The bad feeling that Haru sensed had come true. It was a catastrophe of untold levels. It may as well have been the end of the world. He wanted nothing more than the world to swallow him up and kill him.
"Eh?! Darling's a pervert?!"
"Oh, yes. We've tried so hard to put him on the right path, but ever since he met that old man in the park so long ago, he's been utterly obsessed with women's breasts! He even dreams of one day being a harem king of all things! I know he may seem like an insufferable lecher at times, Yuma-chan, but please! Set him on the right path!"
Haru didn't dare lift his head up. His entire face from the neck down was scarlet, bangs obscuring his eyes. Damn his mother for subjecting him to this treatment! Was this payback for not being a good son and not working hard in school?! Was this his punishment for being a pervert?! Telling Tamamo about his sinful backstory?! He couldn't help it if he was a hot-blooded man!
This… really is the worst.
"Careful, dear." Gorou Hyoudou, Haru's father, said with a small smile on his face. "If you embarrass Haru-kun any further, he just might die from embarrassment."
That might be preferable. Haru thought in despair. The stare Tamamo gave him was… very painful. And for some reason, he feared for the safety of his crotch. Oh, just let this torture be done with!
"I see… very well then!" Tamamo stood up from her seat, her expression best in fierce determination. "I shall do it!" She pounded her fist into her chest. "I will ensure that darling is purged of such indecent thoughts! After all, it is a wife's duty to tend to his Husband, is it not?"
Haru choked. She WHAT?! What was going on?!
His parents looked at one another, then at Tamamo. "...Yuma-chan." his mother said in a quiet voice. "Are you saying...you want to marry Haru-kun?"
"There is no 'want,' Miki-dono." Tamamo said matter-of-factly as she crossed her arms. "We are already wed."
Yep, she did. She totally just did. So much for normalcy and whatnot. Goodbye, Haru Hyoudou's sanity. It was nice knowing you.
Both his parents were rendered speechless by the startling proclamation. Haru wanted nothing more than to crawl into a hole right now.
Soon, Miki regained her voice as she looked at Tamamo with a very serious look on her face. "Yuma-chan, may we speak in private for a moment?"
"Of course, Miki-dono." Tamamo replied.
The two women then stood up, leaving the room. As they did, Haru found himself staring at Tamamo in worry. No doubt she was going to be torn a new one by his mother. He wasn't sure who he should be worried for more, Tamamo for being on the receiving end of a lengthy scolding or his mother out of fear she might provoke her. His eyes then found themselves glued to his "wife's" swaying hips, which were a mesmerizing sight.
Dear god, those curves were dangerous.
"... I thought you said Amano-san was shy." Gorou said, utterly astounded by the girl's bravery before grinning. "That was not shy, Haru-kun. That is a bold declaration. You sure know how to pick 'em."
Haru laughed nervously, unsure whether or not that was a compliment. He certainly had quite a bit of luck, having a beautiful and sexy girl like that as his apparent wife, yet at the same time he was still scared out of his mind.
"She's a keeper, all right." his father continued. "They don't make girls like that anymore. Heh. Reminds me of Miki-chan back in our school days."
"Eh?! Mom was like Ta—er, Yuma-chan?"
Gorou nodded sagely. "Oh, most definitely. I wasn't really the popular or handsome guy in school. I was just the deadly average guy. Yet, in my second year, I met this girl who's constantly hanging around me. She wasn't the naggy or nosy or forceful kind of girl. Just the kind of girl who seemed to hang around you for no apparent reason and she almost always got her way. Not 'cause she was spoiled or anything, but because unlike other people, she was assertive and bold."
Haru remained quiet as he listened. This was honestly the first time his parents ever talked about when they were his age or how they met. He found himself intrigued and continued to have an open ear.
"Miki-chan was definitely not like most girls. Strange part was, she wasn't one of the popular girls, either. True, she had a small fanbase, but that was because of how good she was at kickboxing. A few girls admired her, and the boys? Hah! They were terrified of her because of how badly she kicked their asses."
"Huh." Haru rested his hand against his palm. "So mom was a go-getter kind of girl?"
Gorou chuckled. "Yep. To be honest, I still don't understand how or why she fell for an average joe like me. Anyway, the point is, Haru. A fine gal like that? That is a girl you will never find anywhere else. Don't lose her, otherwise you might regret it."
Haru didn't think he had to worry about that. If he was being honest, Tamamo seemed like the person that wouldn't let go of him. Then again, they had only just met… which only added to his confusion. He understood the part about her summoning being something like a marriage contract, but was she really happy about that? She was more or less with a guy who was a pervert for a living. Was she honestly okay with that? Surely, she could be with someone better.
More importantly...
His mind raced back to earlier today. Even now, he could not remove the picture of Yuma with pitch-black wings, staring at him with a sinister smile, spear of light in hand and poised to end him right then and there.
"You don't have any magic power from what I can tell. And you don't even have a Sacred Gear. Why does a filthy human like you interest Azazel-sama so much?"
What did she mean by that? What the heck is a Sacred Gear? And what even IS Yuma, anyway? Who the heck is this Azazel guy?
There were far too many questions and too little answers. In all honesty, this situation made him feel as if he were in some kind of light novel.
"HARU-KUN!"
The redhead and his father jumped, whirling around to see Miki rush into the kitchen, clasping her hands on his shoulders with an almost crazed look on her face.
"E-eh?! Mom, what's—"
"MARRY HER!" came the shout that damn near blew his eardrums. "MARRY THAT GIRL RIGHT NOW!"
A second. Two, three, four. Five seconds. Then Haru's brain caught up.
"... eh?"
"THIS GIRL IS A PRECIOUS TREASURE THAT YOU MUST NOT LOSE! DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!" She exclaimed as she shook him gently.
"E-eh?! Eh?!"
Wh-what the hell was his mother talking about?! He saw Tamamo emerging from the hallway, a beaming smile on her face. Gorou laughed. "I take it you passed her 'wife seminar', Yuma-chan?"
"Yes, I have." Tamamo grinned. "Please take care of me, otou-sama."
Haru's jaw dropped. He would say, what the hell, but he had a feeling that would become rather old real quick along with "eh." By now, sanity probably understood that it was useless and he should just accept it.
Instead, he did the smartest thing. He promptly groaned.
Today really was weird.