Chapter - 56화 (56/150)
"Hyung! Gilseong hyung!"
Dansol clung to the phone that sounded like it might cut out any second, sobbing uncontrollably. With no way to even confirm whether the members were alive, the constant sirens were enough to send him into a panic.
—Hyung! Joo Dansol!
"Huh... huh? Woo Hyun? Woo Hyun, are you okay? Are the others okay too?"
—Uh... we're all okay. We're only a little hurt. So don't come.
"What are you talking about...! You're hurt! How can I—!"
To Dansol, who wanted to bolt out the door immediately, Woo Hyun snapped at him not to come. Dansol sank down, overwhelmed with misery, wanting to cry like a child.
What if, because he'd regressed and changed fate, the members got into the car accident in his place?
Dansol remembered the pain of his bones shattering into pieces when he'd been hit by that car.
—Hyung has to perform. Do you know what kind of chance this is for us? You're going to bail on it?
"How... how am I supposed to do it alone...! Woo Hyun, but really—are the others all okay?"
—They're fine. So you perform, even if you're alone.
"I can't do it alone..."
—If hyung does well, next time we'll all stand as mains. How long are we going to be background filler for other people?
"...Woo Hyun... hey... I'm sorry."
—Ha... hyung. Do you want to run away again?
At Dansol's sudden apology, disappointment filled Woo Hyun's voice. Dansol hurriedly spat out everything he wanted to say like a rapper. The makeup team had been waiting endlessly while he stayed on the call—he couldn't drag it out any longer.
"It's not that... yesterday... and the day before... I said harsh things, and I didn't answer calls... I didn't even know you were looking for me and couldn't practice because of it, and I still yelled at you—I'm really sorry. I should've apologized first thing...."
From what he'd heard from Gilseong, it sounded like the CEO sending the members out for his personal errands wasn't a one-time thing.
Dansol felt ashamed for thinking he was the only one suffering all this time.
Yoo Dohyeon had been right. That sickness where you mistake it for you alone struggling, even though the others are fighting in their own ways.
Dansol had been deep in K-failed-idol syndrome.
"I think I convinced myself I was the only one suffering. I'm sorry for that too... I'll try... I don't know if you'll accept it... but if it's okay even if I'm alone, I'll do well. So don't worry, and come up safely."
—What is that supposed to mean—come fast or come safe?
"Just come fast and safe!"
—Ugh... fine. I have to go now. Hanging up.
"Yeah... hey... the others really are all okay?"
—I said they're fine. Don't worry, hyung. Only worry about yourself. Don't cry.
"Okay..."
Dansol wiped his tears with his sleeve. The makeup artist who'd been waiting asked with a worried face.
"Dansol, are you okay? Your members got into a car accident?"
"Yes... I... they can't make it... but I still want to go on stage even if I'm alone... who do I talk to about that?"
"Knock knock. Joo Dansol's manager."
While Dansol anxiously waited for the opening ceremony organizers' decision, Jisu and Daesu showed up at his waiting room, both hands loaded with lunchboxes.
The waiting room, which was supposed to be shared by eight members, was empty and made Dansol feel even more alone—but with Jisu and Daesu here, he couldn't hide how shaken he was.
"I heard. After it's over, hyung will take you. We'll go to the hospital together."
"Hyung, aren't you busy...?"
"No, not at all. I'm not as popular as you think."
"I'm not busy either."
If timid Dansol knew that the agency CEO, a magazine editor-in-chief, advertisers, and even a famous overseas director were all waiting—because Jisu and Daesu had cleared their schedules just to see him yesterday and today—he might've passed out on the spot.
"So eat this first."
Since yesterday, every time Jisu saw Dansol, he kept feeding him something.
Dansol couldn't taste anything with his mind full of the members, but he didn't know how long he'd have to wait, or whether he'd even be allowed to perform. He had to stay conscious and hold on, so he forced himself to chew down what Jisu handed him.
Daesu watched him, then rummaged through a bag—maybe he'd stopped at a convenience store—and opened a bottle of water for him.
"You two are like a mom and dad."
"Huh?!"
"..."
With his mouth stuffed full, Dansol forced a bright smile.
"When we had school talent shows, I used to envy the kids whose mom and dad came and took care of them. My parents were always busy and couldn't come... but today, you hyungs feel just like that...."
"Aha... yeah...? Haha... if Dansol is happy... then... I... I'm happy too."
Jisu, seeing Dansol's eyes swollen from crying, yanked his lips up into a smile so he wouldn't get hurt. Then he started thinking which of the two was the "mom," when—
"I'm not."
Jisu shot him a look, but Daesu frowned and said what he wanted anyway. Dansol's eyes went wide and he apologized quickly.
"Ah... I'm sorry. That might've sounded bad... I—today I'm just..."
"Not in my heart."
"Huh...?"
Dansol's eyes got even wider, like he'd heard something impossible.
Jisu's face also turned into that same "I just heard something I shouldn't have" expression.
Knock knock.
Right on cue, someone knocked on the suddenly silent waiting room door.
"Dansol, the director said it's better if you go on alone. Can you match paths with Zeus right now?"
"...Yes!"
It seemed the organizers had approved Dansol going on stage alone.
Holding his hanbok so it wouldn't drag on the floor, Dansol hurried out—then turned back like he'd forgotten something.
"Ah... Daesu sunbae-nim. Thank you. That was kind of funny."
Seeing the faint smile on Dansol's face—so different from how gloomy he'd been—Daesu looked satisfied. Jisu still looked confused, like he didn't understand a thing.
"Hey... what was that. I didn't get it. Explain."
"Old man doesn't need to know."
"So is it 'not' or is it 'good'...."
The only reason a stage that could've been canceled wasn't, was because Zeus pushed hard for it.
If the performance changed from a pair choreography to Dansol doing it alone, attention would naturally focus on Dansol—and the "main character" could effectively shift.
But Ma Taeohh and the Zeus members not only strongly recommended that Dansol go solo—they even rewrote the blocking to make him stand out more. It wasn't a decision just anyone could make this close to the opening ceremony.
"Dansol, if you come out from here, we'll surround you in a circle. Then you do the choreography with Taeohh, and exit again to the right."
Dansol focused more than ever, matching movements and memorizing the stage paths at speed.
Even during rehearsal, tears kept threatening to rise when he thought of the members—but he couldn't give up like this.
'If I do well, next time our kids can all stand as mains!'
Even if he died when the time came, this time he didn't want to vanish like he had before—as a failed idol, a walking disaster who only dragged his members down.
By the time he could feel sweat running between the layers of hanbok, rehearsal ended.
For the stage that was only moments away, Dansol put in red lenses that made his gaze look dreamy, and painted his lips red.
The hair team tried on a shimmering silver-white wig and a jet-black ebony wig one after the other, then chose the white one and tied it half-up with a red ribbon.
A wig that looked like it belonged in fantasy suited Dansol like it was his own hair.
"Now I get why scholars get bewitched by a gumiho and hand over their liver and gallbladder."
"Yeah."
Daesu and Jisu said it while watching, but Dansol had his eyes closed, murmuring as he mentally rehearsed the choreography.
"Joo Dansol! Stand by!"
"...Yes!"
How much time passed?
In an instant, the outside noise vanished. Then, as soon as fireworks exploded in the stadium, a staff member came into the waiting room to fetch Dansol.
The staff member flinched when they saw Daesu and Jisu by the door. Jisu smiled like a smooth-talking snake.
"Hello. I'm Joo Dansol's one-day manager today. Please take good care of our kid."
"Uh... yes... I'm... a fan too!"
With Jisu's smile and Daesu's presence making the staff member stiffen up, Dansol hurried out of the waiting room.
"Hyung! I'm going!"
"Yeah. Don't shake."
"Go do well."
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