"How could you have formed your dantian!?"
'Wait... what did I just hear?!'
This immediately caught the attention of Geonu, who had been guarding the room.
He leaned in, listening closely to the conversation. Doctor Guyang was in deep disbelief, staring at me as though he were witnessing an impossible phenomenon.
This was something he had long considered nearly impossible, and even if it did happen, the price would be enormous.
That alone made him frightened, and he turned toward the 8th Young Lord, looking for answers to explain this strange occurrence.
'That's impossible! There's no way to form a dantian except... relying on Those methods.'
If he had really relied on something like Those methods, then it would only be a temporary fix but with permanent consequences.
While he stared at me in disbelief, I could also see on his face an expression saying I had made a huge mistake.
I decided to ignored all of that and continued to maintain my act of being oblivious.
"I do?! Did you say I have a dantian!? This is great-"
"How can that be?! I knew your body would never be able to cultivate, that's simply how your body is! But how could this happen?! It doesn't make any sense!!"
Before I could finish, he cut me off and began rambling to himself about things that shocked me.
What I heard left me stunned though not entirely, since I had already suspected something was off.
But still, the results I had now completely disproved those doubts.
In my previous life, even though I had to believe my body couldn't cultivate the results of countless failures proved it and yet I stubbornly refused to accept it.
But in this life, the results have changed as I was now able to cultivate and the formed my dantian, it has proven otherwise that I could cultivate.
The reason is that no one had ever told me outright that I was truly unable to cultivate, which was why I continued to pursue the martial path.
"What do you mean by that, Doctor Guyang?"
"?!!... I-I..."
I had to ask. His words were too strange to ignore, and my question snapped him out of his rambling.
He suddenly looked nervous, unable to reply for a while, as if terrified of what he was about to reveal.
That made me afraid as well as if the truth would bring more misfortune than fortune.
But I was determined. Even if I may regret hearing it later, Right now i wanted to hear it.
"I... Hah... perhaps it's about time I finally tell you this. To be honest, I should have told you a long time ago."
"Gulp... Tell me what?"
I couldn't help but swallow in anticipation and fear as it seems he was hiding something for me for a long time.
What had he been hiding that was so grave they chose not to tell me? Did they think I was so mentally fragile that I couldn't handle such a truth?
Now I was determined not only to learn it, but to prove myself capable of hearing it.
"What I've been hiding from you since the moment I discovered it... is that... that..."
Doctor Guyang hesitated. He knew once he spoke about it, there would be no turning back from this.
But the truth had to be revealed eventually. He decided to explain it slowly and gently, allowing the truth to sink in.
"Before that, I must ask you a couple of questions. First: do you know the basic principle of cultivation?"
"Basic principle of cultivation?"
I was confused and wondered how that was related to what he has been hiding from me.
Perhaps what he had been hiding had something to do with how I was now able to cultivate and form my dantian.
But yes of course I knew it, The basic principle of cultivation was to absorb the life energy of the surroundings to strengthen the body and extend one's lifespan.
That was the original purpose of cultivation, which later evolved toward achieving immortality and incredible power.
There were now many cultivation paths, each with its own purpose, but the path I sought to embark on was the Martial Path.
But this wasn't the time for reflecting on this. I couldn't keep him waiting for my answer.
'With all my research regarding cultivation, there's no way I wouldn't know.'
"Yes, I know."
"Good. That makes explaining things easier. Then another question: if there is life energy, what is its opposite?"
'The opposite of life energy?'
I was confused. The opposite of life... wouldn't that be death? So the opposite of life energy must be death energy.
Death energy is the energy left behind by the death of living things. Just as life energy is always present, so is death energy. As long as life exists, death will also exist, forming a balance between the two.
While I was still confused I was still pretty confident in what I knew and my answer.
"That is death energy."
"Correct. As you know, death energy is the opposite of the life energy used in cultivation to enhance one's health, body, and more."
"Yes, I already know that, so please get to the point, sir."
"Alright, I will just in a moment. Since cultivation relies on life energy... what if, instead of using life energy, we used death energy?"
"Cultivation using death energy?!"
Although I admitted I was getting impatient, I didn't expect to hear something so absurd.
Cultivating using death energy? It was ridiculous to even hear that, it would defeat the entire purpose of cultivation.
Death energy was a lethal force that even just being near a large amount of it could kill a weak and frail person.
Instead of strengthening the body, it would weaken it, slowly pushing the person cultivating toward death the more they cultivated.
It was essentially suicide. Not even my past self who was insane and reckless enough to attempt countless dangerous methods would ever attempt something so insane.
"Wouldn't that defeat the whole purpose of cultivation?! A person would just die from being near large amounts of it!"
"That's right."
"Then why are we talking about this?! How does this relate to what you're hiding?!"
"Be patient, 8th Young Lord. I promised you that you needed to understand this before I tell you the truth."
I was growing increasingly impatient, and also increasimgly terrified. Just his words of death implied something dreadful was happening.
Doctor Guyang seemingly sensed what I was feeling, and hurried his explanation. I forced myself to calm down and arguing about this would only delay things.
"Fine... please proceed."
"Then, Young Master, allow me to ask one more thing, this time regarding your cultivation."
"Yes, you may ask."
This was already the third question. Just how many were in this so-called "couple" of questions?
Did he think I was stupid, needing to ask these simple questions to gauge my understanding? I was almost offended.
Although it was slightly insulting, I couldn't really blame him as if this were my past, younger self with no memories of my regression, he would've been right.
"Alright then, Young Master... haven't you always felt, when cultivating, that your qi flows roughly and heavily through your meridians as if being pushed back?"
"Hmm... come to think of it, yes."
I recalled that whenever I cultivated, the qi flowing through my meridians always felt like it was hiking up a steep mountain, like a fish swimming against a river's current.
Only after using the reverse qi flow method did I manage to cultivate properly. With that method, everything felt smooth and natural. Thank Heaven's Death that it worked.
"The reason for that is because cultivation, for you, was never supposed to work that way."
"Never supposed to...? Why?"
"Because of the way your meridians are."
"My meridians...? What's wrong with them?"
I could tell were getting closer to what he had been hiding. But how could my meridians be responsible?
I had always assumed they simply struggled to accept qi flow, and that my method compensated for that.
Yes, they all had qi blockages, but that was nothing Doctor Guyang who is known as the Life and Death Doctor couldn't overcome.
So there had to be another reason for the involvement of my meridians aside from the fact all cultivation relies on the meridians.
"The thing is, Young Lord... your meridians' functions are naturally reversed from birth."
"WHAT?!"
I was stunned. All this time, I thought my meridians were just flawed and the method I created happened to overcome those flaws.
But to think the true reason was that my meridians' functions were reversed from the start.
That would mean the reverse qi flow method wasn't some grand innovation, it was simply the correct way for me to cultivate.
'I guess the reverse qi flow method is just a method made for people who have reversed meridians like me.'
I was not disappointed. In fact, I was actually really relieved, this meant the method was safe and perfectly suited to me, without any hidden dangers.
But still, I couldn't see what this had to do with death energy and the others. Although... a part of me felt like I was subconsciously avoiding the answer.
"Wait, Doctor Guyang... what's so bad about that? Couldn't I just cultivate in reverse to fix it?"
"That's the thing. It's not that simple."
"Not simple?"
I was confused. With the method I created, this should be solvable. Did he really not know how to resolve it? Sure, it took me years to invent the method, but only because I needed inspiration to even think of cultivating in reverse.
Still... why would he hide this from me if it wasn't something dreadful and better with me not knowing?
"The truth is, we living beings naturally cultivate-even if we aren't fully aware of it."
"What?!"
"Yes, I know it's hard to believe, but we constantly circulate life energy with our surroundings."
I was surprised, but it wasn't impossible. There were many cases of people cultivating without realizing it.
If this were true, it would also explain why I was frail and prone to sickness, it was that I couldn't cultivate in that unconscious manner.
"Say I choose to believe that. Why does it matter now? I can cultivate, can't I?"
"The thing is, Young Lord... your ability to cultivate is exactly the problem. You should never cultivate."
"What?! Why?!"
Why tell me this now after everything he had done, visiting every month trying to cure me? Shouldn't he be relieved I finally had a solution?
But from his tone, I knew this wasn't a simple reason like wanting to cure it himself, this was serious. Very serious.
Instead of answering my question, Doctor Guyang decided that dragging this out any longer was pointless.
"Young Lord... have you ever considered that your inability to cultivate might have actually been preserving your life?"
"Huh? Preserving my life? What do you mean?!"
Was he insulting me? Saying something so absurd, didn't he know how desperately I had wanted to cultivate?
The agony of being unable to cultivate was something he could never understand. If he did, he wouldn't say something like this to me.
I felt furious, but I forced myself to remain calm. I understood that there was clearly more to this.
"I already knew the reason you couldn't cultivate, It was because all your meridians, Young Lord, contained extremely tough qi blockages."
I had suspected that he knew about my qi blockages. But I couldn't believe he hadn't done anything or even bothered to tell me.
Not just him, none of the doctors I met ever mentioned this. What were they so afraid of that they chose to keep me in the dark?
If I had known from the beginning, I wouldn't have wasted years attempting methods that had nothing to do with this.
"If you knew... why didn't you tell me? Couldn't you have cured me? Broken the blockages so I could cultivate?"
"That's the thing, Young Lord. If I did... it would have made your situation far worse than it already was."
"Worse?! Nothing is worse than not being able to cultivate!"
I couldn't help but shout. To claim that removing my blockages would make things worse made no sense. Isn't a doctor's priority to treat their patient's condition?
Not being able to cultivate was considered one of the worst afflictions a person could be born with.
"Young Lord, I know how ridiculous this sounds, but please allow me to explain."
"...Hah... fine. Go on."
I took deep breaths to calm myself. Getting angry wouldn't give me answers. I needed to listen even if I doubted I would accept anything he said.
No explanation would satisfy me. I simply couldn't accept any of this nonsense he was spewing but I couldn't disregard it.
"Remember what we discussed-about the basic principle of cultivation? We use life energy when cultivating normally... but that only applies to people with normal meridians. But what of someone with reversed meridians?"
"They may not be able to cultivate normally, but shouldn't they be able to cultivate if they do everything in reverse?"
"It was impressive that you came up with such a method. And while you are correct... it is precisely why I said your inability to cultivate was your last saving grace."
He seemed to be implying that reverse cultivation itself was the source of my problems.
But that made no sense. I had never once practiced reverse cultivation before my regression.
It was only afterward that I created the Reverse Qi Flow Method and only that had allowed me to cultivate at all.
That method was the natural form of cultivation for someone like me with reversed meridians. It shouldn't have any drawbacks.
I should be able to take in life energy normally like the others so what was the issue?
"In normal cultivation, we take in and circulate life energy, But if we cultivate in reverse... then we take in death energy."
"Hmm... But shouldn't my reversed meridians mean that cultivating in reverse restores things to normal?"
"It may seem that way, but it is not as simple as you imagine. People with reversed meridians who cultivate in reverse... still cultivate in reverse in the sense of normal cultivation."
"?!!... Then... that would mean-!"
The realization hit me like lightning. I originally believed that by cultivating in reverse, everything would align properly. But that wasn't the case.
It meant that whenever I cultivated consciously or unconsciously I was still cultivating in the opposite manner of normal cultivation.
"I was taking in death energy...?"
"That's right, Young Lord. Whenever you cultivate whether consciously or unconsciously, you absorb death energy instead of life energy."
"That can't be! If that were true, how did I survive until now?! Didn't you say we unconsciously cultivate constantly? That would mean I've been absorbing death energy for the last 15 years!!"
If so, I should have died long ago. Yet I lived for at least 35 years in my previous life before I was killed and regressed.
With the potential amount of death energy I would've accumulated... shouldn't I have already died?
"There is an explanation, Remember what I said about your qi blockages? They prevented the death energy from entering your body. That is how they protected you, they blocked the death energy absorbed during unconscious cultivation."
"Wait...! What?!"
My qi blockages which was the very thing that prevented me from cultivating had been the actual and only reason I was still alive?
I couldn't believe it. The thing that caused me so much despair... was what had been saving my life.
But then... what about now that all of my blockages were gone, I didn't think of the potential consequences of breaking through them.
"But it doesn't matter anymore, Young Lord, Your qi blockages are gone. Somehow, you broke through all of them."
"Hmm... is that a problem? Since I now have a dantian, wouldn't that solve it?"
I considered the possibility. If my dantian could store all types of internal energy like Fire, Water, Wood, Metal, Earth, Yin, and Yang then storing death energy shouldn't be difficult.
Death energy was like a more extreme form of negative yin qi. Shouldn't my dantian be able to contain it?
"I understand your thought, Young Lord,"
But it is not that simple. The more death energy stored in your dantian... the more it will spread throughout your body."
"But then...!!"
So even my dantian could not solve this. At last, I understood why he had kept this hidden.
If I had known earlier, I would've still pushed myself to cultivate only to unknowingly shorten my own life.
He hid it so that I would remain unaware, living my life normally without walking toward sudden death and now... I finally understood what he had been hiding from me.
The truth that I subconsciously avoided. The truth I now have regretted knowing and Doctor Guyang knew I would.
"Young Lord... The act of cultivating itself... is slowly killing you."
"!!!!"
****