It is always a fantasy of mine to destroy Monarchies. Why? Two reasons. One is Pride. As in I don't like when people are important based on only birthright. I want raw, capable people in charge of countries. And two, I hate betrothals so hard it makes me want to murder everyone who ever helped make one happen. And Monarchies do it the most, so it's a general go fuck yourself button over that alone.
I have decided to spend my wealth on an aesthetically torturous angle. I have my portal be spawned one hundred feet above them as a weird sigil thing that looks like a meme from magic anime land. Anyway, it's like, thirty feet tall and 30 feet wide.
It manifests in their sky for like, a minute. And then it's going to remain behind as its main purpose is to blast my music while I whoop their asses down below.
I'm rocking out to my playlist Fuckboy Machivelli Versus The Church Versus The Government.
Anyway, I jump out the portal and propel myself down at high speeds with high grade fire magic. Armed with my Super Sledge from before, the introductory goal is simple. Motherfucking Meteor Drop, followed by wanton carnage of their military if they're brave.
I am impeded on my drop down with a barrage of fireballs and arrows. Looks like they're competent. Whatever, I'm a Demigod of War.
I push my way through their attacks, judging their damage. Only three attacks matter, and I memorize their attackers. Two mages, both middle aged men. One wears a blue robe, the other wears green. Blue shot ice, green fired poisonous moss that digs into my skin. And the third is a buff archer that managed to pierce my shoulder armor and dig into my shoulder a bit. He is the most dangerous to me based on current damage potential. But they are Mages, that could've been a weak grade spell from them.
I slam the Super Sledge into the ground, causing an Earthquake to shake through the area. I spin around the hammer, working off kinetic energy as I slide about. Firing with precision of a Gunner God that shouldn't exist like Roland from Dark Tower. I don't even stop moving, but I still get headshots.
12 men dead within a single barrage and seemingly frantic, but precise arm flailing and a few spins on my heels. Then I dash forward through their town square. Tearing up a storm of flowers as I run so fast, the plants get ruined due to wind pressure like I'm Neo from the Matrix flying too fast.
Guards pretend to try stopping me, but I just shoot them upside the head and dash past like they're fucking meaningless fodder.
I'm bored already. It's such stagnant air, I thought they were supposed to be Arch Mages here. Did they not give their soldiers any magical gear?
I pull out my weed vape and a cigarette. I smoke it, honestly hoping it provokes a challenge. Knowing from previous experiences, dumb assholes like Church f@gs will get offended by this mere expression of freedom. Especially when it isn't even technology from their planet. But maybe I'm dreaming with that one.
I begin my smoke break as the soldiers eye me down, shaking in their boots as I casually smoke and glare daggers at them all. Spinning on my heels occasionally, surveying the scene. And I'm getting excited.
They're setting something up. With my enhanced hearing, I even hear sigils being painted onto the floors and walls around me. And I love the concept of an Army versus Me. Let's Rock It. Eventually. I'm finishing my smoke break.
Suddenly a green sun manifests 200 feet above me and like, thirty feet forward. With the Child Prodigy floating in the air, one hand casually held high with a maniacal grin. He looks like a stereotypical Child Prince spoiled too hard. He wears a silver crown studded with jewels and a furry red cap in the center with white stripes and some sparkles. A red cape with gold shoulder pads. A blue jacket with a puffy white collar I think is a handkerchief. And red pants with black dress shoes. He has short brown hair and green eyes.
"You dare invade my kingdom when I was in the middle of the latest Punch and Judy skit!" Child Prince yells furiously.
I'm mildly amused that this dimension copied Punch and Judy. It's a funny coincidence that happens when you consider dimensions are supposed to be clones of each other to an extent.
Anyway, I pick up a rock and throw it really hard at him. The Child in response, throws his fireball at me. Which consumes the rock in the process. I sigh, annoyed. And decide to try running away from the child for now. While still going full steam ahead.
Amplifying myself with fire and wind magic, I air dash ahead past him, causing a Sonic Boom which unfortunately, based on a child's scream of pain, burst his ear drums or something. Sucks to suck, kid.
Anyway, I reached the Palace within a minute. The Palace is a mix of Arabia and England to me. It's got the onion tops on some towers, white sandstone, red bricks, and cathedral towers covered with stained glass. With of course, sadly lame long lines of standard concrete stone walls and towers for people to fight on. And not to look pretty on sadly.
I am in front of gate guarding the path to the inside. Which ummm… teleport to the other side and strut in like a dick. Guards on the other side are stunned as I casually open fire after doing that with one hand and strutting like a pimp.
I actually miss a few times cause I'm having too much fun. Then finally a challenge shows up. A local Arch Mage of the castle wearing a somewhat modern look. She is my height, she wears a red and black hoodie that looks like it was once robes cut in half at the waist. It's covered in glowing white runes. Half red, half black pants. And boots with crimson soles that remind me of August Caeser's shoes. They're bloodstained for fun intimidation. She wields a polearm wrapped in glowing crystals, which means it doubles as a magical staff to me already.
And she is as always with my favorite women, the yandere girl is a beautiful psychopath. She's tanned with red hair and pitch black eyes that reflect the light in a cute way like off a bug's exoskeleton. And she has a line of blood red runes going from the right side of her forehead, down her face, down past the eye and down to her diamond jawline.
She smiles maliciously at me as she swipes her polearm gracefully with one hand, leaving a shallow cut in the ground. That a thick torrent of red roots rush out of, crawling rapidly across the ground while giving off a blood mist or something. It smells like copper to me the most, but there's other things mixed in.
A doubled edged move, but it's perfect against plants. I sheathe a pistol, and with my left hand point my palm out. And shoot a torrent of flames, trying to burn the plants. They still crawl through, turning to an ugly black with orange puff coming out the roots. An intriguing reaction, which suggests it has been cooked.
But still move enough to annoy me, and she didn't even flinch. Her response was making the roots pick her up, and throw herself at me while she does something I'd call an Execution Tackle. As she's trying to clothesline me with her polesword and cut my head off.
I stand my ground, sheathe my other pistol, and catch her polearm with both hands. The sheer force of her speed versus my grit and sheer strength causes a minor clash followed by a burst of air pressure shaking the area within 20 feet of us.
The bloodlust in us both wins out briefly. We both dare trying biting each other in this close quarters. I go for her right hand so she'll let go of her polesword. She went for my throat, but I block with my forearm. I don't get her fingers, she punches me as I swing her aside with her teeth dug into my forearm.
Polesword forgotten as we fall to the ground as she drags me down as I tried slamming her into the dirt with sheer strength and my forearm. But she's wrapped around me tight, so I fall with her. We sprawl wildly on the ground for a second, hitting each other wildly as we try regaining out footing.
I manage it first, on one knee and one foot with my toes planted against the ground. In this position, I swing a hard haymaker into her face. She screams a banshee scream, hurting my ears and using sound pressure to slow my punch and basically shred it as it emanates in the sonic waves.
In response, with my other hand I yank out a pistol, swing it around through her sonic scream, and press it against her forehead. I try firing, but she screams even louder! Bursting the bullet's shell first without it firing properly, which clogs my gun. It jams with a burst of sparks out the back.
"Fucking bitch." I growl angrily.
I whip the gun around, grabbing it by the barrel, and slam it into her fucking skull. It's enough to shut her up and realize to drop that move.
She responds by touching her head and seeing I gave her a concussion. I smirk cockily, until the twist happens.
She's a blood mage. She shoots a strong torrent of blood out her own skull, which I narrowly dodge and begin running and dodging from like it's an ultimate snake whip thing. She whips it so fast and hard I'm essentially in a high speed schizo dance phase as I am barely dodging this thing.
As I dodge, I'm haphazardly firing shots at her which she is melting with her blood whip so easily, it is fucking annoying me.
I decide to be smart, and try a intense burst of air pressure like an Almighty Push from Naruto. It thankfully disperses the blood whip into a burst of blood droplets. I rush through it, and land a sick haymaker into her face.
As she is sent flying away, she grins maniacally and claps her hands together. The blood droplets surge into me, each blood droplet like a bullet's worth of pain followed by trying to melt me. I again do my wind burst to get the blood off of me, which works well but hurt like shit.
This woman is my first boss fight, it seems. I love it. If only she wasn't trying to kill me, as per usual with my favorite type of women. Yandere women that can fight and whup ass as good as me.
Such fantasies fill me. Eugenics even a bit as I imagine the combat potential of our kids as always when I see someone like her.
But we must move on. Probably. I don't know. I could try talking to her a bit. I'm not even too invested in this mission. It's just cash.