Chapter 38: A Very "Worthwhile" Piece of Furniture
Just as Bruce was about to leave, Joey called him back and asked where he was going.
Bruce said, "I'm going to grab something to eat. I haven't eaten since breakfast—why?"
Joey replied, "No problem—I'll order another pizza. I need someone to help me run lines. Can you stick around?"
Bruce answered, "Sure. I've got nothing else going on this afternoon."
So for the next few hours they worked through Donny Donowitz's scenes: Joey played Donny, Bruce read all the other characters' lines, and after running through the script several times, Joey had his lines down cold.
At dusk they headed to Central Perk for coffee. Inside, only Rachel was behind the counter making drinks. Everyone else was seated—Ross, Monica, and Chandler were all leaning in to hear what Phoebe was saying. When Joey and Bruce suddenly appeared beside them, they all jumped.
"What are you guys whispering about? Looks pretty serious," Bruce asked as he sat down.
The others had that classic look of wanting to say something but not knowing how. Just as Ross was about to speak, Rachel came over and asked Bruce and Joey what they wanted. Joey ordered a cappuccino, Bruce a latte.
When Rachel went back behind the counter, Ross said to Phoebe, "Phoebe, I'm telling Bruce and Joey, okay?"
Phoebe answered, "Sure, go ahead."
Joey asked, "Alright, what happened?"
Ross said, "Rachel's boyfriend Paolo came in for a massage from Phoebe today and got inappropriate—took advantage of her."
"What? Does Rachel know?" Joey asked.
"We're discussing that right now. I think Phoebe needs to tell Rachel—don't you agree?" Ross looked at Bruce and Joey for support.
Joey quickly said, "Absolutely."
Bruce added, "Rachel deserves to know what Paolo did and what kind of guy he really is."
Ross turned back to Phoebe. "See? We're all on the same page."
Phoebe sighed. "Okay, I'll tell her."
Just as Phoebe finished speaking, Rachel brought over their coffees. Handing them each a cup, she asked, "Bruce, when you left this afternoon you said you were going to see Ruby—did you find him?"
"Yeah, we did. Joey and I went together. Ruby was waiting at the theater. Why do you ask?" Bruce replied.
Rachel gave an embarrassed smile. "Because after you left, I remembered: last time Ruby was sitting right here on this couch and said ninety-nine percent of people who say they'll write never finish anything. I totally argued with him—and then every single one of us who bragged about writing scripts proved him right!"
Bruce laughed. "Don't worry about it—Ruby probably doesn't even remember saying that."
Then Chandler asked, "By the way, Joey, what kind of table did you and Bruce end up getting?"
Bruce and Joey froze, looked at each other, and said in unison, "Oh crap, we completely forgot!"
Chandler looked confused. "Didn't you two specifically go out to buy a table? How do you forget that?"
Joey replied, "Did you know Ruby's now the manager of their Video Department?"
Chandler: "What does that have to do with the table?"
Joey explained, "Because Ruby's the manager, I got two hundred videotapes from him super cheap. Once I had the tapes, I rushed home to start watching them—and totally blanked on the table. Tell you what, I'll go buy one right now!"
Chandler shot back, "Sure, because furniture stores totally stay open late just in case Joey decides to show up."
Joey grinned. "Perfect—then I'll head over there."
Chandler, realizing Joey had completely missed the sarcasm, was speechless. Joey asked to borrow Bruce's car, but Chandler interrupted, "Joey, the stores are already closed. Tomorrow morning is your only option."
Joey shook his head. "Not necessarily. I'll check first. If it's closed, I'll drive around until I find one that's open."
Bruce pulled out his keys and handed them over. "I'll come with you."
Joey drove Bruce to the furniture store he'd meant to visit that afternoon—closed. Following his memory, he tried another one about three miles away—also closed.
"At this hour, there really won't be any furniture stores open. You could drive all over the city and still come up empty," Bruce said.
Joey groaned, "I figured at least one would still be open."
"We can come back tomorrow—let's just head home," Bruce suggested.
Joey replied, "But we're already out here. If I don't bring a table back tonight, I'll regret it."
Even so, he turned the car around and started back toward the apartment.
They hadn't gone far when, passing a sporting goods store that was still lit up, Joey suddenly hit the brakes.
"What?" Bruce asked.
"Look—a table. Let's check it out," Joey said, pointing into the shop.
Through the window, Bruce could see what looked like a table inside.
The moment they walked in, a clerk called out, "Hey guys, sorry, we're closing up!"
Joey said, "Just give me one minute—I want to look at that table!"
The clerk glanced where Joey was pointing. "Oh, that's actually a foosball table."
They walked over. Sure enough, it was a rectangular foosball table with raised wooden sides and rows of metal rods with little plastic players attached. Clearly not a regular table.
While they stared at it, the clerk pressed, "So, are you buying it? I really need to lock up."
Feeling pressured, Joey blurted, "Yes, I'll take it."
Trying to justify himself, he told Bruce, "With this we can play games, and if we put a board on top, it doubles as a table—total win."
Joey paid the clerk fifty dollars, and together they wrestled the foosball table into the trunk. Before driving away, Joey asked, "Think Chandler will go halves on this? After all, he did want a table."
Bruce laughed. "Why not? Chandler gets a table plus entertainment—just add a piece of wood. Take the tabletop off the old broken one, lay it over this thing, and you're all set."
Back at the building, Bruce helped Joey carry the foosball table upstairs, then headed to his own apartment. The first thing he did was call Estelle. "Hey, Estelle, how did it go with Miramax?"
Estelle answered, "I talked with them twice today—once in person at their offices, once on the phone after I got back. We've agreed on a price."
Bruce asked, "Really? What's the number—was it the three hundred thousand per script you were aiming for?"
Estelle corrected him with a higher figure.
Bruce's eyes widened. "How did it go up that much?"
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