In the end, Su Ming still couldn't "flick" Kiana out of existence.
He even got assigned to help her move. (tragic)
But then Su Ming remembered something amusing: a certain group chat member's unhinged username—
**"My girlfriend's yuzhu smells like her husband's ."
If Kiana truly succeeded in enforcing "one husband, one wife"… wouldn't that also mean she succeeded in achieving that cursed username?
Pfft—hahahaha!
Thinking about it, Su Ming couldn't hold back and laughed out loud.
Ahem. No, no. I absolutely wasn't thinking about that kind of thing. Two in the arms, one in the lap? Not interested. My loyalty to Mei rises beyond the heavens!
"Why are you laughing all of a sudden? Psycho," Kiana asked, baffled. "Who just laughs while walking down the street?"
"Nothing. I thought of something happy."
This time it was true.
Su Ming forcibly suppressed the grin. He couldn't let Kiana know what he'd been thinking, or she'd roast him into ash.
"This guy's definitely thinking of some trash meme again. Men. Serious outside, pervert inside," Bronya's sharp tongue landed perfectly on his weak spot.
Bronya had come along voluntarily. She wasn't about to let Su Ming and Kiana be alone together. Mei wasn't either—so Mei went grocery shopping with angelic Seele, while Bronya and Kiana came along to "balance" each other out.
Tonight, everyone would gather at Su Ming's place. Mei, as hostess, would handle ingredients; Seele—also skilled in cooking—went with her. The rest were professional eaters.
At the moment, Bronya and Kiana looked calm on the surface, but were clashing violently underneath. Forget the sparks from their eye contact—the two were literally pushing each other across Su Ming, using him as the battleground.
They wedged him between them, not hugging, not clinging—just constantly closing in, squeezing him so hard he could barely breathe.
Is this "fanservice"? Don't be stupid. How do you get fanservice from walking shoulder to shoulder? Neither is leaning into his arms.
And somehow, both had shoulders and elbows like iron. While they secretly fought, even Su Ming's strong constitution couldn't stop the pain.
Why is it me getting beaten up when women fight? Is this boomerang payback already?!
Su Ming decided to declare today "National Boomerang Day."
Luckily, it didn't last long. They soon reached Kiana's rented place. Su Ming stepped inside first and let the two girls continue their "war" outside.
Smack.
Still pushing, they collided. Their crossed gazes were full of gunpowder.
Steaming buns—are you even worthy? Kiana's eyes said.
Hah. Just a cheap head start. Enjoy your ten seconds of pride, Bronya's eyes replied.
Watch me take Su Ming down, Kiana glowed with confidence.
We'll see, Bronya's gaze promised murder.
After that brief exchange, they separated.
Earlier, their pushing had been to torture Su Ming—otherwise, "sisters" wouldn't hit that hard. Despite their growing rift, they had perfect synergy in that department.
"Kiana, your style… is still as childlike as ever," Su Ming said after a glance.
"I'm cheerful and innocent, okay? What's your problem?" Kiana puffed her cheeks, hands on hips.
"High EQ: childlike. Low EQ: childish," Bronya said.
"You—! …Forget it. I'm in a good mood today. I won't stoop to your level~"
Kiana ignored them and started packing.
"Here, take these."
Two big bags of clothes came flying his way.
…So she'd planned this.
Su Ming caught them steadily—absolutely without any degenerate urge to peek inside.
A faint scent drifted up. Su Ming reflexively sniffed.
Fresh, citrusy—definitely not Mei's scent. Kiana's was surprisingly "clean."
Wait.
Su Ming glanced sideways and found Bronya staring at him with undisguised contempt. He stopped immediately.
"I didn't do anything."
He raised a crisp salute.
"I'll carry these. You go carry other stuff," Bronya said, taking the bags—and sniffing once herself. As a girl, she immediately picked up the details.
Hah. That idiot paramecium definitely stuffed lingerie in here too. Good thing I took it. Otherwise she'd get exactly what she wanted.
"Kiana, I need you to come help me for a second~" Kiana called from the bedroom, sounding like she was exerting force.
Su Ming looked at Bronya. She didn't seem to object, so he went.
A huge teddy bear was wedged in the wardrobe, somehow stuck.
So that's it. A classic romantic-comedy setup? Kiana, what have you been watching?
Su Ming approached, grumbling internally.
So she wants me to help push, then "accidentally" fall into me? Hah. Easy—
"Whoa—ow!"
Before he even reached her, Kiana let out the fakest yelp imaginable and toppled toward him.
"…Huh?"
Kiana squeezed her eyes shut and waited to land against him.
Nothing.
She opened her eyes and saw Su Ming's hands planted on her shoulders, effortlessly holding her upright.
Impossible!
Kiana was shocked. That shoulder-check could knock doors open. How did Su Ming react so fast—and have that much strength? Did Hua's training really boost him that much?!
So she hadn't even considered whether she'd break his ribs?
"Careful, Kiana. You can't sleep here," Su Ming said dryly, mocking her.
"You unromantic bastard!" Kiana ground her teeth.
"I used to not believe the 'trip on flat ground' trope," Bronya said. "Now I've seen it in person~"
....
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