I sat across from Xenovia and Irina in the living room, my hands in my lap. My wounds were fully healed by Asia out of sight of the Exorcists and I had changed into a new set of clothes as speaking in my old tattered ones would be awkward as Hell. I also made sure to tell Asia, Ravel, and Isabela to hide upstairs and prepare to escape in case things went south and a fight broke out. I specifically told Isabela that her first priority was making sure Asia and Ravel got out safely.
I had tea made and set in front of us, but neither of them took it.
We just sat there… all silent-like.
"Soooo… How's it goin?" I asked, trying to alleviate the tension in the room.
"Hahahahahaha!" Irina hunched over laughing. Did… Did I say something funny? "I missed that! Ru-chan, you always had the most adorable habit of saying something so random and silly in awkward silences!" She's right. It's what I've always done, it's what I always would do.
"I'm honestly surprised you remembered that?" I said, gripping my hands together tightly. I blushed, turning away. "I was pretty sure you had completely forgotten about me."
"What? How could I forget you!?" Irina asked, almost sounding offended. "Next I bet you'll be accusing me of forgetting our promise too!" Pause. "YOU didn't forget, did you?" She held up her pinky, reminding me that we had pinky swore on it.
"No no no!" I raised my hands in surrender. Then I smiled, raising my own pinky. "Never."
I remembered our promise after so long. It was so long ago, but it was the final promise we made to each other before Iri left. It was the one reason I never lost hope in us all because of that promise.
Xenovia eyed me with an odd look on her face.
We ended up in another silence, made awkward only once Irina and I realized we were staring at one another for a long time. We both turned away, blushing.
"Soooo… I see you became an Exorcist." I said, trying again to rid us of the awkward silence.
"Yes." Irina admitted, swinging her legs a little due to her awkward state. "Soooo… I see you became a Devil."
I nodded, rubbing the back of my neck. "Yep. I'm the Queen of the Maou, Serafall Leviathan-sama."
That was when I saw both Exorcists' eyes go wide.
"Xenovia."
"Hm?"
"Stopping you from killing him was the best decision I ever made." Irina said, her face paling.
"I second that." I said with a big, goofy grin.
Xenovia glared. "Enough games. Tell us what you were doing in the park." Xenovia commanded. She not so subtly brushed against the cloth of her hidden Excalibur. "If you cannot answer my questions, I may have to rethink my decision to spare your life."
I narrowed my eyes at her. "How cute. You think I feel threatened by you." I was threatened by her, but that was more in a physical sense rather than an emotional one.
"Both of you please calm down!" Irina pleaded, stepping between us when we got out of our seats, ready to fight. Xenovia and I glared at one another, but we relented. Xenovia and I returned to our respective seats, but we continued glaring at one another. Then Irina turned to me and smiled. "Sorry about that. Um… Ru-chan, not to be rude, but what WERE you doing?"
"I was…" I hesitated. Even if Irina was my childhood love, her and Xenovia's appearances around the same time Freed showed up with his own Excalibur was way too convenient to be coincidence. "I was doing something for a friend. We were looking for something. In order to help my friend, I had to find something that caused them much pain."
"You mentioned Freed Sellzen before." Xenovia noted. "Why is that? And why would you assume we were allied with that Stray?"
"Why would YOU assume I had whatever it is you were looking for?" I questioned her back. "That's right. I can do an interrogation too. If I answer your questions, you also have to answer mine."
Xenovia nodded. "Even if it is with a Devil, it is a fair exchange."
Satisfied, I decided to respond to her questions. "I thought you were working with Freed because… he attacked me and my friend last night." Irina gasped and Xenovia crossed her arms, having a thinking expression on her face. "When he fought us, he had a really strong Holy Sword… he called it 'Excalibur'."
The atmosphere in the room turned ice cold. Irina and Xenovia stared at me with deathly serious eyes.
"Where did you encounter him?"
"Did you notice anything strange about his Excalibur?"
"Where do you think he was heading after the fight?"
They bombarded me with question after question and the conversation began feeling horribly one-sided.
I raised my hands, trying to calm them down. "Ok. Let's do this one at a time. I encountered him in the residential area. I was too busy trying not to die to thoroughly inspect the sword he was trying to stab me with. I don't know where he was heading after the fight because it was raining and he used a smokescreen to escape, any track he left behind being long gone by now. I don't know who he's answering to, but I would assume you do." I took a breath.
"I see. So it appears they've managed to get someone who can properly wield the Excalibur."
"This is just as bad as we thought," Irina agreed. She then turned to me. "Even if you have become a Devil, I am very happy you're alright, Ruto."
I felt my heart flutter and my face turn a deep red color. Knowing Irina still cared about me made me really happy.
"... Er… yeah." I coughed once. "Anyway, why are you two here? You mentioned you were looking for something. What was it? And why do you have a sword you're also calling Excalibur?"
"This information pertains to our mission. We have an audience with Rias Gremory tomorrow to explain it and you are free to hear your answers then." In other words, you aren't going to tell me anything. Xenovia took a deep breath. "It's hard to believe that this is the son of the legendary Shana-sama."
"Hey, you—!" I was about to spit back something scathing when I processed what she said. "Shana-sama'?"
"Are you sure you're not mistaken, Irina?" Xenovia asked her partner.
Irina nodded excitedly. "Yeah! I was really surprised, too! When I saw a picture of Ruto's Oka-san, I was really surprised, but there was no mistaking the resemblance! I saw her outside lots of times, playing with Ruto before we all became friends! It is without a doubt the same Uzumaki Shana-sama!"
"Wait wait wait!" I spoke loudly to silence them. "'Shana-sama'? How do you know Oka-sama's first name?!" Even to Irina, I never spoke Oka-sama's first name. How did they know it?
Irina and Xenovia looked at one another, surprised. Then Irina turned to me.
"You really don't know, Ru-chan?" She sounded so shocked, as if I had said something heretical. "I mean… I figured you would know something like this!"
"No. Know what?" I was tired of answering and never being answered.
"That… that you're Oka-san was formerly the strongest Exorcist!"
The whole world around me froze. As if those words stopped the world from spinning, literally stopping time.
"W-What?" Was all I could say.
Irina frowned. "You really didn't know? You were her son, so I thought you would have found out after a while. Mito-nee knew. She's older than you and has been around your Oka-san much longer."
I heard her words, but I could only process the sound of my own heartbeat.
"Oka-sama… was an Exorcist?"
Xenovia shook her head. "Not AN Exorcist. THE strongest Exorcist. The only human woman who could surpass my sword master in terms of strength and skill."
I felt sick…
There was no way that could be true. Oka-sama… Oka-sama was a normal human. She… She could never be someone like those people at the Church… The ones who expelled kindhearted Asia for believing all lives, even Devils, were worth saving or the ones who allowed the Holy Sword Project to take place… No! Oka-sama couldn't have been of the same group!
"She was one of the very best Exorcists to ever serve our God. She was a great asset to us as her children would've been." She narrowed her eyes at me, as if blaming me for dying and becoming a Reincarnated Devil.
I was snapped out of my shock by the sound of the door opening and slamming shut.
"I'm hooooooome!" Mito-nee called out. She came into the living room casually, carrying a bag of groceries. "Haru, I see you…" Mito-new froze when she saw Irina and Xenovia. "Ah. I see we have company." But her smile became glass. She looked so fake.
"Mito-nee! Long time no see!" Irina greeted, ignoring Mito-nee's cold expression.
"A-Ah, Shidou-san. I did not expect to see you." Mito-nee said. "What are you doing here?"
Irina shook her head. "I was just catching up with Ru-chan a little, but it's getting really late now." She and Xenovia stood from their seats, bowing to me and Mito-new. "Thank you for your hospitality, but we had best be leaving."
I walked them to the door, too stunned to do anything else. I opened the door, allowing Xenovia to pass me by. We exchanged one more hateful glance with one another. When Irina came to the door, she stopped looking at me.
"I'm sorry, Ru-chan." She apologized. "I didn't know that you didn't know… You… Your Oka-san was an amazing person. I'm sorry I brought up her memory to you."
Oh yes… I was so shocked that I had been numbed to the returning pain associated with Oka-sama's death.
Irina hugged me tightly. Barely registering that I could control my arms, I returned her hug.
"Even if you've become a Devil, I've really missed you, Ru-chan."
"Irina, come on!" I heard Xenovia shout.
Irina pulled away, still smiling. "Don't worry. I'm sure, if you ask, the Lord will forgive you if you ask for His forgiveness for becoming a Devil! Bye, Ru-chan!" And then Irina was gone too.
"Don't even think about it!" I didn't even have to turn around to be able to tell that Mito-nee had been attempting to sneak out of the room without me noticing her. She froze mid-tip toe and looked at me.
"Heeeeeeeey." She said, waving. She looked like a child who got caught with her hand in the cookie jar. Then she noticed my stone-cold serious look. "I see you've met up with Shidou-san again… That's good."
.
Lll
"We have something we need to talk about. NOW." Without waiting for confirmation, I grabbed Mito-nee by the arm and dragged her into the kitchen. Mito-nee said nothing. "First things first… How did Oka-san die?"
The corners of Mito-nee's mouth tightened. "She died in an accident ten years ago." It sounded so mechanical and horribly rehearsed. I didn't notice it back then because I had thought that Mito-nee was grieving as much as I was.
"What kind of accident?" I wanted to see how far I could go with this.
"She… She was hit by a car." Mito-nee answered immediately.
I raised an eyebrow. "Oh really? Last time, you said she was killed in a mugging."
"I… I mean she was killed after getting hit by a car while running from a mugger." Mito-nee explained with almost no emotion in her voice. "That's what I meant when I said that. That mugger was still responsible for her death."
I felt my heart breaking. I… I gave her the chance to prove it… To prove that everything was still right…
"Mito-nee…" I said, my voice cracking. "That was a lie. I don't remember how Oka-san died. And I know that both what you and I said was complete bullshit."
Mito-nee said nothing.
I took a deep breath, preparing myself mentally as I swung my arms by my side.
I turned towards Mito. "So… WHERE should I start?"I asked rhetorically. "Should I start with the fact that Oka-sama was involved with the Church? The fact she didn't die how you said she did? Or maybe I should start with the fact that YOU'VE LIED TO ME FOR ALMOST TEN YEARS!"
Mito looked away. "Oh, I should get the dishes done!" She quickly ran past me, trying to creep back to her previous, normal personality.
Not letting it go this time, I ran after her, blocking the kitchen entrance as Mito-nee started washing the dishes in the sink.
"So many dirty dishes…"
"Nice try, Mito! But you're not dodging this subject anymore!" I ran up to Mito and grabbed her by the arm, forcing her to look at me. "Tell me the truth!"
Mito-nee lowered her head, hiding her eyes behind her bangs. "There's nothing to tell—"
"DON'T YOU LIE TO ME, DAMMIT!" I screeched. I was just… just so angry. I've learned about so many secrets in the past fifteen minutes than I had in a total of almost ten years. I was about to overload emotionally. "I want to know… Why…? Why did you lie to me all these years about Oka-sama?"
"It was for the best."
I shook my head, breathing in and out in an attempt to keep calm. "No, it most certainly wasn't for the best! Everything that's been happening to me… these nightmares… they all have something to do with Oka-sama, so what is it?" The more I spoke. The more confident I felt about what I was saying. Mito-nee had been lying to me all of my life!
Mito shook her head. "I can't tell you. I don't know anything."
"Bullshit!" I tightened my grip on Mito's arm, not in the mood for this. "Tell me the truth dammit!" My breathing became more and more uncontrolled. "It hurts…" Suddenly I was trembling… I felt tears roll down the sides of my face. "... Every night it hurts. This pain. I keep reliving the same Hell over and over again every night and I don't know what it means! I keep seeing Oka-sama! I keep hearing my own screams, so much pain! And everything that's happening in my life! WHY THE FUCK WON'T YOU TELL ME THE TRUTH!?" I clutched the sides of my head, feeling a powerful pain in my head. I stared at Mito… I couldn't help the tears in my eyes. "What… what's happening to me?"
Unable to take the stress anymore, my legs gave out, causing me to fall to my knees.
Mito looked at me with sad eyes, reaching out a hand. "Ruto—"
"DON'T TOUCH ME, YOU BITCH!" I smacked her hand away. Everything burned. Everything hurts.
Why does everything hurt so badly?! Why am I so angry?!
"Ruto. Go to your room."
What?!
I looked up at Mito. There was no emotion on her face. No anger. No compassion. No kindness. No mercy.
"Room. NOW." Her voice was equally emotionless.
"No!" I shouted defiantly at her. "Not until you give me some goddamned answers!"
"It wasn't a request." Then I felt her place a hand on my head, taking a firm hold and yanking as hard as she could, causing me to yelp in pain. "Go to your room." She was grabbing me by my hair, yanking it and dragging me across the ground despite my struggling and screams of protest, trying to throw punches at her in an attempt to make her let go. I only realized we were going up the stairs because my back and sides kept hitting the edge of each step (painfully if I might add). But Mito still didn't stop. She didn't even give me the chance to try standing up to walk up the stairs.
I winced each time I hit a step. Then the floor evened out and I was being dragged again. I heard a door opening and then there was a feeling of weightlessness as I seemed to fly through an open door, landing with a painful thud. I arched my back, groaning as I recovered from the sudden impact.
"Stay in here for the rest of the night." Mito ordered with incredible authority before slamming the door shut. If I didn't think Mito had been lying to me before, I was positive she was lying to me now. And that whole drastic personality change… it was frightening… I… I…
"Graaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!" I roared before charging at the door. I kicked it before punching it. Then I punched it again. Then again. Then again. I punched it again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and I'm sure it is fairly obvious where that went from there.
I used only my normal human strength, not wanting to break the door. That wasn't my goal. I just needed something to hit.
I tried breathing in and out, but my heart that was beating like a drum at a parade commanded my body to take even more breaths than what I had planned.
It was just so hard to cope. I started hitting my wrists against my head, resisting the urge to use my knuckles, trying to force my head to process or possibly forget everything from today. Trembling, I staggered over to my bed. I couldn't even make it the whole way. I just slowly sank down to my knees before turning my back, sitting against the side of my bed. I buried my face into my hands, sobbing.
So much pain… I felt so much pain inside. I was just so tired and… I wanted to go to sleep… I wanted to go to sleep…