THE ARCHIVES OF HEARTACHE
Monday morning at Sterling Hospital arrived with a heavy, oppressive grey sky. Fay walked through the sterilized halls with her chin held high, her white coat perfectly pressed. To the interns and the nurses, she was the same untouchable Dr. Sterling. But to Nina, something was very, very wrong.
Fay was usually a blur of motion, her eyes always on a chart or a patient. Today, her hands kept drifting to the pocket of her coat. Every five minutes, she would find a corner, pull out her phone, and stare at the screen for a few seconds before shoving it back with a frustrated sigh.
"Doctor? The results for the cardiac bypass are in," Nina said, standing by Fay's desk.
Fay didn't look up immediately. She was hunched over her phone, her thumb rapidly scrolling. "Put them on the desk, Nina. I'll get to them."
"Is everything okay? You've checked your phone fourteen times since 8:00 AM," Nina noted, her voice cautious.
"I am waiting for nothing," Fay snapped. "Go back to your station."
As soon as Nina left, Fay's fingers moved on their own. She went back to Sofia profile. She began to scroll past the recent beach photos, digging deep into the archives. She wasn't looking for business milestones anymore, she was looking for the years she had lost.
And then, she found a series of "Throwback" posts.
The Teenage Years: A photo of kei and Sofia watching movies and tv series together in Sofia room.
The Picnic: A photo from ten years ago the very summer everything changed. It wasn't at an airport. They were in a lush, green park right here in the city. Sofia had set up an elaborate spread of fruit and sandwiches. In the photo, Sofia was feeding a grape to a glowing, happy Kei.
The caption read:"Even when the world feels like it's falling apart, we have our quiet Sundays."
The Sweet Moments: A collection of candid shots Kei sleeping on Sofia's lap in Sofia room, Sofia braiding Kei's hair, and the two of them playing in the arcade.
Fay felt the air leave her lungs. She realized now that when Kei had "disappeared" from her life ten years ago, she hadn't left the country. She had stayed. She had been right here, building a life, finding comfort and being cherished by Sofia while Fay was drowning in her own bitterness.
The jealousy was no longer a spark, it was a forest fire. Fay stared at the picnic photo. She remembered that Sunday. She remembered waiting for a call that never came, while only miles away, Sofia was making Kei laugh under a willow tree.
"You were there the whole time," Fay whispered, her eyes burning. "You were the one who held her when I couldn't. You were the one who saw her grow up."
"Doctor? The Chief of Surgery is waiting," Nina called out, tapping on the door.
Fay jumped, nearly dropping her phone. She stood up too quickly, her face a mask of cold fury.
"I'm coming," Fay snapped.
As she walked past, Nina caught a glimpse of the phone screen. She saw the young Kei and Sofia sharing a picnic blanket. Nina bit her lip. She knew that look. It wasn't the look of someone who hated an ex; it was the look of someone realizing they had missed an entire lifetime of "sweet moments" because they were too proud to look for them.
Fay marched down the hallway, her heels clicking like a countdown. She tried to tell herself she was fine. But every time she closed her eyes, she saw Sofia feeding Kei that grape a moment of tenderness that should have been hers.