The memorial garden was quiet.
Three days had passed since the warehouse. Three days of what Marcus called training but was really just systematic beatings in the underground room.
Now the Vigil gathered to mark Elena's passing.
Adrian stood with the other Initiates in the courtyard behind headquarters. The space was small. Bordered by stone walls on three sides and iron gates on the fourth. A dozen wooden markers stood in neat rows. Each carved with a name and date.
Hunter Elena Frost would be the thirteenth.
The morning was grey and cold. Fog clung to the cobblestones. Adrian could see his breath in the air but he barely felt the chill.
Everything feels distant. Like I'm watching this happen to someone else.
Warden Cross stood at the front. His black coat pristine despite the damp. Behind him, a fresh wooden marker waited.
"We gather to honour one who fell in service," Cross began. His voice carried across the silent courtyard. "Hunter Elena Frost. She died protecting this city from threats most will never know existed."
Adrian's hands clenched at his sides. His nails dug into his palms but the pain was distant. Just another ache among the bruises Marcus had given him over the past three days.
They put up markers like that means something. Like remembering them helps.
Around him, Hunters stood in formal rows. Some he recognised. Most he didn't. All wore the same careful expression. Professional grief. Controlled mourning.
Thomas stood beside Adrian. His face was wet with tears he wasn't bothering to hide. His shoulders shook slightly. He'd known Elena longer. Trained with her. She'd been his friend.
On Adrian's other side, Julian stood rigid. Even his usual arrogance was subdued. His face was pale. His eyes were fixed on Elena's marker. For once he looked his age. Just another scared nineteen-year-old who'd watched someone die.
Even Julian looks shaken.
"Elena Frost showed promise beyond her years," Cross continued. "She had months of distinguished service ahead of her. A career that would have saved countless lives."
Because I froze.
Marcus stood at the back of the gathering. His face was stone. His eyes were distant. Looking at something no one else could see. Kane stood beside him. One hand still touching his bruised throat. Mara was there too. Supported by crutches. Her left leg in a cast.
They'd survived. Elena hadn't.
Doctor Rhys held a leather-bound book. The official record of Vigil deaths. He stepped forward.
"Let it be known," Rhys said, his voice steady, "that on the seventh day of the second month, in the year of our Lord eighteen hundred and forty-three, Hunter Elena Frost gave her life in defence of Arathia. May her sacrifice be remembered. May her service be honoured."
He closed the book with a soft thud that echoed in the silence.
Elena's family wasn't present. The records listed them as deceased. She'd been alone in the world except for the Vigil.
And now she was just gone.
She had no one. Just like me.
Two Hunters stepped forward. They carried the wooden marker to its designated spot and drove it into the earth with careful precision.
Hunter Elena Frost. Died in Service.
That was all it said. No dates. No details. Just acknowledgement that she'd existed and then stopped existing.
That's all any of us get. A wooden marker and a line in a book.
The ceremony ended without fanfare. Cross dismissed them with a nod. The crowd began to disperse in quiet groups. Whispered conversations. Hands on shoulders.
Thomas turned to Adrian. His eyes were red, but his voice was steady.
"Are you okay?"
Adrian looked at him. Really looked. Thomas's genuine concern. His open grief. The way he was trying to be strong for both of them.
"No."
The word came out flat. Honest. The first truly honest thing Adrian had said to anyone since they'd returned from the warehouse.
Thomas nodded slowly. "Me neither."
He walked away. Joining a group of other Initiates near the gates. They moved together. Finding comfort in shared loss.
Adrian stood alone as the courtyard emptied. The fog was thicker now. Obscuring the far walls. Only the memorial marker remained visible. A dark shape against grey stone.
He walked to Elena's marker. Knelt in the damp grass.
The wood was fresh. Still smelled of sawdust and varnish. Someone had carved her name with care. Each letter precise and even.
Hunter Elena Frost.
She was excited that night. Glowing. She said it was routine.
She'd been practically glowing with anticipation for her first real hunt. She'd told Adrian it was routine. Nothing to worry about.
And then the claw had punched through her spine.
Adrian closed his eyes but that made it worse. He could still see it. The way she'd stopped mid-word. The way her arms had gone limp. The wet sound when her upper body hit the ground.
She'd never even screamed.
She never even knew. One second she was talking. Analysing. Being Elena. The next she was dead.
His throat tightened. His hands shook against the grass.
He'd frozen. When it mattered most. When Elena needed someone to warn her. To do something. Anything. He'd frozen.
My throat locked. The words wouldn't come. The revolver slipped from my hands.
The revolver had slipped from his hands. He'd stood there like a useless piece of shit while Marcus and Kane fought for their lives.
"I'm sorry," he whispered to the marker. To the memory. "I'm sorry."
The words felt hollow. Meaningless. Sorry didn't bring her back. Sorry didn't change what had happened.
Sorry doesn't mean anything. She's still dead. Still in pieces in that warehouse.
Adrian stood. His legs were unsteady.
He looked at the marker one last time. Then turned and walked back toward the building.
I can't stay here. Can't keep staring at wood and pretending it matters.
The corridors were empty. Most people were still in the courtyard or had gone to the mess hall. Adrian walked alone through passages that were becoming familiar.
Up stairs. Down hallways. Past closed doors.
He reached his room and unlocked the door with hands that wouldn't stop shaking.
Inside was dark. He didn't light the lamp. Just closed the door behind him and stood in the centre of the small space.
His Shadow Sight activated automatically. Everything was perfectly clear despite the lack of light. The bed. The desk. The window showing grey fog outside.
Adrian sat on the floor. His back against the wall.
Every part of him hurt. Three days of Marcus's training had left him black and blue. His ribs throbbed. His face was swollen. His arms were covered in bruises from blocking strikes he'd been too slow to avoid.
Marcus hasn't said a word. Just beats me. Over and over. No corrections. No instruction. Just punishment.
Deserved punishment
Adrian's mind kept replaying the moment. Over and over. The claw emerging from the darkness. Elena's body separating. The blood spreading across the warehouse floor.
I saw it. My sight showed me everything. The creature dropping. The claw. All of it. And I did nothing.
He'd been useless. Completely. Utterly useless.
I didn't even try. Just stood there. Waiting to die. While Elena was ripped apart.
Never again.
The thought formed slowly. Crystallised into something solid and cold.
Never again would he freeze. Never again would he drop his weapon. Never again would he stand there waiting to die while someone else fought.
Whatever it takes. Whatever I have to become. I won't be useless again.
The shadows in the corners of the room trembled slightly. Rippled like disturbed water. Then settled back into stillness.
Adrian didn't notice. He sat in the dark. His hands clenched into fists. And let the cold resolve settle into his bones.
Elena's dead. I'm alive. That has to mean something. It has to.
Elena was dead.
He was alive.
And he would make sure that meant something.