If we're talking about seniority, Li Yuan is Li Xiaozong's cousin. However, while the aristocratic families appear to have a strict hierarchy and clear system, they are actually incredibly chaotic internally. When the patriarch of the Li family was nearly eighty years old, he married a beautiful fourteen-year-old girl. Two years later, this young woman gave birth to a son. Not only did others not believe it, but even the patriarch himself didn't believe it, so he performed a blood test to determine paternity. If the child wasn't his, not only the child, but even the mother would likely be drowned in the river.
The strange thing is, after the blood test, the child was indeed his. The patriarch was overjoyed and held a three-day banquet. This incident, besides proving the patriarch's vigor and vitality, only proved how incredibly chaotic this aristocratic family was. The patriarch was Li Yuan's father, the grandfather of General Li Yuanshan of the Right Valiant Guard, the great-grandfather of Li Xiaozong, the border general, and Li Yuan's great-great-grandfather.
The patriarch of the Li family was over ninety years old. The teenager, though of the generation of Li Yuan's great-grandfather, had no status due to being born out of wedlock. The three-day banquet was less a celebration of his birth and more a celebration of the patriarch's undiminished virility.
But for some reason, the child looked remarkably like his eldest nephew…
Li Xiaozong was also born out of wedlock, so even with a fifth-rank military officer position, he had no real status within the Li family compound.
Li Yuan was Li Luan's grandson, though not the eldest grandson of the main branch.
The Li family was already dominant in Longxi County, so Li Yuan's arrogance was understandable. The Li family of Xiangcheng was a powerful force throughout the entire Sui Dynasty.
At the foot of Mushan Mountain, Fang Jie had specifically instructed Daquan to drive the carriage far from Hongxiuzhao's camp and had Mu Xiaoyao spend the night there. Mu Xiaoyao's first question was, "Fang Jie, what heinous thing are you planning to do now?" Fang Jie solemnly declared that he was acting on behalf of Heaven, but Mu Xiaoyao insisted that this was a novel experience and she couldn't leave; she had to stay and see.
Since Mu Xiaoyao insisted on staying, neither Fang Jie nor Da Quan could object.
So, while Mu Xiaoyao remained asleep in the carriage, Da Quan reluctantly squatted to one side, preparing to skin the hunted roe deer. He rarely did this himself, even though he was a carnivore. Whenever Fang Jie asked him to do it, he would always say something like "a gentleman keeps away from the kitchen," but he never acted like a gentleman.
He loved meat, but he would never cook unless absolutely necessary.
Fang Jie had tried to probe whether this seemingly pointless insistence hid some secret, but to no avail.
Therefore, when Fang Jie returned to the carriage with Li Yuan, Cui Lueshang, and the others, Da Quan was still agonizing over the several dead wild animals. Before him sat an iron pot, the water already boiling, but the pheasant remained motionless to one side, and two deer hung from a nearby tree branch.
When Fang Jie returned and saw this, he feigned anger, uttered a few curses, and then smiled apologetically, asking Li Yuan and the others to wait a moment. He would personally pluck and skin the game. Li Yuan and the others would never interfere with such crude work; in fact, watching Fang Jie deftly and skillfully toss the pheasant into the boiling water to scald its feathers, and then skin a deer with a sharp blade, everyone's eyes revealed a strong sense of disdain and contempt.
A gentleman keeps away from the kitchen; noble children, naturally, would never dabble in such crude and disgusting matters. Even Cui Lueshang, after watching for a while, felt uncomfortable and simply pulled Li Yuan and the others up a high slope to enjoy the night mountain scenery. Li Yuan and Cui Lueshang chatted and laughed, then Li Yuan gave the short, thin, and ugly Liu Yineng a wink. This guy, infamous in Xiangcheng for peeping at women bathing at five, kicking down a widow's door at nine, sleeping with all the maids around him by twelve, and having slept with every woman in Xiangcheng's brothels, including the madam, by seventeen, immediately turned back, clutching a packet of cheap poison from some low-class martial arts sect.
Originally, they planned to cripple Cui Lueshang, but now that Fang Jie had suddenly appeared as a scapegoat, they became even more reckless. Even if they poisoned Cui Lueshang, they could frame Fang Jie with a story of murder for money in the wilderness. Would the constables, magistrates, or even prefects of Xiangcheng really investigate thoroughly and offend the Li and Liu families?
The Cui family's power in Xiangcheng was far less than that of the Li and Liu families, so in Li Yuan and Liu Yineng's eyes, this was no big deal. But these two, one cunning and the other ruthless, both thought themselves clever but completely forgot to consider that in the previous two martial arts academy recruitments, Governor Yang Xiuchen of Hexi Circuit recommended members of the Li family. Why, this time, was it the Cui family, a mere second-rate family in Longxi?
Arrogance taken to the extreme is folly.
Just two months ago, His Majesty the Emperor promoted Consort Cui to the rank of Imperial Concubine.
The poison Liu Yineng possessed was utterly worthless. It wasn't the finest secret recipe from Sanxiaotang, nor the Seven-Step Poison of Guikuzi, nor the Hundred Flower Poison of that madwoman from Lingyan Valley. It was just a bottle of cheap poison bought from some lowlife in the martial arts world, enough to buy ten bottles for a single string of cash.
Inferior quality as it may be, it was deadly.
The big dog sitting to the side, boiling water, smirked and couldn't help but mutter "filthy thing" under his breath. Then, he lamented to himself, "Having such a keen sense of smell isn't always a good thing; this damn poison's stench is truly awful."
Liu Yineng pretended to watch Fang Jie skin the roe deer, then secretly sprinkled the packet of poison into the iron pot, blocking the large dog's view. The water in the pot suddenly crackled and popped a few times. The large dog couldn't help but sigh inwardly, "It must have been hard for you to use such rubbish poison," then deliberately turned its head away, pretending not to notice.
Even Fang Jie couldn't help but twitch his lips at such a low-level tactic, mentally cursing every member of Liu Yineng's family for eighteen generations. But he absolutely refrained from cursing any of Liu Yineng's female relatives. The reason was simple: Liu Yineng was simply too ugly, and Fang Jie had no desire for such a person's maternal lineage.
The fact that the poisoned individuals had to pretend not to see it made Fang Jie truly worry for this arrogant young master who swaggered around Xiangcheng. Such methods only worked in Xiangcheng, and he'd always be Li Yuan's lackey. If he encountered someone from a truly powerful family in the capital, he'd be played to death long ago, leaving not even ashes.
Having poisoned the water, Liu Yineng turned and left, smugly pleased with himself.
Big Dog glanced at the pot of foam and asked Fang Jie, "What do we do? Has this idiot never even seen what boiled water looks like? This water's all mushy, like porridge."
Fang Jie sighed, got up, and used a wooden ladle to carefully skim off the foam from the boiling water. "Don't blame him, an amateur is still an amateur."
...
...
Pheasants need boiling water to remove their feathers, and deer need to be washed after skinning. So, both of these things, having come into contact with water, are poisonous. This was something Big Dog couldn't tolerate, and he cursed Liu Yineng's ancestors countless times in his heart. He could tolerate wasting anything, but wasting meat was unacceptable to him.
If Fang Jie hadn't repeatedly promised to take him to the best restaurants and the best banquets once they got to the capital, Big Dog might have immediately gone on strike.
So, while rejoicing at encountering such a pig-like opponent, Fang Jie also lamented that he had to be wary of such a pig-like teammate. Oh no, a dog-like teammate. After a agonizing half-hour, Fang Jie finally finished preparing the food and wine to entertain his distinguished guests. The moment the roasted meat was sliced and laid out, both Li Yuan and Fang Jie secretly breathed a sigh of relief.
"Where's the wine?"
Seeing that the dog, who had gone to fetch the wine from the carriage, hadn't returned, Fang Jie feigned displeasure and called out, "You're taking so long to get me some wine! Do you think I pay you too much? When we get to Chang'an, I'll hire someone smarter. This old, clumsy dog is completely useless!"
Li Yuan and Cui Lueshang instinctively looked at the carriage, only to see it shaking violently. Even the slow-moving horses seemed startled and almost ran off. Cui Lueshang, watching with trepidation, couldn't help but ask Fang Jie, "Why is your wine locked in an iron box? Why is there such a commotion to get it?"
Fang Jie then realized something and couldn't help but silently pray for the dog. Just then, Big Dog tumbled out of the carriage with a thud, landing face-first.
He struggled to his feet, carrying two wine sacks, and staggered towards them. He had a dark circle under his eye, and half his lip was swollen. He muttered as he walked, "Getting the wine…you think it's that easy?"
Fang Jie quickly went to meet him, took the wine sacks, and chuckled, "This old guy loves to steal my wine, so he hid it well."
Big Dog snorted, turned, and walked to the carriage. He sat down against a tree, rubbing his aching lip, and muttered under his breath, "Mu Xiaoyao…it's just two sacks of your wine, is it really necessary to be so ruthless?"
Fortunately, he spoke very softly, and Li Yuan and the others couldn't hear him.
Fang Jie personally filled the cups for Li Yuan, Cui Lueshang, and the others, smiling obsequiously as he said, "This servant is from the countryside and hasn't seen much of the world; please don't take offense, gentlemen. But this wine is excellent; it can only be bought from the border town of Fangu."
Cui Lueshang picked up his cup, smelled it, and couldn't help but praise, "The aroma is wonderful; it's truly fine wine. Even without tasting it, I can tell it's been aged for at least three to five years."
Li Yuan, also a connoisseur of wine, couldn't resist taking a sip.
"Indeed, it's quite good. Although it can't compare to Longtan Brew from Xiangcheng, it's still a rare find. I never imagined such a quiet and remote place like Fan Gu would produce such fine wine. Truly remarkable."
"The wine is excellent, and Brother Shang's cooking is even more superb!"
Li Yuan pointed to the roasted meat in front of him and praised, "Golden brown, crispy on the outside and tender on the inside."
"Want to try some?"
Fang Jie quickly said, "Let's see if it suits your taste."
Li Yuan hesitated for a moment. Liu Yineng, seeing this, quickly said, "Brother Shang is the host today, and we are the guests. It's not right for the host to eat before the guests. You eat first, then we'll eat."
Fang Jie put down the chopsticks he had already picked up and said earnestly, "No, no, precisely because I am the host today, and you gentlemen are the guests, it's not right for the guests to eat before the host. I see that Young Master Li is highly respected; Young Master Li should take the first bite today, otherwise, if we keep going back and forth like this, the food will get cold."
Li Yuan quickly waved his hand and said, "We..." "It's all thanks to Young Master Cui that we can enjoy such delicious food. Why don't you let Young Master Cui start first?"
Cui Lueshang, being an honest man, thought for a moment and said, "Then I'll eat first."
"Wait!"
Fang Jie stopped him, saying, "Our Great Sui is a land of etiquette; we cannot lose our manners. How about this, let's talk about our ages, and whoever is the oldest eats first."
Cui Lueshang smiled, "That's good!"
Li Yuan's face paled. Looking at the people around him, he realized he was the oldest: "That's not good... The older should naturally let the younger eat first; that's the virtue promoted by the Great Sui."
"That's right!"
Cui Lueshang said, "Brother Shang, you are undoubtedly the youngest; you should eat first."
"No, Young Master Li should eat first."
"Brother Shang, eat first."
"Young Master Li, eat first."
"Brother Shang, eat first."
They argued back and forth more than ten times, neither willing to eat first. In the end, no words could be found to refuse, and no one dared to touch their chopsticks first.
Just then, a fragrant breeze wafted by, followed by a red figure blocking their view. As everyone froze, they saw a stunningly beautiful woman in a red dress forcefully push Li Yuan to the ground, pry open her mouth with one hand, and pour the contents of a plate into her mouth with the other!
"Damn it! I'm dying to know!"
Mu Xiaoyao cursed, glaring fiercely at Fang Jie.