It's really happening . The Awakening. I get to unlock my mana. I wonder if I'm a water mage? Rena did spend a lot of time in the stream? Or an earth mage, we do have that nature spirit image.
I stood in front of the tall bookshelf located in my bedroom and scanned the titles. There were dozens of grimoires, historical texts, spell theory guides—all lined up in immaculate rows. And there, nestled among them, were her books. My mother's. The covers were worn, but the spines had been carefully restored. He had them fixed. I traced my finger across one, the familiar texture making something in my chest ache. One in particular stood out—her favorite. She used to read it to me like a fairytale. Back then, I didn't understand it was actually a low-level mana theory book. I pulled it off the shelf and sat on the balcony. A note resting on top: HAPPY BIRTHDAY. A DAY THAT I UNFORTUNATELY MISSED. A DAY THAT WILL FOREVER BE CELEBRATED. flipping through the pages a smile tugs at me, trying to settle my nerves; Why can't I just enjoy this precious gift? Doubt continues to enter my mind.
What if mother was wrong? What if I don't have mana at all? She never had me tested. I don't think I showed signs. We didn't know anyone to check to see if I did.
The fear crawled in, slow and steady. I took a deep breath and tried to shake it off. This wasn't the time for doubt. She believed in me—they both believed in me now. I believe in me—us. Eventually, a knock on the door startled me from the page. My father had entered.
Breathe in. Deep intake slow outtake. Don't let uncertain emotions rattle my thoughts.
"Let's go," he said simply.
We walked in silence down an unfamiliar hallway. The deeper we went, the more the air changed—thicker, humming with power. Strange glyphs glowed faintly on the walls, their meaning lost to time but still alive with purpose. He stopped in front of a door marked with layered runes. With one firm push, it opened—and what lay inside stole my breath. The room was round, ancient, and sacred. In each corner stood carefully stacked stones in patterned formations, their shapes precise and full of meaning. The centerpiece of it all was a massive white crystal, glowing with a rainbow shimmer—like it held every color of magic in one pulse.
In front of the crystal was a raised platform, paved with gemstones: ruby, emerald, tanzanite, black opal, alexandrite… all arranged in concentric rings, humming with energy.
"Scared?" my father asked, smirking as he hung his jacket neatly by the door.
Maybe….. Extremely nervous ….Will this hurt?
I didn't answer. I was too busy staring. This room felt like something out of a wizard's temple. Powerful. Beautiful. Terrifying.
I begin to take slow deep breaths through my mouth to calm these now creeping nerves and anxiousness. He walked over and placed a kiss on top of my head, sensing my nerves. "I almost died when I awakened," he muttered, like a confession meant to distract me.
"What?! How? Why?!" I fired the questions off so fast, I nearly tripped over them.
Mana awakening is risky but to almost die. Like face death in the face… life hanging on by a string. Should I back out now? I am not pumped to be killed another time. Plus two days here and I already got us both killed.
I take a few more deep breaths, careful not to alert him of my nerves.
He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "My father was gone most of the time. And my mother… Well, she didn't have access to family funds without permission. me and her weren't on good terms…Some families will show their true dark color when a prize they want is given away." His face was expressionless, but his eyes had drifted somewhere else. Far away.
"I jumped off a cliff to awaken my mana, it was a desperate time." he said after a pause thinking back about that dangerous moment.
I blinked. "You—what?!"
"Some commoners will experience a near death or;force the body into a life-or-death situation to trigger a response. Your last chance to live. It's… suicidal, really when you say it out loud. But that was my only option. You have better odds with mages for safety reasons, but I didn't have one yet."
He hesitated again. "I didn't want to risk that for you. I don't want that for you. I know this speech is a little late, but… I hope it helps."
What pushed him far enough to risk his life? And I hope those family members that tried to hurt him don't come around any more.
He chuckled awkwardly at himself, and I couldn't help but laugh too. It worked. My fear loosened, just a little. Then he straightened his posture and walked toward the platform.
"Sit," he said, voice more serious now.
I stepped onto the gemstone platform and sat cross-legged. He knelt across from me and gently took my hands into his.
"I'm just going to give you a little shock," he said. "It's enough to wake up the mana that's been sleeping in you. Your mana is going to then take over. Nothing threatening to your mana system so this should be simple.
This is truly happening! Rena do you see this? Can you feel this moment? My nerves?
At first, it was warm. Like liquid sunlight moving from his fingertips into mine, slowly spreading up my arms. But then… it burned.
He said it was a little shock…... Not a wave of painful heat.
The heat grew fast—too fast. My chest seized. My body locked up. My skin felt like it was boiling, my heartbeat crashed like drums, and a high-pitched ring screamed in my ears. I couldn't breathe.
"It hurts!" I cried out, tears spilling down my face—only to evaporate instantly from the heat rolling off my skin. I squeezed my eyes shut. Maybe that would dull the pain. Maybe if I—Suddenly, my father's voice cut through the chaos—panicked and low.
Breath deep in. Slow out.
"Why does your mother always have to be right?" he whispered, more to himself than to me.
The fear in his voice made my own multiply. He was scared. That terrified me. He lets go of my hands, quickly bringing both of his palms to either side of my face, anchoring me as my body trembles beneath the weight of heat and fear.
It feels as if lava is burning my flesh, peeling it back like an orange.
"Let me guide your mana," he says, panic bleeding through his calm mask. "You need to give me control Rena"
breathe deep. Slow out….. What did he ask? I barely hear him.
My eyes shoot open, but a curtain of tears blurs everything. The pressure in my chest rises. The ringing in my ears pulses louder—louder—until it matches the pounding of my heartbeat. The two sounds sync in perfect rhythm, rising like a chorus inside me.
Breath-. I'm going to die…. Again…..
Guide? Mana? Me? Am I hearing things?
"Let me guide your mana…"
Dad?
His voice repeats, like an echo bouncing through a tunnel. Over and over. Until everything else vanishes. Just one long, soft tone remains. A hum. Gentle, eerie. Then—cool. My body, once burning like fire, starts to settle. The air against my skin feels like silk after a storm. My arms feel weightless, my breath begins to return in shallow gasps. When my vision clears, I lock eyes with my father. His face is tight, trembling slightly. Not with fear—something else. Sadness?
No… not sadness. It's something deeper. Brokenness.
His eyes are wet with it. His mouth opens to speak but no words come out. And then— My body goes limp. I collapsed into his arms. His warmth is the last thing I feel. The ringing fades. I hear his voice again—but now it sounds distant, muffled, like he's shouting from underwater.
"Physician! Now! Get a mage in here! Immediately!" he roars. "Bring Gabriel immediately."
"Sorry" I wept weakly out of breath.
"Oh my child. You have nothing to apologize for." He whispered barely audibly.
What did he say? I wish I would stop drifting in and out.
The room vibrates. I feel the stone floor tremble beneath the platform. Magic pulses—uncontrolled, unstable, wild. And I fade away completely, swallowed by darkness, held in my father's arms as my newly awakened mana flares for the very first time. My thoughts drift off:
Ring. Ring.
Joleen groans and grabs her phone from the nightstand, barely opening her eyes. The glow of the screen blinds her.
Unknown Number.
She hesitates, thumb hovering over "Decline."
But something—instinct, guilt, desperation—makes her swipe "Answer."
"Hello?"
"Hey, Joleen? It's Kendra from work. Listen—I know it's your day off, but we're swamped. Mia called out again. Can you come in? Just for a few hours? You'll be working with Ethan."
Joleen sits up slowly, rubbing her temples. Grumbling at her slight irritation, wanting to be alone in her room. Shades down, room dark with her under the covers.
"Today?" she asks, her voice scratchy. "I had plans."
"I wouldn't ask unless we really needed you. Just until the afternoon rush passes."
Joleen sighs and stares at the ceiling. Debating with herself.
"Fine. I'll be there in an hour."
"Thank you! You're a lifesaver."
Click.
Was that a dream?Why is it playing back like a movie?
Then again when I had gained Rena's memories they also felt like a movie. It also felt like I was a part of it. Like they were also mine, and not in a possession type of way.
My mind drifts back off against my best to fight. The dream shifts—water rippling.
Now I am Rena again. Younger, about seven.Kneeling in the stream, sunlight dappling across her arms. Her mother is beside her, sleeves rolled, holding her hands in the water like it's sacred.
"Close your eyes," her mother says softly. "Feel the current. It's like your mana."
Rena's eyes flutter shut. She hears birdsong. The whisper of the stream.
"I don't feel anything," she pouts.
Her mother chuckles, brushing a damp strand of hair from Rena's forehead.
"That's because you're looking with your eyes. Mana isn't sight, it's life. It's your blood. Your soul. It's the breath in your lungs and the spark in your spirit. It's always there—just quiet."
Beep. Beep. Switch—
The crosswalk chirps. Joleen stands at the corner, coffee in hand, watching traffic crawl by. Her bank looms down the street, glass doors glinting in the morning sun. She almost turned around. Almost calls in sick too. But she doesn't. She walks in. Smiles at Ethan. Nods at her manager. Clocked in like always. As if her life doesn't only have minutes left.
The dream fades. Back to the stream. Rena sits on the bank, older now, fifteen. She is sitting in the water, waist-deep, eyes closed in concentration with her mother. A swirl of light gathers around her fingertips—faint, soft, like fireflies.
"I don't have any mana," Rena murmurs bitterly. "If I did, wouldn't it have shown by now?"
Her mother opens her eyes and wades closer. "Some lights take longer to spark. Some flames need wind to grow."
Rena frowns. "That's poetic, but it doesn't help."
Her mother cups her face.
"You are a river that carved a mountain, Rena. Your mana is quiet. But it's there."
Bang. Cracks begin to form out of thin air. Through the cracks colors of the rainbow shine through.
What just happened? Screams.
What's happening? A sharp pain hit me. What happened? The dream with mom? My chest, what is that sharp pain. The strange wetness?
Joleen's body hits the floor. Sound cuts out. Only the alarm wails. Red. Blurred. Heat crawling across her chest. She sees Ethan's horrified guilty face. She tries to scream. Hand reaching for the wound to see if it's real?
No breath comes.
Why am I seeing this? Why am I reliving this? Hers? Mine? Our memories.
Why does it feel like I am reliving my murder at the bank? I collapse to the ground. Screams erupt everywhere. And the robber frustratedly starts shooting randomly. It's hard to breathe….. I still feel the bullet.
Back in the stream again, Rena is underwater now. Her limbs feel heavy. She stares up at the sun cutting through the surface. Her mother reaches down, hands glowing. Like a shadowy figure.
"Reach for me," her mother says. "Let it in. Let it flow."
Rena stretches her arm up. Light blooms in her chest like a sun waking up.
Joleen is dying. But she's smiling now.Because something soft is taking her away.
A wind, a stream, a heartbeat. Her soul stretches thin… and then reforms.
I gasp. Still feeling slightly asleep. But my body rises slightly from the gemstone platform as magic circles flare beneath me—white light bending, pulsing, responding.
Did I just die? Did our life flash before us?
The room vibrates, my father grips the crystal beside me with one hand, eyes wide as raw magic licks at the edges of his coat. I start to slowly doze back off. And inside the stream of my dreams, I hear our mother's voice one last time:
"Mana is life. But it's also a memory. And yours… is just beginning." The water is still.
Sunlight dances on the surface, and the leaves above filter the light into gold and emerald. The breeze is soft. Familiar. And sitting across from me in the stream, the real Rena half-submerged, I was on the other side, old me: Joleen.
Her reflection in the water doesn't ripple. Her clothes are soaked but glowing faintly, like something not quite solid. Her eyes, though, are real. Heavy. Burdened. With a secret only she knows.
"…It's not fair," I said finally, picking at a petal floating past. "I didn't get to say goodbye. I didn't even know that day would be my last. There were still things I should've done. Just when my life was starting to get back on track."I mumbled.
I wanted to make up with my dad. Maybe get back into chemistry like he wanted, what we bonded over. There are still things I haven't been able to do yet.
Rena watches me quietly. Then leans back on her palms, sighing. "I would probably be able to relate more if I ever left the cabin," she replies. "I've only ever known the cabin. The woods. My mother. I truly know nothing outside of that. So don't talk to me about something unfair." She says it with a grin, not malice. "You think I got to choose any of this either?"
I stare at her, then laugh weakly. "No. I guess you didn't."
"Yet here we finally are." She looks down at her hands and smiles. "Do you believe in descendents and reincarnations?"
Did she just say 'finally?'
"I don't think it's completely far-fetched," I replied.
Besides, look at the situation I'm in. A new world? A new body? This sounds like reincarnation to me….. what does she mean by finally? Am I overthinking it?
We sit in silence, both letting the stream flow around us. It glimmers with traces of light. Mana or memory — maybe both.
"Is it… okay?" I asked gently. "That I'm… here? In your life? Is it okay to be around your dad? When you haven't even got a chance to know him?
I'll be hurt if I was a long lost daughter who returns just to find someone else playing daughter with my dad.
Rena looks at me, her eyes warm and amused. "What life?" she teases. "I lived in one room for twenty three years. I had one person. One creek. One goal: wait and hope something sparks, your spark. I lived, Joleen. I really did. I experienced a freedom very little will experience but with that came isolation and poverty. I loved my mother and she loved me. She loved us. Do I often dislike her choice? Yes. But I understood and respected it. We'll have a happier future" she smiled. " Besides, I'll know him through you. I am happy that you're here."
What was the choice? To up and disappear? Should I ask?.... She says she is okay with our situation.
I swallowed the lump in my throat. "But what do you want me to do with this? This second chance—your body—your world? That weird crypt sweet speech"
Rena stands up slowly, water dripping from her fingertips as she reaches for my hand.
"We're one in the same. My life is yours. Yours is mine. Whatever you do… we'll live it together. Whatever you learn we'll discover together.You choose the path: adventure, knowledge, travel, lounge, a healer, a creator,even romance. I honestly don't mind if you want to become a villainess" She laughed and so did I.
Any path I decide to take? Whatever I decide to do, she'll be okay with it. Well that limits my options.
I blinked. The words echo around me hollow and heavy. There's warmth in Rena's eyes… but something in the air shifts. The reflection in the stream distorts—My face in the water has Rena's eyes. Or maybe it's the other way around. A strange feeling crawls up my spine—a quiet, eerie knowing. I don't pull away. But I wondered, suddenly, who's really in control. She starts to fade. " I'm with all that fu n stuff .Except romance, "I yelled. She's gone.
Romance makes my brain meltdown. Then again dad always wanted me to get married…. Preferably to his 'young' co-worker who works with him to create new medicine.
A wet cloth presses against my forehead. The hum of a low conversation buzzes behind my ears. The world returns in waves: heat, pressure, the weight of my limbs like they're filled with stones. My throat is dry. My eyes ache. I try to shift and feel my body protest.
"She's awake," a voice says gently.
I forced my eyes open. My father, sitting beside me, worries etched deep into his expression. His eyes are red-rimmed, and his coat is wrinkled like he hasn't left the room in hours. Maybe longer. My vision is hazy, but I see the way his hand shakes as he brushes hair from my damp forehead.
"Hey," he says softly. "Don't move too fast. Your body's recovering."
I swallowed and felt the heat still lingering beneath my skin. And I looked up at him—his tired eyes, his shaking hands—and for a moment, the fear fades. But that feeling from the dream still lingers.
We are one in the same. One and the same? Is she saying we're the same person?
Whose life was I really living? Mine or hers.The room was dim and warm, lit only by the soft amber glow of enchanted lanterns. I stirred, slowly returning to consciousness. My limbs felt heavy—my skin slick with sweat and my breath shallow. The memories from the awakening flickered behind my eyes like flames.
My father sat beside me, elbows on his knees, hands clasped, his brows knitted in concern. At the sound of me stirring, his head snapped up.
"Rena," he said, standing quickly, "it's great to see you're awake."
I tried to speak, but my voice came out as a dry rasp. Another figure approached the bedside. A tall man with rust-colored hair tied back neatly at the base of his neck. His robes were a smooth slate-gray, embroidered with shimmering green and silver sigils. A golden purple crest was pinned near his collar—my father's sigil.
That sigil is posted damn near everywhere at this estate.
"I'm glad to see your eyes open," the man said gently. "You gave us all a scare."
"Gabriel," my father said, glancing between them. "He's the family's personal physician, as well as a highly trained healing mage. "
Gabriel offered me a respectful nod. "I've served the Duke since before you were born. And I've never seen him look as rattled as he did an hour ago…. Well other than your mother"
I blinked slowly, my body still heavy with exhaustion.
Gabriel held out a silver cup. "Water, laced with a light stabilizing tincture. It'll help your mana settle."
I took it with trembling fingers and drank. It tasted faintly of herbs and minerals, like spring water running over stone.
"You're strong," Gabriel said, observing me carefully. "And lucky. Most who endure what you just went through would still be unconscious—or worse. That mana surge could've ripped you to pieces"
I tried to sit up, but my father gently pressed my shoulder.
"Easy," he said. "Let him explain."
Gabriel folded his hands behind his back, stepping into the soft light. "Your mana," he began, "is... extraordinary. Dense, like your father's. But raw—untouched, unshaped. It's been dormant your whole life, buried beneath instinct and survival. That forest kept you alive—but it also starved your magic. So when your father introduced his mana into your system, it triggered a defensive response..which usually occurs during a awakening but not as intense"
I almost died again.
He looked at me seriously.
"Your body didn't know it was him. All it knew was: something powerful was breaking in. So your mana reacted… violently. It saw him as a threat. Understandable since it knows nothing else."
My eyes widened slightly. "But… he's my father."
Gabriel gave a faint smile. "Magic doesn't care about bloodlines. Only familiarity. And your mana has never felt another's touch before." he laughs sheepishly. " You have virgin mana. Raw, unkept and strong like nature."
My father shifted uncomfortably, guilt flickering behind his stern features.
"It was supposed to be gentle," he muttered. "I didn't realize how intense the response would be."
I hope he's not feeling guilty….. He has nothing to feel guilty about how he was supposed to know that was going to happen. It's not your fault so don't put yourself down…. Wipe the frown off your face please...
Gabriel nodded. "You did what you thought was best. And it worked… barely. Let's be honest if it was a regular mage or even me. Her mana would have ripped them to pieces .Your average will suffer from mana poisoning."
My breath trembled. "So what now?"
Gabriel stepped forward, his tone calm but firm. "Now, we take it slow. You rest. For at least three days. No spells. No channeling. No runework. You've survived the floodgate opening—but your control is nonexistent. If you try anything right now, you could shatter yourself from the inside or someone else. Your mana is like a new born fragile yet also unstable like a sink hole ready to collapse."
My father's hand tightened on mine.
Gabriel continued, "After that, I'll begin your training. Personally. It's not safe to let someone with your mana level walk into Acreon untrained. You'd draw attention. Dangerous attention."
I met his gaze. "Why help me?"
Gabriel smiled. "Because I work for your father. And I also know your mother, we all went to Acreon." I exhaled softly, eyelids already growing heavy again.
The conversation faded into quiet as sleep pulled at me once more. But Gabriel's final words lingered in my ears, even as my mind slipped into dreams: "Your magic is powerful, Rena. But power without mastery is a blade without a hilt. Let's make sure you can hold it." The room fell quiet as Gabriel gave a respectful bow and stepped out, the soft click of the door echoing in the silence he left behind.
Does everyone here talk in riddles?
Now it was just me and my father. He sat back down beside me, rubbing his hand over his face. I could tell he hadn't slept—not really. Not while I was unconscious. His jaw tensed, eyes lingering somewhere distant, as if replaying something in his mind.
"When your mother mentioned your mana… 'like father,'" he said suddenly, trying to laugh, but it didn't land. The bitterness laced in his voice was hard to ignore. "Raw. Dense. Powerful. Destructive. Just like me…" He shook his head.
"Did she know from the beginning? Is that why she left? Did she see this coming? The danger?" His words tumbled out, low and weary, no longer directed at me, but at the ghosts only he could see.
I wanted to say something, to try to answer his questions, to tell him I didn't blame her or him—but my body was still too weak, and sleep was clawing at the edges of my mind. My eyes shut, but my ears stayed open just a bit longer.
But I wonder the same things as you. What was her plan? Is this all fate?
"I'll burn this nation down before I let them use you," he muttered, voice sharp with quiet fury. "As a tool… or worse."
I slipped fully into sleep, his words echoing in my mind like a protective oath wrapped in fire.