forced me to believe that perhaps everything is fate."
"For hundreds of years, no one has ever summoned a member of the Qi Family back to the ranks. Now that you are nearly six hundred years old—past the average discharge age for the Cloud Knights—the General has uncharacteristically come to visit."
"Although General Teng Xiao didn't say it, I can sense that something big is going to happen in the coming years. I can no longer selfishly lock you in this cage."
Having heard so much, Qi Zhimu squeezed his mother's hand in return.
"If one cannot even protect a single home, how can one protect the lights of ten thousand homes?"
"If the price of protecting the lights of ten thousand homes is one's own home, there will always be someone willing to sacrifice for it..."
Tears shimmered in Qiu Zhiyan's eyes, and a look of respect appeared on her face.
"This... is the tacit choice of the Qi Family through the generations... Even though their original intent was unwilling, they still acted without hesitation. They are all reluctant heroes..."
"Lord Zhimu, my selfish side doesn't want you to be a hero, but I also don't want the bravery and loyalty passed down through the Qi Family for two thousand years to be tarnished because of my interference."
Feeling the warmth of his mother's skin against his palm, Qi Zhimu's emotions surged, and he remained silent for a long while.
"...I understand, Mother."
After a moment of silence, Qi Zhimu smiled.
Actually... he had always understood.
But in the end, he was just a mortal.
Even the Xianzhou General, a Lord of the Hunt Envoy and the supreme combat power of the Xianzhou, finds himself powerless in many situations and might even die in a foreign land, let alone someone like him.
He did not have such grand ambitions.
He only wanted to protect his mother and protect his home.
That was all.
Mother... even if you hadn't said it, I was destined to let the bravery and loyalty of the Qi Family be tarnished.
Because... my original intent in choosing to join the army as a child was always just to protect you all, not... the Xianzhou.
If there comes a day in the future when I die on the battlefield, I will likewise be what you called a reluctant hero.