Daniel let go of Keiko's arm. The silence between them lasted three seconds. An eternity. Then Daniel did what he had learned to do since childhood, when people laughed at his hair or at his parents' accent: he put on the mask.
He opened a wide, carefree smile, even though his eyes didn't follow along.
— Wow, "gentle NPC"? Daniel laughed, forcing lightness into his voice. That's almost a compliment. Could've been "bugged NPC".
— Daniel, Keiko started, worried.
— Relaxa, véi(Brazilian slang meaning "Relax, man"). Daniel slapped his friend on the back, pushing him away from there. Let's go to karaoke. If I'm an NPC, at least I'll be an NPC who sings well.
But as they walked, Daniel's mind was no longer there. The sentence "He prefers 2D girls" had turned a rusty key inside his head, a key that pulled him back in time, to when he was still seventeen and believed that showing who he was wouldn't have consequences.
The smell of roasted coffee invaded his nostrils, replacing the fresh afternoon air. Suddenly, he was no longer at college.
The sound of cups clinking and the smell of coffee filled the air. Daniel, at seventeen, was sitting with Ichigo. Back then, he still hadn't learned how to hide the sparkle in his eyes.
— Ichigo, remember when I told you about that shounen arc? Daniel leaned over the table, gesturing, accidentally spilling a bit of sugar onto it. Naruto was finally accepted by the village. After everything he went through, after being judged, he proved who he was.
He smiled, waiting for her to understand. To him, it wasn't just an anime. It was about being hāfu, about being different and still finding your place.
— It was incredible. I almost cried.
Ichigo stirred her iced coffee with the straw, spinning the ice with the tip of her finger. Her look wasn't angry. It was boredom. A cold boredom.
— Daniel, talk quieter. Everyone is staring.
His smile faltered.
— Oh, sorry. It's just that the story
— Anime again? She sighed, resting her chin on her hand. Ah, Daniel, I wanted to talk about the school festival. About real things. That stuff there, she pointed at his phone with disdain, that's kids' stuff.
— It's not kids' stuff, he tried to defend himself, but his voice came out weak. It has deep themes, like rejection, overcoming.
She cut him off with a condescending smile. The kind of smile you give to a younger sibling who messed up.
— You're seventeen. You should've grown out of this phase by now.
Daniel leaned back in his chair. He wanted to say, "It's not a phase. It's who I am." But he only nodded, swallowing the coffee that suddenly tasted far too bitter.
— You're right. Sorry.
Daniel tried one last time. He had brought the final volume of his favorite manga. Not for her to read everything, just to show her one page. One specific piece of art he thought was beautiful. He thought, "If she sees the art, she'll understand it's not childish scribbles."
They sat on the bench. The wind messed with her hair.
— Ichigo, he began, taking the book out of his backpack carefully, as if it were a relic. Just look at this page. The artist's line work is
Before he could open the book, she placed her hand over the cover, closing it. The dull thud of the book shutting echoed louder than the noise of the courtyard.
— Daniel. Her voice was tired. I don't want to see it.
— But it's just
— Why do you insist on this so much? She looked him straight in the eyes. I'm your girlfriend, but you seem more in love with these paper characters than with me.
He felt his face burn.
— I just wanted to share something that's part of me.
— Then keep that part to yourself, she said sharply. Because I'm tired of dating a child.
It was at that moment, with the weight of her hand over the closed manga, that an invisible door inside him locked shut.
If I show who I am, I get rejected.
Daniel put the manga back into his backpack.
— I understand.
Two days later, the final blow came. They were walking toward the exit. The silence between them was heavy, suffocating. Daniel was quiet. He had stopped talking about anime. Stopped talking about games. Stopped gesturing. He was doing exactly what she asked: being mature. Being quiet.
Ichigo stopped on the sidewalk and turned to him, irritated.
— You're acting weird
— Me? Daniel blinked, confused. I'm just being quiet. I'm not talking about kids' stuff.
— Exactly. She exploded. Now you don't talk about anything. You just agree with me. Smile and nod. You look like a robot.
Daniel put his hands in his pockets, feeling lost.
— I tried being myself, you didn't like it. I try being what you want, and you complain. I don't know how to reach you, Ichigo.
Her eyes filled with frustration.
— The problem, Daniel, is that when you talk about anime, your eyes light up. You have passion. And when you talk to me, she pointed at his face, you're empty. You're just gentle. And I don't want your polite gentleness. I wanted to be loved the way you love those stupid stories.
She took a deep breath, holding back tears.
— It's over. I need a real boyfriend. And you prefer living in your fantasy.
She turned her back and walked away. Daniel didn't run after her. He stood there on the sidewalk, watching her leave, and thought:
I'm not empty. I just locked away everything good I had because you said it was bad.
— Daniel. Daniel.
Keiko's voice burst the memory bubble. Daniel blinked hard. The diploma felt heavy in his hand. The gossiping girls were already gone.
— Let's go? Karaoke's gonna be packed.
Keiko appeared with an excited smile, along with other friends who joined them.
— Let's go to karaoke, cambada(Brazilian slang meaning "gang" or "crew"). Today we're even gonna sing "Unravel" if you ask for it.
Daniel let out a weak laugh.
And so, walking out of college, fate decided to play its first trick of the day.
— Speaking of that, I watched the anime you recommended, Daniel. Caraca(Brazilian expression meaning "Wow"), what a masterpiece. The opening is addictive. I was singing it all day.
— I told you. That intro with the chorus hitting is perfect.
— And that scene in episode three, mano(Brazilian slang meaning "man" or "dude"), it gives you chills.
In the east corridor.
When he turned quickly.
He crossed paths with Hana.
Books pressed to her chest. Eyes down. Hair tied back. Silent.
He passed so close they almost bumped into each other. The scent of old paper brushed against him.
But neither of them noticed.